Hey y’all welcome welcome welcome to another episode of outspoken i’m your host nigel ashford this is episode 11 and this is part two of our two episode series of joining an um divine nine as a lgbtq individual last week we had the men uh alpha kappa omega
Iota and sigma um people who were part of those organizations join us it was so dope and interesting and they spoke their truth they spoke their understanding they also gave us a lot more than that and made it so entertaining um so i was just so happy that they were there for that
Now we’re back again for part two and joining us are two amazing women um who are part of sororities uh we have miss sierra and we have miss reyna joining us today guys check them out here they come I’m not gonna lie i’m not All right starting with you sierra um your full name where are you from and what organization or sorority are you a part of sierra can you hear me well hello you all well i’m here um yep can you hear me yes i can hear you now can you hear me yes ma’am
I’m sierra i am from denver college original by the way of washington dc um and i moved down here to nashville i crossed out in court in spring 2014 and i’m here sierra i didn’t know we were in the same city sierra can you hear me yes
Yes we are oh my god we got to hang out yup i was just about to say Tell us who you are full name where you’re from what organizations sorority you’re a part of well hello uh everyone pleasure to be here my name is rena ingram um i’m from augusta uh went to college well undergrad at fort valley state university that’s where i pledged the 2014 delta sigma theta
Um and now i’m in atlanta so anytime y’all come to atlanta just let me know i got y’all when you look like you can get hyped too yeah and raymond And reyna has this gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous wife y’all go check them out shut up guys sabrina is doing it like this types of pictures too okay so why did you guys decide to join your sororities either you can go first um you know when when i came to uh
When i was doing my research about fraternities and all this kind of stuff like at first i thought i was just gonna do the whole legacy thing and join because my father was a cap of my my uncles and all my cousins were kappas
And i was like oh i’m going to be a kappa and then after i started you know seeing the alphas and being connected to them and saw what they were about and befriending them even though i even before i knew they were alphas i knew that was the organization for me
How did you know what organization what sorority was meant for you reyna or sierra whichever one wants to go first um i’ll go first uh i guess for me so my godfather he’s acute and i’ll never forget we had a conversation when i was in elementary school
My brother at the time was going to savannah state we walked across the campus and he said uh which one of these you know kind of stands out to you i’m a kid my nobody else in my family uh was greek so this was something new to my immediate family
Um so we got to talk and he was like i see something in you but we’ll have that conversation one day then i get to fort valley and the coast i got to college i just knew and as soon as i got to college and started you know
Seeing the women in certain positions leadership positions we have of course you know hbcus royal court sga uh just in different things uh leading the band leading you know top gpa and it was just for me i’m like okay not only is this a good sisterhood coming from
You know a single parent home i have an older brother he’s seven years older than me very small family uh so not only was it the sisterhood but it was the leadership it was the you know just goal smashing and it’s almost like you just sit there and
Like yeah that’s that’s going to be me one day um so i did what had to be done i i i put myself in that position and that was it there is [Laughter] I see that delta anointed spirits [Laughter] of course he dropped everything it was like i told you it was cut like he had a whole fit so yeah they’d be more excited than us [Laughter] sierra what is your story how did you choose alpha kappa alpha my first fam
Did you um well my mom okay hear me yes my mom she was uh she’s okay and it was just kind of in me it’s like a legacy thing and my mom was like don’t you pledge anything else besides aka or you know and i was like oh
Mom so you know i looked into it for myself i love what aka stood for i love their initiatives and what they do in the community and how they’ve made such a huge impact for years now and so it was one of the things that you made
Like you know this is where i go i feel like this is where i should be and so that was really my main reason of why i decided to join all right sierra you better sound like the spokesperson like yeah she was like this is why all right guys so what were your
Apprehensions a lot of people talk about apprehensions but apprehensions are different for different people while you have some people whose apprehensions are will my grades chop or some people who have apprehensions of what if i don’t make it what if you know i i they don’t like me or i don’t fit the
Mode but for people like us there are extra amount of apprehensions that goes on to it that a lot of people don’t know and for me and i don’t know if it was for you guys what if they find out i’m gay what if i’m outed what if i something takes place
While i’m going through my intake process of them finding out i’m gay and those run through your mind when you hear those horror stories what is it and and that’s the thing and i feel like as a gay man i feel like i never really thought about lgbtq women
What were your apprehensions as women like going through the intake process or thinking about going through the intake process of a sorority sierra i’m gonna let you start first um for me it was i know i’m gay but you know i don’t think they’re gonna be okay with it right now um
I knew like you know aka isn’t there yet with lgbtq committee or even talking about or having so for me you know back then my hair was very much so long um so i was like you know i’ll just fit in the image and i’ll just do you know
What i’m supposed to do and when i’m done no i’m gonna be who i really am just come out to the world and this is what it is and i cut my hair and people were like oh my god you cut your hair like why did you cut your hair how are
You going to swing your hair you know i need to do that um and still do everything and still be fine you know um you know so i was like forget it what about you reyna also for me uh you know so i just was not only
Thinking about it i was like i wish there was more inclusion but there was more of a discussion about it was more open gotcha gotcha thank you that’s true um for me it was an easy you know victim will read a book by its cover oh because
I cut my hair my sophomore year uh so i already went in with you know a low cut um i don’t wear feminine clothes um i’m very masculine in presentation so it’s not something that could be ignored um it’s kind of what greet you at the door before i open my mouth
Uh so my apprehension excuse me had to deal a lot with my sexuality students at storefront like if i don’t get this i know without a doubt that it’s because like that’s just there was no other reason um and i say that because uh and i
I usually don’t try to you know but this is the perfect conversation for this um as far as like leadership opportunities i did everything i was you know in sga had been in sga since my sophomore year uh by the time it was my senior year i was sga vice president
Um my gpa i graduated valedictorian in my class so it was like you can’t tell me that i don’t deserve this if you know it’s only because i’m masculine presenting and this is not something that has happened um especially in that you know at the hbcu you already got you know certain stigmas
In our community um as a whole just being african-american we you know we get onto it with each other uh but then to be in an organization that kind of stands in the forefront um you have you know people in college like yeah i want to be in the organization but then
Who are the members and then they see me that’s something that they haven’t seen i just knew my apprehensions had to deal with if i don’t get it it’s because of my sexuality and nothing else so did you guys ever feel the judgment so let’s say fast forward
Intake process did you feel the judgment did you feel the stairs did you feel the girl because i feel like with men we are either left alone or we’re picked on by being too feminine with women i feel that some women will be like oh i’m gonna stay away or i’m scared or
They don’t pick on you they leave you alone but they’ll talk about you am i being am i correct am i leaning towards the the right way or am i wrong you’re you’re leading in the right way um the process was interesting because just again masculine presenting
So the looks came automatically and that that comes from you know as being in the community that comes from anybody uh but it also just it was almost like it was a magnifying glass like why do you think you deserve this and you look the way you do
And it’s just kind of like not your accolades but right not not my accolades but what i look like yeah and it’s like you grow up reading don’t judge a book by your cover eyes cover and then it’s oh i’m going to show you that i’m more than what you see right
And i’m going to make like and it wasn’t like and sometimes a lot of people take that and run with it and they’ll say well why do you want to be a part of some something that doesn’t want you and that’s not what it is uh because
Delta is more and organizations is more than the school you cross at i’m not saying i had a bad experience what i’m saying is it’s a big world outside of wherever you know you cross right um and when i cross it the eyes literally it’s almost like they immediately turned into
I was the prized possession if that makes sense yes everybody like nobody at the school knew i was very very discreet when it came to that probate i told him i wanted a wig on i didn’t want nobody to know that that’s what i had done until i did it right and literally
I got so many messages about how people you know would think it’s impossible they’re like we look up to you we’re so happy for you know that we’re rooting for you because we never had the guts to even try because we would know that you know our sexuality would get in the way
So you’re definitely leading the right direction with the eyes with the comments and you know stuff like that now sierra i want to come to you did you ever have people let’s say That you know that didn’t make your sorority because of their sexuality that they were too masculine because when i think about the the prosthetic of what the aka is is pretty the feminine the gentle the kind the sweet the southern in my mind you know we’re from the southeast southern veil
Like you know so when you get someone who is a masculine individual or someone even like a feminine lesbian let’s just say that did did you ever see or hear or or someone came to you i know i didn’t make this organization because i did not fit the mode of what they
Wanted me to be no i didn’t have anybody before me that that had this issue um i was the first person that i was like hey i’m gay and i’m aka um and kind of made it a thing i knew when i pledged that like you know
Right here often you show these people you really are versus this cookie cutter what they want you to look like going to be like what the hell um Well that’s what we need in life um you know so they’re going to have to take me for who i am you know and i will you know i’m going to do some great things in this organization and i’ma look just and it’s gonna be like how she did
That she’s an ak and she looks like that she cut her hair and she dresses like that like what and so i was like yeah i’m gonna make that a thing i’m gonna make that normal right did you guys ever have to go through any type of code
Switching i feel like in our world and our jobs we’re at work we have to be some we have to feed somebody totally opposite in spaces and places so when you’re on your intake process and even now just approaching some of our older generation deep in it who wants you to
Be a certain way did you find yourself for for example sierra you know hi you know did you guys find yourself changing your mannerisms changing your voices changing the way you walk changing yourself to try to fit in with that sorority right now i’m going to let you go further
Um my code switching well i’m gonna say yes my code switching happened um when we had rushed with rush i took it and it wasn’t i don’t want to say it’s to fit in but then again i’m on i wanted to make a point because for me i’m like okay well if you
Don’t you know believe me that this is more than just something on the inside of the you know of a book i’m gonna show you that you know this should be no other discussion and so as uncomfortable as it was um i wore a skirt suit to rush and
Literally and i kid you not the funniest thing was seeing their facial expressions when i went into rush because it literally seemed like it clicked like did she really just do that oh oh my god to the point where nigel i’m just the part where somebody tried to take a
Picture and i’m seeing the flash and i’m like of all of all things to do you take a picture with the flash like yes i saw you i saw you right so other than that my code switching is going to meetings so when we have you know our monthly meetings
Um when you get into your alumni chapters and things like that it’s a little different certain you know certain like when there’s another line coming in you have a special ceremony where you know you have to wear certain things according to the guidelines and i haven’t become a troublemaker
Enough yet and i’m gonna say troublemakers i know it’s gonna bring about some issue the first lady not the first lady the first sunday uh listen [Laughter] like i just know the most i do is wear form-fitting pants and like a nice little blouse but it’s i’m at a point now i’m like
Like i literally had a conversation with someone the other day and they said why are you doing that and i got to thinking and i was like okay kind of got a point there because it’s almost like i forgot that me doing this is just to change the
Narrative like well not just a change in error but a big part of it is like sierra said to normalize this like this shouldn’t be an issue but it is so i’m i can’t if i conform you know to guidelines that shouldn’t be you know even in place then am i really
Helping change the narrative or am i just trying to stay out of the way and you know not cause problems or worry about other people’s feelings no i have to make you know pretty much myself comfortable and not worry about anybody else all right sierra what about you i know
You said that you even you cut your hair off girl oh did you have to do a whole switching um yeah i did um i did in the beginning like i think i was kind of coming to my own style instead of what people wanted me to look like versus what i
Wanted to look like um it would be where people i got the looks and the stairs and the heck and what it’s doing um but for me i was like i don’t care i think i’m cute i’m probably cuter than happy y’all but i’m cute yeah i was just trying to embrace myself
And get my confidence in it but i did have to twitch a lot in undergrad just because i was like okay today we can’t wear you know sweatpants in the shirt you know when i go out here you’re not gonna put on these heels and this blazer and
Bait my face to a certain extent and straighten out this hair and make sure i can loose that way you know and i was like how long are we going to do this so i was like you know what i’m i was thinking i was like 25
Before i’m like i’m not doing this anymore so how come it looking like this this is how i look if do you take it or not i don’t care but i’m comfortable yeah you know if you’re up right well that’s the issue but i’m good what let’s get working you know
It ain’t about what i look like i’m still doing work you know so that’s what it was that’s true though like i think a lot of people that we’re here to do service to others regard organization we’re in we have these initiatives we’re trying we’re all trying to in our own different way
You know make our community better why are we talking about what i look like it’s almost like i’m wearing a suit and a tie whatever and i get the same looks in church that i do when i walk into you know an official meeting why are we this ain’t what we’re here for
So it’s definitely it’s literally that that instilled that we have to break down those conversations like what we’re having now that we have to continue happening and we shouldn’t they have to happen if we’re going to at least try to make any type of you know strides in the right direction right
Right right all right guys we’re here with sierra and reyna we are having joining a sorority as a lgbtq individual and not just any sorority the divine nine sorority um again we have sierra arena here and we’re going to talk a lot more about their experiences
I’m going to ask them a couple more questions about what it’s like now being in grad chapter after their intake processes and and what they’re doing now to make strides but we’ll ask them those questions when we be back when we be right back after this commercial stay tuned
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Um and this is one thing that i asked the men while going through your process did people ever use derogatory terms towards your sexuality as a way to try to defeat you like one thing that was said to even uh my straight line brothers gay you know all these type of turns
And i’m looking like okay i get if you said it to me like but you’re saying it to these people and they’re straight and you’re making it sound like a negative thing and then when it was done to me and to the other brothers who were talking during last week’s conversation some of
Them took it like oh you know you know i’m not gonna i’m not based but some were because they knew they were targeting them were you ever targeted you when they use derogatory terms to make you feel a type of way or to get a reaction
Sierra i’m going to um i’ve never got calls like crazy names my sister my line sisters did not allow any of that i like had a conversation we had like a powwow because they were like we just want to get to know you better are you gay i’m like yeah
You know and they were like well if anybody trying to mess with you they’re gonna have to come through us and we don’t play about you i was like yes nobody ever approached me crazy if anything they embraced me out of anything and i made it fun i was like
We’re not going to make this weird yes i’m gay and i like girls we like dudes let’s talk about it you know what i mean and they were just like oh she’s so cool about i’m like yeah because it ain’t nothing to be like shamed about because that’s showing all right
They were probably having this whole girl you asked no girl you asked a girl i’m gonna ask you after do you think i’m cute because if you think i’m cute and the guy thinks i’m cute then i must be pretty damn fine and i was like yeah girl
You pretty damn fine you know oh man right uh not that i can remember i don’t remember there ever being a time where it was like that um and i have the same uh situation as sierra the same experience um the only difference is we didn’t have to have the conversation
Uh and that’s one thing that’s literally one of the best parts about my experience is my line sisters never like looked at me crazy never said anything crazy never made me feel different like literally it wasn’t even if the only discussion was we know you’re gay
It is what it is now let’s go eat like it was never it was never a you know one of those things that i had to explain that i had to explain i don’t look at y’all that way i’m not interested like we didn’t have to do all of that
Um which to me like i said it was one of the best parts um is having sisters that never questioned it never felt weird around me um just like sarah had those conversations like you know hey girl what you doing like you know like i’m i’m a girl too like we can
Right you know so we can have those conversations it’s not going to be weird like and i feel like delirious right and i feel like a lot of times uh people don’t get those experiences uh but lucky enough for me and sierra you know we we did and
And that that’s good to hear coming from you know someone in another organization as well yeah um did you did your parents both of your parents that your parents know about your sexuality at the time yes so were they and it’s always the parent i feel like who
Puts the fear in you because they’re so afraid were your parents like oh my god don’t tell them they might say something they might do something oh my god my baby don’t make me have to come up there your parents right i’ll show out i’ll show out i’ll go to jail
Oh but my mom honestly she was scared of me going to college so we just go right there like dropping me off at college was very emotional for her um because i came out to her my 11th grade year um it wasn’t a horrible experience
Coming out to her but it did take some processing you know she had in her mind a son and a daughter and it wasn’t that i ever you know mentioned anything about transitioning or anything but she had the i get you know see my daughter walk down the island a dress
And do all this so she was processing that and you know we always by that time we were having open conversations and then she goes to drop me off at cops and she like well you’re far away you don’t have a car yet what if something happens to you
People aren’t as you know are always going to be accepting and i had to tell her like then literally before my first day i got on campus i told her mom if somebody takes my life because of my sexuality at least i know i died being true to myself and did
Something that they couldn’t do for themselves so i was like if this is the last time we’re seeing each other i love you but understand i i’m willing to die being myself and being happy and living my truth because that’s i can say you know i can’t say that for everybody
It’s not even straight people i can’t even say that for them so you know she had a fear for me going to college so i’m not i’m not even gonna say anything about the rest of the oh years sierra what about you um my parents did not know that i was gay until
Like really like came to grips last year wow yeah when i pledged that i didn’t tell nobody i was like this is for me myself and i um just because i was like you know i knew my mom wasn’t like gonna be all the way
For it but i was like i know we’re gonna have to have a conversation and we did and she was like i don’t care who you are you still my daughter and ain’t nothing taking the relationship i have between me and you no matter who you get so that’s how i
Feel and i said well amen mom you know they came around they were like we don’t care see or we’ve been known yuba skates since she was a kid i was in that department I’m sitting here tiptoeing around like like we know why you didn’t bring your friend home for thanksgiving right [Laughter] oh man so fast forward i’m so sorry no you’re fast forward you guys got your letters you’re representing your sorority and everything did you hey because this is what it was for me
Did you finally see a whole different world of your sorority of lgbtq individuals after you crossed because after i crossed i was like oh my god he’s gay he’s gay he’s gay there are gay groups there are gay greek groups oh my god they’re great they’re gay trips with greeks and i was
Like oh i saw this whole dude it’s almost like a little underground world or where you can be yourself and be greek did you guys find that after you crossed sierra i did um i found that a lot i think it was right after i crossed i got
Into this group me and it was like thousands of aka that were in the lgbtq community i was like what the really bring up and i was like hold up and i mean it was like globally like all over the world and i was like oh this lit
I’m over here tripping like it’s just one of me no there’s thousands of me um so we talked to you let’s hang out are you in atlanta i’m in nashville let’s turn up let’s go to a.g like we was talking so i found a huge group of people that i didn’t even know
Existed um that were in the lgbtq community and it was really great because i i have some great relationships with them oh wow are you closer to them than you are closer to your ls’s no i’m closer to my line sisters uh more than them i haven’t really got to see
Them like i want to especially during covid and i haven’t been able to travel and go places you know um but i’m more closer to my line sisters just because they’re here we hang out you know we’ve been through a lot together two organizations not just this one so it’s like
We know each other okay inside and all the way out god what about you see so as far as um just a whole new world opening it definitely was um it wasn’t through a group me experience uh now group now see bet when in 14 group meetings are
Definitely the thing once you cross you got all these different you know uh notifications and things in different groups you me meeting different people but it’s one of those for me the experiences came by just being out like going to different schools and you know just anytime like agp
You would go you would just see and it was almost like both of you knew like well of course for the more masculine presented you’d be like okay and then you know it’s harder to tell for films um but they seem to be more like open to letting you know you know as
You’re sore like hey like it’s so good to see you you know type thing like being in the same community the best experience i had with that type of scenario um i went to a probate at clark atlanta and it was a soror from 74. i believe that was her year and she
Literally stopped me out of nowhere just stopped me and was like hey let me talk to you real quick of course me i’m like what i did i didn’t do anything i’m just here visiting um and she mentioned how she was happy to see me she said because coming from a time
You know in 74 she was like it was hard enough and she was like to see how things have you know progressed and to see me just you know willing to just be you know be myself and be around and not you know use literally act like i was prohibited from
Doing things because of my sexuality we literally it was almost like having a shoulder just to be there we exchanged numbers we talked every now and then like just to just catch up how are you doing how is everything and literally a couple months ago she called me we hadn’t talked in years
Couple months ago she called me to let me know formally that she was transitioning and we had a whole discussion about what that meant and the crazy part about it is none of that discussion had anything to do with delta like that bond we built yes it was it
Started because you know we were in the same organization we you know we looked and presented ourselves the same way she had a short haircut she dressed masculine but the relationship that grew from it our conversation eventually had nothing to do with delta and that was the beauty of it
You form these relationships and you get into these spaces and you realize that you’re more united by a lot of other things yeah so now after you guys you know earned your letters and let’s say a year pass or six months past determine depending and another line is to get ready to
Come up and it’s time to choose who they would want on the line did during that process when you’re with your sisters looking at these applications did it ever come up she’s gay she’s she’s a lesbian uh-uh we have enough in here already did you guys ever have to now speak up
And be like hey i’m gay and i’m in here we need more people of lgbtq and our organizations we can’t keep staying on this route that took place in the early 1900s if that was the case you know having you aka is going to be here because you know y’all are dark skinned
You know happy y’all would be here because of this and this and this so did you guys ever have to stand up for those who came after you to try to get them in as well no for me um the line that came right after me was the line that i brought out
Um so no i didn’t have any of those issues i didn’t have to do that for any of them all 107 nope not any of them um i was like wait a minute let me think but no i didn’t have to do that but um i enjoyed bringing them out i enjoyed
You know pledging them and you know making sure they were together and it was it was the most difficult thing i think i’ve ever done at that point in my life because i was like you’re really about to bring out 107 girls and they’re all gonna look together and they’re gonna be
Perfectly insane like you’re gonna really listen like it’s for real you know all their names no i don’t no i don’t and i can say that facebook listen they approach me and they’d be like but they know your heart they know your heart that’s all they’re about right that’s all that matters you
Know what i’m saying because they approach me and i’ll be like oh you’re my kid oh hey girl like i forgot oops you know i literally offered i mean if you watch the video you see me just storming down with this big cane just like
Y’all breathing am i at the end of the line yet you good you walk back let’s walk back tap tap everybody else good okay um as far as i’m concerned um the only thing i would say regarding that situation is did me crossing make people feel more willing to put
Themselves out there yes it did um but for me the conversations i had came from people feeling comfortable to come to me like hey we see you do it we know it’s possible like you know and we would have those discussions and it’s it’s the upside in the downside
It’s almost like you turn into the golden child and sometimes people feel like you’re that ticket like okay i need to talk to this person she gonna make sure to get it done regarding my gpa ain’t what it’s supposed to be regardless that i don’t do nothing but sit on campus and smoke
All day she gonna get it done because this is what i wanted she look like and that’s that’s honestly like the downside of it like it’s almost like okay we gonna talk i’m gonna help you understand there’s more than just presentation right you know so you you you get put
In like you’re almost like a rock in a hard place because like i don’t want to tell you no because i understand how hard it is but you have to understand that it’s more than just sexuality like there’s there’s a lot of other things in play
Oh so would you say it’s almost like having the black talk but with lgbtq like you now have to work twice as hard like i feel like the reason i made it is because i knew they couldn’t turn me away i gave them a reason where they could my gpa
Was around up here i was part of these organizations where i have influence over the campus i knew why they could why they would say no give them a reason to not have a reason to not say no and it’s like having that that talk with your young african-american
Child you have to work twice as hard and better is is that similar to what you now have to mentor to those upcoming undergrads that want to be deltas it feels like that um and i’m not even going to sugarcoat it it definitely if it felt like that
And you don’t want to be that person that feels like you you crush somebody else’s dreams because you know what it was like to be in a position uh but i it was me helping them understand like you don’t have to have you know everything figured out no
Organization wants you to be this fake presenting person who seems to want to say all the right things to get it no authenticity is it like do at the end of the day and for me it wasn’t i never looked at it as what
Can delta do for me but what i can do for adults right and a lot of people you know seem to forget that when you get into this type of organization that you’re working for the better for the betterment of your community right and it’s not just a popularity
Thing it’s not oh i don’t you know i don’t have sisters i i want like it’s it’s more to that involved so you have to have those conversations you have to talk about okay well you know it’s more than just what you look like what do you bring to the table what can
You you know what are your grades like what are your you know goals what are your careers like why do you want this right because sometimes people just want it because they seen you do it they’re like oh well i can’t do this let me do
It and they don’t have nothing else in their mind as to the next goal all right guys we’re here with sierra and reyna um we’re going to ask him a couple more questions um so stay tuned we’re gonna go to a quick commercial break but again we’re here with these two and
We’re talking about joining the divine nine as lgbtq individuals part two stay tuned for people living with hiv keep being you and ask your doctor about big target big tarby is a complete one pill once a day treatment used for hiv in certain adults it’s not a cure but with one small pill
Big tarby fights hiv to help you get to and stay undetectable that’s when the amount of virus is so low it cannot be measured by a lab test research shows people who take hiv treatment every day and get to and stay undetectable can no longer transmit hiv through sex
Serious side effects can occur including kidney problems and kidney failure rare life-threatening side effects include a build-up of lactic acid and liver problems do not take pictarvy if you take dophetilide or rifampin tell your doctor about all the medicines and supplements you take if you are pregnant or breastfeeding
Or if you have kidney or liver problems including hepatitis if you have hepatitis b do not stop taking victory without talking to your doctor common side effects were diarrhea nausea and headache if you’re living with hiv keep loving who you are and ask your doctor if mctarvey is right for you Coming at you y’all welcome back to outspoken joining me is reina and sierra now i want to jump right into this um what is your organization now doing to make strides to keep up with the times things are changing changing right before the show i ask what are your personal approach
Are people are your organization take into consideration personal pronouns the cisgender cis female the transgender community um she’s a delta and she was telling me she was like you know during our meeting we were talking about transgendered females and letting them into delta and she said during the meeting
We heard this older woman hmm like they’ll be like sister sarkozy are you all right she was quite young and you know that mean a lot sure do it’s just too much so we have a lot of older people who think this is lunch so i’m gonna start with you uh uh
Uh random with the um where where is delta sigma theta now and letting in transgendered females and all of that and also are the opinions to retrospec the pronouns and women who are now going by instead of she they’re going by they them for in my
Synopsis of the situation it’s more of a long road ahead um there’s more of the one-to-one conversations than them happening on a grand scale on a grand scale excuse me and i just feel like you know these are there’s different ways we can tackle it we need to
Start having those okay what are your pronouns uh type of conversations i’m not saying you have to walk into every room and you have to put you know your name tag on it has to say uh she her or they them i’m not saying that i’m just saying
It needs to be a space where that them days feel comfortable as much as the she hears but i feel like they don’t need to come to a meeting or they need to be you know a member that doesn’t you know like a member at large where they can
Just be a member pay their dues do all of that and not have to attend a meeting because of the the looks or the disregard for their pronouns or anything like that like there’s still a long road ahead before we can even get to that conversation because that’s that is so
Far in the you know just the climate you can even just see it if you just even scroll on you know simple you know greek pages you can see what we had now with the younger generation in the millennials uh they we if we’re thinking this now if our community as a whole
If we’re getting this now from our own age groups and people around us we got that from who we were raised by right so it literally is a long breath now uh right it’s a long road ahead and i feel like you know those conversations do need to start happening
Right um you know just all around um as of right now i don’t know that aka has done anything necessarily anything in the lgbtq community right or to even to make it inclusive to where it is a conversation um i would think i’m the first person to
Ever have a conversation to put ak and lgbtq in the same conversation um i think it’s going to take it’s a long time we have a long road ahead to break some things that have been taught that are irrelevant now um that we should grow from instead of continuing
Um that they need to do but it’s so it’s a long road ahead just like rena said it’s gonna take some time but y’all isn’t it kind of crazy though and this is what i said to the guys same with the church you have gay men leading the choir playing the instruments
You even have gay preachers you have them bringing in the money bringing in the congregation bringing in the talent same with the sororities and the fraternities so why isn’t it being accepted because being honest a lot of them are in those leadership roles a lot of them are paying that money a
Lot of them are the ones who are putting these programs yeah that’s keeping the organizations afloat going towards the future like and it’s a lot of them who are actually crossing the t’s and dotting the eyes they’re understanding we don’t need this this this to happen
So we see them doing the work we’re seeing them in the positions but why aren’t we making it a comfortable environment to let them know you are welcome and i think it’s really just it’s uncomfortable it’s foreign like to them i feel like it’s just it’s too brand new um it’s a subject
That’s very broad but it takes a lot to educate yourself on lgbtq and actually wanting to educate yourself and wanting to make a change and wanting to open up that dialogue i feel like people are just afraid to touch it because it’s like oh no it’s too far
From you know 1908 um and it’s like no it’s not it’s actually current you know let’s talk about it let’s stop sweeping it under the rug like black people been doing for years about a lot of different things um you know and if you know they created these
Organizations for black people to have a safe space to come to i mean that was one of the main foundations and now you have people that are in the lgbtq community that want to join divine nine but feel unsafe with their own view why is that a problem you can take
Somebody who’s white they join your organization you praise them to death but what about your brother and sister who’s been standing here for you you want to work just as much more more than them why aren’t you recognizing them but you want to sweep them under the rug you
Don’t want to give them the recognition and so i i dealt with that in my organization and i made it a very much so a goal of mine before i graduated i was like i’m gonna make a huge imprint on aka and on this campus and i did with bringing out 107 girls
When nobody wanted to do that because it was like oh that’s ugly why would you bring out 107. oh it’s this so it’s that and i’m like these girls wanna do this so i’m gonna give them all of my energy and bring them out the way that they
Need to be brought out expose them to the world in the most beautiful way it’s gonna be great regardless of all your negative comments because you just stuck in that mindset but you can stay over there i love you today um you know and i was like and i’m gonna
Do this thing and not only am i gonna do it i’m gonna do it great and i’m gonna make this and it’s gonna be huge and it was and it was a thing and it was very popular very trendy on greek shenanigans and a whole bunch of other stuff
But i was like it’s here and then a whole bunch of other big lines came out right after the fact and i was like oh there’s 204 now oh man for real like the whole small line thing is out the window like my mother fled she had four
Including her she was ace and that was it i was like four mom at least you got to learn your four i’m like i got 41. and now i’m about to bring out 107. they barely know the girl at the end but you know man you know i’m like
Because how are you about to learn 107 personalities in a short amount of time you’re not you’re going to learn the bare minimum and keep going you know and that’s just is what it is but you know so i was like now let’s change the narrative we’re going to make
This great and i did and it’s been very popular at tsu ever since i can go back and steal i feel like a little celebrity sometimes when i walk on campus like oh you’re the one that brought out 100 you’re the yes it’s me hello people let’s not make anything it’s really
Weird you know but yeah so i just i decided to flip the narrative on the whole negative attribute that they were trying to put on it because i was like it don’t need to be negative get out y’all’s feeling now what if a person is married if two women who are married or
Female is married to a transgender woman or a transgender male and and they let that be no grad undergrad or grad are there chances less likely that they’ll be in if they’re married to um application they do ask are you single or are you married do you have a spouse
And then they we do there’s been times where we do have undergrad and grads who have had a spouse and we’ve had times where it did not go that way because of who their spouse were well i’ve never personally you know encountered that type of situation or scenario um
I can say it will probably be talked about and it would probably be talked about negatively um you’re gonna have your people like i don’t care but then you’re gonna have a lot of very opinionated people um which it kind of relates back to your last question it’s a culture
Thing um and i think it’s so intertwined in our upbringing as african americans that is it’s gonna take some some some work some discussions some making people uncomfortable um to have those conversations um just like you said in church it’s the same thing like you know yeah we’re here
We praise the ones that’s here even though you know we probably feel some type of way about the ones that we don’t know when it’s just like we’re you know we’re all in the same community so it’s it’s it’s definitely a culture thing it’s definitely you know how we were raised um it’s
Definitely the beliefs that have been passed on from generation to generation to generation that we definitely have to break down now how are you and this is going to be one of my couple final questions how are akas and deltas receiving the new lgbt organizations such as the miyakas
And the men of distinction they learn your history they do similar strolls even when we go out to the clubs we see them strolling their butts off and they go through processes and um i i met one who wasn’t miaka and he informed me you know akas actually came
To our process and we’re like oh you know and they were they were fine and they were like oh they were making sure we knew our information how has the organizations received those lgbtq organizations who are imitating them because they can’t believe it i haven’t really personally i haven’t
Came an encounter with anyone who was i’ve heard a conversation like little conversation about it when i was in undergrad for like 10 seconds and then it would just stop and i was like wait what what what happened who did what and i was like what
What they doing i was so confused i was like i gotta look at this because i don’t know what’s going on you know but okay you know but i don’t i don’t really know because i’ve never really like really got to encounter that it’s really un
Like to see and understand what it was so i i really don’t know oh i’ve seen it um well teach me because i don’t know and the crazy part about it is i’ve seen actually a male who’s feminine in presentation that he believes in his mind that he is okay
I’ve seen it i’ve i kid you not would be b was at the probates wearing his pink and green and i was like literally the the everybody’s looking at him like no don’t do it friend right like please don’t uh the most that i’ve heard outside of that
And he didn’t um he just was very supportive the most outside of that is the just the talking the you know i can hear them say that they want to do something but like you said like i hear it in conversation but i’ve never blatantly in my face have seen
I’m not gonna say here uh and i’m also not gonna act like i don’t wanna have a conversation with with those individuals because for me i want to know why like yeah you know why are you doing that because big part of me feels very disrespected and that’s just me being honest because
I’m like okay i earned this but what is it that makes you feel like you did too like do you feel like it’s because you know like are your pronouns different are you know and you know we don’t live in an acceptable society like you know are you transitioning have you
Tried like you know it’s just it’s a lot of conversation and i want to have it but i haven’t been unable to like i’ve never been presented to see those organizations face to face i know that they exist i see them a lot on greek shenanigans we live in a society that posterizes
Them and literally elevates them to a point where people can talk about them like literally that’s all greek shenanigans and all these other pages are posting them for is to literally bash them and it’s like okay well if you don’t like them you don’t like them like why are you you’re literally
Creating a platform for hate you know what i’m saying so it’s just i want to have those conversations but i’m not going to act like when i see it through videos that i don’t feel disrespected because i do so you say what i feel you on it yeah like how
How how please let me understand i’m confused you know what i’m saying man i got to come to tennessee no you should you should you know what rina i saw you on shanice’s vlog and i said oh no when i saw marina on this flight i said i watched her whole wedding
I was like so excited i was like oh my god this is lit i was like i basically knew a little bit of reena’s pre-story to this when i did the one the the fraternities a lot of them were oh my god someone’s having to see oh my god i was like wait
A minute you all know each other so at this time this time we always like well happy damn okay it’s a small world yeah in different states different fraternities but somehow y’all have me all right okay cool keep it moving all right um i think my last question is what type of project
Can be done that you would want to create for undergrad or for high school girls who are lgbtq to let them know that your organization is supporting them as women and not by their sexual preference i would say specifically that i don’t think they see it
I don’t think they’re being told that i don’t think they’re being nurtured to understand that um a lot of and then even just thinking about it we still live in a society well although it’s it’s more accepted than it used to be you still have kids and i’m a high
School teacher so i understand the dynamics of kids who still can’t come out to their parents know that they’ll get kicked out so if they still you know worried about the home life of course they’re thinking well you know in their mind i want to feel safe i want to go
You know and it’s like what sierra said earlier we created these organizations for our community but then there are still times and experiences that shun those within the community yeah so they don’t see it we’re not telling them we’re so i feel like events is such is what we’re doing now
Have these events invite them out like yeah we have events you know at our colleges and you know of course if you know they’re interested they show up to the event they don’t say anything they just stay in the back and become a familiar face until it’s time for them to say something
But we need to keep going back like go go to the high schools and have events where we’re catering to those that are coming up so they know that they feel accepted because even if they end up not joining any organization they have that memory that keeps them pushing
As a high school student who feels like they have nobody else do they they want to feel seen they want to feel understood they want to feel loved and even if those conversations make that happen then you know that’s the least that you can hope for mm-hmm talk about it um for me
Um i feel like if you know organizations they do seminars they do hazing seminars well why don’t we do a seminar about the lgbtq community you know we do seminars on everything but why not that you do seminars on racism within camp with just on the campus being in the south
Why don’t we talk about this why can’t this be a conversation and a panel of women who are in the lgbtq community in all different aspects of divine sit on a panel and talk about it you know we should be doing that that is one thing that i thought would be really
Cool to do i get some kids from tsu that will be like oh i know you’re an aka and i also know that you’re gay because i went to one of your shows for pride and that it okay and they’re like you know so you know what was your experience and i
Am too and i really like you know so i talked to them get their number i’m like if you have any questions give me a call you know i’m here for you and i feel like we just need more people out in the forefront that people know
That there’s other people like us out here that are in divine line because people don’t talk about it it’s like on the hush unless you know somebody else and while you’re there like they see you and you do instantly it’s almost like you become a celebrity because that oh man we haven’t we
Haven’t seen this like oh like and almost like you’ll walk into a room and don’t know what to say nothing they just look at you and i’m like okay hi i’m normal like how you doing we can we can converse like i’m not not gonna hurt you not gonna because you
We can talk like but it’s literally like you become somebody rare like as if they’ve never seen you and it’s so crazy that they even you know think to do that and it’s like just talk like we’re we’re just like you we just now have a letter so i mean like
We’re normal people we have a lot of the same common interests right so it’s it’s definitely those conversations awesome thank you so much rayna and sierra um before we go guys what do you have coming up what projects are you working on tell me what’s in the future in store for you
Um brandon you just got through speaking uh so go ahead and just let it rap then see your arrow will get to you uh well um i do uh call on with my wife actually freedom to love i started it actually my senior year at fort valley
Um because we didn’t have you know a space we didn’t have like gay student alliance we didn’t have anything like that so had an event for the campus to talk about our issues and it just literally sparked from there so this is actually year five
Um so definitely a big you know a big thing uh but you can follow freedom to love it’s freedom to two uh love it’s on instagram um facebook page uh then personal page the the underscore ingram um and pretty much t custom t-shirts uh blogs every month
Just to talk about different issues um you know within the lgbtq community um just a lot of things uh so i definitely you know hope you guys check it out awesome uh i just i’m thinking it was like uh like oh my god yeah we found it mates and [Laughter]
You never know who you’re gonna find up in the comments now we’re gonna have one uh like like sierra said the wedding was so beautiful right away [Laughter] sierra what do you got coming up what’s going on um well i am an artist here in nashville um so it’s
My first name spelled backwards which is a wreak um i’m going to be putting out an ep very soon this summer my first ep i have two singles out one called good vibes one called please don’t um available everywhere and also i am a ceo of my own entertainment company here in nashville
And i put on this huge festival every year um i will be putting it on next year it’s called the funk so summer jam festival i get about five to six artists up on the stage that are locally around here in nashville or just locally around in the country period
And i give them a platform and i let them do their thing you know and i get up there as well so that’s what i’ll be doing very soon and you can find me at a-r-r-e-i-c star on instagram and just a-r-r-e-i-c anywhere else all right in sierra
You would drop the link to like where they can purchase your music on the comments so you guys go support we have to support and we have to invest in our community and lift each other up so sierra reyna guys thank you so much no thank you thank you had a great time
Thank you thank you see you have to come out of tennessee right yes i’m out here you got to take a road trip into georgia just let me know come All right guys thank you guys so much thank you thank you now everyone i want you to stay tuned for next week’s episode we’re going to do a mother’s day special where we are bringing a trans mom a trans female who’s a mother we’re also going to have a mother who is
A lesbian and also a mother who is a cis straight female but she’s the mom of a lgbtq um um individual and we’re gonna just have the different perspectives of each of those different moms telling what it means to be a mom in their own right while
Living as either a trans a lesbian or a straight woman raising an lgbtq individual um and we’re just going to bring them all together and we’re just going to discuss how they are living their lives learning who they are learning who they are as mothers as an individual
And also just also elevating and evolving as there is themselves and learning more about themselves in their in their process of life so make sure you stay tuned for that next week um so we only got what seven more episodes to go eight more episodes to go for this
Season and we’re really excited um and also if you’re interested in um wanting a commercial done on our show make sure you hit me up through our direct messaging um outspoken lgbtq or emailing us at outspoken lgbtq gmail.com so guys this was an amazing part one part two we had heard from amazing
Fraternities and sororities i don’t think this has ever been done before and this took a lot of work and i just want to say thank you to both the sororities and the fraternities for just using this platform to tell their truth to tell their stories and just to feel vulnerable and use this
Space to help somebody else who’s listening out there so guys like we always say at the end stay outspoken i ran out of breath that means it’s time for me to quit it’s time for me to stop all right guys we’ll see you next week stay safe love you bye
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