– MEN, AS WE LAUNCH THE COUNTERATTACK AGAINST THE UNION ARMY, WE MUST REMEMBER THAT EVEN THOUGH WE MAY DIE A GLORIOUS DEATH ON THE BATTLEFIELD, WE DO SO TO PRESERVE A WAY OF LIFE. THE SOUTHERN WAY OF LIFE. A WAY OF LIFE SO PURE AND BEAUTIFUL
THAT NO MAN NOR GOVERNMENT CAN TAKE THIS AWAY FROM US. THE RIGHT… THE RIGHT TO PRESERVE. OUR OWN SO– TO– WE A– OH, [bleep]. – WELL, HELLO THERE, MASSA. SORRY WE LATE. – SHORE DIDN’T MEAN TO SNEAK UP ON YA, SIR. – LOOK, FELLAS, WE’RE TRYING TO HAVE
A NICE, LITTLE CIVIL WAR REENACTMENT HERE. WE DON’T WANT ANY TROUBLE. – SO ARE WE, SIR. WE–WE–WE TRYING TO HAVE A REAL NICE REENACTMENT. WE CERTAINLY DON’T WANNA CAUSE ANY TROUBLE EITHER. DO WE, SAM? – YOU ALWAYS TAUGHT US TROUBLE ONLY COMES TO THOSE WHO GONE DONE LOOKIN’ FOR IT.
– SO DON’T STOP YOUR SPEECHIN’ ON OUR ACCOUNT. [giggles] – AS JEFFERSON DA–OKAY, I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING. I GET IT. – WHAT WE DOIN’, SIR? I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU TALKIN’ ‘BOUT. DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE TALKIN’ ‘BOUT, SAM? – WHY, WE JUST HERE TO SLAVE ON ABOUT,
ANY OLE WHICH WAY YOU WANT US TO. – HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL PEOPLE, JUST BECAUSE WE’RE DRESSED LIKE CONFEDERATE SOLDIERS DOESN’T MEAN WE’RE PRO SLAVERY? WE’RE JUST HERE TO PRESERVE THE PURE AND BEAUTIFUL SLICE OF SOUTHERN HISTORY. – YEAH, PURE AND BEAUTIFUL… SLICE.
– OH, LORDY, LORDY, LORDY! WE SORRY, BOSS! OH, WE SO SORRY! – PLEASE DON’T GIVE US THE WHIP. – OKAY, NOBODY’S GONNA WHIP ANYBODY, JUST STOP IT. – YEAH, JUST STOP IT. – ALL RIGHT, FELLAS, JUST– JUST IGNORE ‘EM. ALL RIGHT? NOW, WE’RE HERE TO PRESERVE OUR WAY OF LIFE.
THE SOUTH HAS A RIGHT TO OWN– both: ♪ OH, MY LORD, LORD ♪ – THE SOUTH HAS A WAY OF LIFE– both: ♪ OH, MY LORD ♪ – THE UNION CANNOT STOP US FR– both: ♪ OH, MY LORD, LORD ♪ ♪ OH, MY LORD… ♪ – THE UNION YANKEE BASTARDS CANNOT STOP US–
– ♪ OH, LORD! ♪ – ALL RIGHT, STOP IT! STOP IT! THAT’S ENOUGH! YOU WANNA BE PART OF THIS REENACTMENT? FINE. YOU’RE PART OF IT. GO–GO FETCH US SOME MUNITIONS AND EVERYTHING ELSE THAT– DON’T JUST STAND THERE LIKE A BUNCH OF LAZY [bleep].
– THAT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? – THAT IS ALL I NEEDED TO HEAR. – GENTLEMEN, GIVE US YOUR CASH AND ANYTHING THAT IS AN ACTUAL COLLECTOR’S ITEM. – YOU RACIST MOTHER[bleep]. – OKAY. DON’T HAVE ALL DAY, MAN. OKAY, THANK YOU. THANK YOU. WALLETS, WALLETS, WALLETS, WALLETS. – THAT’S A VERY NICE PIECE.
THESE ARE HEAVY.
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They obviously DONT KNOW WTF THEY’RE DOING 