Hey everyone welcome back to my channel my name is Sabrina for those of you who are new to my channel and as you can see by today’s title this video is going to be on why I denounced my Greek letters and a little bit more so let’s just get
Right into it because this might be a cute little lengthy video if you’ve been following me for a while then you know that I was a part of a sorority called Alpha Kappa Alpha and I joined while I was in my undergrad years at Euro St John’s University that’s not no secret
But I didn’t ask my letters it was a shocker too A lot of people because I am that girl like I don’t have to you know do no talking I am that girl and I did make a video on why I denounced but I feel like I was so heated in that
Moment that I could not even say what needed to be said it’s been about two three years and I decided to make this video because you know I meditate a lot and God just told me that he wants me to speak on this so I’m going to speak on
My experience my advice my takeaways this is not going to be me bashing or it’s not going to be me bashing anybody a part of the org or anybody who decides that they want to join a Greek organization this is just my experience my story and yeah let’s just get right
Into it I attended Hampton University for two years and then I transferred to St John’s for my last two years and while I was at Hampton I was interested in joining a Greek organization like anybody else would be when you attend HBCU but I feel like the girls were
Really mean like they were really mean girls like it just made you want to be like nah never mind like I’m good so I never really pursued any interest in um joining the sorority on campus at Hampton and plus I had a lot going on my second year before I transferred so I
Honestly did not have the opportunity to express my interest while I was at Hampton when I transferred to St John’s during my sophomore to junior year I just went through a lot to transferred to a new school I didn’t know nobody I just did not know anybody so I said this
Is a great opportunity for me to meet new people meet new friends because I’ve had the same friends that I’ve had since middle school you know and I was like you know I’m in college I need to make memories this is a great opportunity for
Me to have a fresh start so I started going out to events on campus where they would have like you know different clubs different organizations but they had a little table and I stopped by the table and I asked a really dumb question and it looked at me like
Like does she really ask that but you know I had a quick comeback because I’m like listen y’all not know y’all listen y’all regular people y’all not gonna make me feel stupid so I came back with something and you know they said ever since then I had that little um comeback
And made them you know interested in me you know but I mean why wouldn’t you be interested in me even before you know being on campus if you see me around campus I was the it girl like I don’t have to do no talking what I’m giving
Right now is what I give on a regular basis so my woman should be interested in me so ever since that little interaction with the girls of the organization at that time I started going out to the events and you know you know what they
Had to offer and I was just then I started building relationship with the girls and organization and I think that’s one another I got a phone call and that’s just what happened we’re gonna leave it at that I wanted to join the organization because I wanted to
Meet like-minded people I wanted to meet new friends like if you had the opportunities to join an organization you would so why not another reason why I honestly wanted to join the organization was because I always knew that I was going to be an influential person and I felt like me joining the
Sorority would make my destiny come faster to me I feel like I would have been on a fast track to being the big influencer that I wanted to be because I had letters and x y z so that’s honestly another reason why you know I was interested in joining the org but little
Did I know me joining it was going to prolong my destiny we did have a small little process um but this is not something that I had to go me personally I did not have to go above and beyond um because I was wanted like I was wanted there were tough times but
I watched other people go through harder times and this is no shade but if you you know if you was around during that time like if not me then who like come on I don’t want to turn it into like a little you know Shady kind of thing because it’s really not but
It’s really the truth like if not me then who when I became a member of the organization I wanted to have like my own personal best friend slash sister like I wanted to have my own personal person that I can like call on the that y’all see in the movies on the TV
That’s what I wanted but I did not get that everybody had their person and it was none of us everybody was close with somebody I was not close for anybody it was just me I’m not gonna put the blame on the other girls because I operate very different and I totally understand
Why it’ll be easier to you know just be closer to somebody else because one I’m very raw I’m gonna tell you the truth whether you like it or not and I’m not going to sugarcoat it people who’s not from New York it can be kind of rare
Like it can be too much so that’s already one secondly I don’t know how many times I have to make this clear I do what I want when I want how I want like and you just cannot talk me out of it I say all that to say that not putting
The blame on anybody else as to why I did not get what I wanted out of that I did have a person playing it but I was just being me I was not gonna change who I was because I got letters I was not going to be you know under anybody’s
Eyes I was not going to do any of that because I had letters I’m somebody who’s been alone for a long time like even if I had so many people around me I always felt alone so it was just like okay whatever like it’s cool not saying that
Didn’t have any relationship to anybody because I had at that time I have really good relationships with my pros and people who came before me I had great relationships with them at that time I just did not have that sister that I thought I was gonna have when I crossed
I had some great times and some great memories when everything was all good Crossing 2018 Dean for the 2019 line because if not me then who and even with that the girls that crossed in 2019 were not girls of my choice and I’m gonna make that very clear I don’t care nobody
Feels about that because I’m going to be me in this video they were not girls of my choice the girls of my choice were not being voted on everybody has to vote on one person like you have to have all the votes and I thought it was kind of
Funny how all of the girls that I wanted the girls who were really bosses like the girls who were really doing their thing girls who were a reflection of me when I would bring them up would have a million or one excuses as to why they
Didn’t want them to be online and I came to find out later on that there was plotting because let’s be real some people did not want me in a theme position you know and okay you already got the dean position but we’re gonna control the votes it was one of that
Kind of situation I didn’t think too much of it because I did not think that people or people that I would call my sisters would plot against me because when I’m looking at girls to bring into the orc it’s not about me it’s about who’s gonna make the organ good but
Y’all so jealous of me being me and me having a title and me being a position that y’all said but now you got stuck with those girls I’m listen I’m I’m free I’m doing me y’all stuck with them girls okay because I wanted them so bad and this is
No shade this is no shade but they were not my picks there were not not one girl on that line was my pick but I was already in the position first of all with that position if not me then who secondly I wanted to be in a leadership position because I wanted to
Practice my leadership skills was I the best leader no I was not the best leader because that was my first time in a leadership position and I will take you know accountability and say that I was not the best leader my time management sucked how I talked to the girls were
Not in the best Manner and I can’t remember other things but I just knew my time management sucked I was late to everything okay and it’s hard to work with people that you letting you know that what I lacked and I also had to reflect back on that
Because I know that I’m gonna be a boss I’m already a boss but I know that one day when I have a team who works for me I need to learn from my mistakes on how I treated those girls so I don’t treat my team like that so I have no issues
Taking accountability because I feel like accountability makes us grow makes us wise and makes us better people I was saying that I had some great memories I had some great times I did not get to spend a lot of time with the girls that crossed in 2019 because shortly after
Then my mental health went downhill I feel like what happened after overshadowed the good moments that I had in the organization while I was in the org I was not one of the girls who partied a lot like rarely would you ever see me at a Greek event would you see me
At somebody campus and granted I can’t dance I cannot dance and you was never really ever going to catch me stroll okay you would never see me doing the greeky activities I just feel like it was kind of cringy anyways because listen it’s kind of cringy when you’re
At brunch and you’re trying to do Greek strolls at brunch we’re at a restaurant you’re trying to stroll that’s cringy and I was already somebody who didn’t need letters to become who they wanted to become I was already that girl before I got the letters but you know when somebody
Doesn’t have like a reputation or somebody is not really that person before letters they get kind of cringy when they get the letters I was already lit like you know I did not need the letters for me to be lit I already told y’all why I was interested in joining but the letters
Did not change me at all like it did not change me it did not make me any cringier it didn’t make me mean it didn’t make me any kind of way like I was still me after the letters before I get into why I decided to denounce my
Letters I want to say that I do not regret my decision in joining the organization because I feel like everything happens for a reason and I learned so much about myself I learned so much about being in an organization on so much about being around other
People I just learned so much about life that I would have not learned if I did not join the organization so I do not regret joining when you have the opportunity to join an organization you’re so excited that you’re not gonna sit there and do the necessary the real deep
Research that you need to do before you join this organization and I feel like when people hear like oh people join an organization and then denounce you do not believe what they’re saying understand like I understand before we was about to come into the org my ex-sisters were put on people’s
Denouncing videos and they will sit around and laugh at people laugh at people who denounce their letters as somebody who was sitting there watching the videos I’m not going to say that I did not believe the reason why people would denounce because it’s a lifelong commitment but I also never thought that
I would be you know making this video as to why I denounced I never thought that would be in this position I noticed that majority of the girls who joined this Sisterhood did not have sisters in real life and coming from somebody who has sisters in real life not one but many
Sisters in real life it’s not all peaches and cream all the time having sisters is dealing with so many personalities so many emotions and I feel like people who don’t have sisters in real life don’t understand what it really means to be a sister
And I’m not saying that to say that I am the perfect sister because I am not the perfect sister they took this one line one mind to they they ran it through the mud like they felt like because we was one line we got to have one mind and that was
Something that was hard for me to get used to or just to or accept because I have a twin in real life me and my twin are not one one one egg one mind We’re not gonna be one line with mine somebody who’s a twin I fought for my own
Separate identity for years I’m not going to join an organization and then lose the identity that I fought for and they just could not respect it I can admit that at that time in my life 2018 26 2019 it was all about me and it’s still all about me that’s why I choose
Not to have friends I choose to have people from a distance because I like it this way I feel like my life is where it needs to be because I’m all about me I cannot be all about me and all about you at the same time and be focused about
Where I’m trying to head you know what I’m trying to say and I’m real like some people will not be real about that like some people would be all about them and still have people around them like I’m just gonna be honest and say I’m all about me if something happens I’m gonna
Put myself first and you should too I also feel like I had to be selfish because I’ve never been in a position where somebody has chosen me or put me first so it was always like I have to put myself first because if I didn’t put myself first nobody was coming to save
Me nobody was coming to put me for nobody was coming to choose me so I always had to choose myself I was very quiet about my moves I moved in silence we would go somewhere like maybe to DC for the weekend or something like that I
Would always get my own hotel room and I’m still like that to this day like I want to do my own thing like we can go have fun but at the end of the day I do not want to share a room with you I
Don’t want to share a bed with you I don’t want to do low budget not saying that I haven’t but those experiences is the reason why I don’t like doing no budget and I always moved in silence because I don’t know what people’s intentions are I’m not
Gonna come sit here and tell you my business and then two days later the business doesn’t go as planned because you secretly are jealous or you secretly are hated not saying that you you are but things like that happen in real life so that’s why I’m very secretive and
Private about what I have going on until it manifests into reality and I feel like if you are somebody who has something going on you would definitely respect that and you would understand why I moved the way that I just want you to understand from both perspective from
My perspective and from maybe how they feel that’s why I’m being honest about who I am as a person I’m not going to sit here and paint the bad picture on other people no I’m gonna tell y’all what role I played in it and the role
Was being myself so now we’re going to get into the part as to why I denounced my letters in 2019 shortly after the girls crossed um my mental health went downhill like downhill I was not the same person I was literally fighting for my mental health
And during that time I was praying to God I was so desperate I’m like God like what is going on and another thing is that I have reached out to these girls because we had and I reached out to my existers in the group chat because I never expressed my feelings I never
Expressed my emotions I hope everything end because it’s always been me versus me so that’s how I know how to deal with my issues but this one time they always used to fuss on me all like oh you never tell us what’s going on you always
Secretive X1 and these so I said okay you know what let me reach out to this group chat and tell them like you know girls like um I need some words of encouragement words of motivations because I’m just really going through it right now why nobody responded in the
Group chat and when they did respond it was towards something totally different I was like all right back that was the beginning of the end for me that was the beginning of the end for me y’all act like y’all didn’t see my message but y’all talking about something totally different that’s noted
Like there’s nothing that you can say to justify that behavior like there’s nothing to justify that so like I said I was fighting for my mental health and I prayed to God and I was like God what do I have to do like what am I doing wrong
What is happening I was talking to God and I asked God to remove the infamous prayer that you don’t want to pray if you are not ready for God to show you what the hell needs to be what the hell and who the hell needs to be removed because it’s always
The people that you don’t expect so God was telling me that I needed to leave the sorority but even before that my mom was so fed up with me in the sorority because she felt like it was changing me or turning me into a whole different person because I was in a deep
Position I was barely home I was always at like in and out the house in and out the house out late coming in in the early mornings if somebody had an event I have to be there like it was just taking like it was just taking over my
Whole life and my mom was fed up she was like what the hell is this that you are going above and beyond for and my mom is African so you already know they don’t understand this Greek stuff so my mom was already fed up she’d been telling me
To leave this organization but I’m like nah you don’t know this and that I’m over here defending it like no girl like this is what I gotta do so I mean a man and I had on my Greek hoodie or whatever and a man looked at me and he said why
Do you have that on and I’m like I’m like what you mean why I have this on and he was like why you have that on you’re not Greek you’re African I had to let that simmer in my mind a little bit because that was God confirming indirectly what
He had asked me to do I asked for clarification I’m like what you mean he was like oh your lineage is African not Greek why are you studying Greek history studying like that has nothing to do with you basically when God had originally told me that I need to
Denounce my letters I was really scared to do what he asked me to do because I did not want to be judged I knew that this was a lifetime commitment I did not want to be the person that we laughed at and I’m gonna say we even
Though I didn’t laugh but we was all sitting there watching People’s denouncing videos laughing like oh God told me to you know denounce my letters when it’s true like and it’s true because you have to pick a side joining an organization is not of God
It is not of God and I don’t want to get too deep into it because it’s that deserves a whole nother video and there’s other people who speak on it but it’s truly not of God I thought I received that confirmation or whatever my mom God this man I’m not okay you
Know what I’m just going to you know denounce my letters I didn’t ask my letters twice the first time I was like yeah like I’m just gonna denounce it which I did they said I put them in an uproar like they could not believe I was
Doing this they felt like I was selfish because I was not thinking about the other girls that this was a lifetime commitment X Y and Z but when I had the announce I’m thinking because you love me and you think I’m your sister x y z you was going to support my decision
They gaslighted me so bad that I thought that I made the wrong decision so I came back I’m like nah I think I made a mistake I don’t want to denounce my letters no more I still want to be a part of the organization when I tell you
How they treated me after that was very disgusting and very nasty I would never forget and forgive how nasty those girls got and it’s like y’all have the audacity to get nasty with a person like me okay and now God is going to show you why you should have had great outcasting
Me it just was very nasty very mean girl and it’s like if you want to be a mean girl you got to give mean girl like look wise yeah don’t give that to be me it was just very nasty like the way they outcasted me and
Just made me feel like I was below them because I decided that I wanted to come back because like I said they had gaslighting me so bad that I feel like I made the wrong decision I felt like I was going above and beyond to get their
Love back and their attention back you know because they gaslighted me that bad and like I said the beginning of the end for me was when I had reached out to them for just words of encouragement and they couldn’t even give me that so for me to be going above and beyond for
People who show that they truly did not like me and did not care for me that was kind of crazy that happened in 2020 and then I think later on in a couple of months I’m like you know what I’m done with this like yeah can go to
Hell no I’m Really Gonna denounce my letters and x minus y’all kiss my ass and that’s when I have made that video but I was so heated I deleted that video because I feel like it was not a good representation of me and my emotions like I was just you know very
Heated I needed to heal after that whole situation because not only did I denounce my letters I cut my personal friends off because God when I tell you when you asked God to show you who your enemies is your enemies is never people from a distance it’s always people close
To you so I had just had to cut off my my close friends cut off my my existers just I lost so much people that I needed to heal from that because God was showing me things that was discussed and gotten behind my back and Not only was
He telling me he was bringing people to me and telling me what was really going on behind my back and within the organization I’m not even getting too deep because I feel like this video is already going to be long I didn’t even get to the point where the girls in the
Organization’s friends was telling me what was going on behind closed doors because they were still sharing rooms with gdis and they were so sloppy just sitting there having me in running their big old mouth in front of people who was sitting there listening to hear what was
Being said that and when I had the announce these girls came to me it was literally confirming everything that God has showed me so I’m like wow that’s really crazy do not ask God to show you who your enemies are until you are ready for that because listen betrayal is the
Worst kind of pain that you would ever feel like I don’t think there’s nothing in this world that has topped the Betrayal that I’ve been through because I’m a real ass person I have an issue with you I’m gonna come see your face and tell you if I don’t like something
About you I’m gonna come to your face and tell you I’m never gonna do no funny style behind your back so I would have never expected people to do funny stuff plotting against me behind me but I would have never imagined that but that’s what was being done behind my
Back and it just hurt so bad like so bad like I was already mentally fighting for my mental health but that just knocked me down okay I thought that they were going to still expect the decision that I have made because if you love somebody so much you are going to respect the
Decision that they made whether or not it benefits you I saw a side to them that was honestly truly very disgusting and it’s something that I cannot get out of my head even years past even no matter how how much healing I do it’s an image that I can
Never get out of my head like it was just so disgusting y’all sit there you’re happy about mental health you have events about all these things that people go through in real life I put somebody in front of y’all who’s going through the things that y’all preach
About that y’all have events about and y’all had no Grace that’s disgusting even while I was in an organization I was all about God but God was trying to show me that I cannot worship Him and worship a difference and that’s all I’m gonna say do your research like you
Don’t just join an organization and think oh yeah just a Sisterhood it’s a whole ritual ceremony that you have to go through but because we were so hyped or because I was so hyped to just finally make it to the end you don’t pay attention to a lot of the things that is
Going on you’re just ready to come out when I had the announcement letters for the second time which was the final time in real time I did struggle a bit but while I was struggling that was God breaking me down to build me back into this person that is sitting in this
Today and that is why I do not regret my process I learned so much like I learned so much about myself I learned so much about this world I was very naive I thought that there was no bad in this world I thought that there was no evil
And that nobody could ever do me wrong but God showed me so much to prepare me for this next chapter that I am in right now while my mental health was shitty the only people who was really there for me were my blood sisters and my family
And that showed me that you really cannot pay or you cannot teach anybody how to be a sister because it’s just something that comes natural to you I was so traumatized by what happened to me what God has shown me that I was closed off to meeting new people to meeting new
Friends like I was just closed off from people Point Blank pray because I’m like if that’s what people who say that they love you can do to you okay just do to me they can do way worse okay so I was just very traumatized and I just closed
Myself off and when I started healing I was able to open myself back up to people and understanding who I am as a person and what I want out of friendships and relationships moving forward so anyone interested in joining a Greek organization this is my honest
Advice talk to God pray to God because what works for me may not work for you and what works for you may not work for me just because me being a part of this organization did not work out for me does not mean that it’s not going to
Work out for you we all have different paths and different Journeys that we have to go through and experience in life and what works for me or what didn’t work for me may work for you so talk to God don’t let this video be like
Oh I’m not going to join X Y and Z I feel like you know that’s a decision that you and God need to make on your own time my next advice is to not force yourself into spaces where you’re not wanted if you go to a meeting or you go
To an event who’s about organization and they’re very nasty to you they’re not welcoming you do not need to go back stop trying to force your way into these organizations because nine times out of 10 they already have a list of who they want what they want and you should not
Want to join anything that does not treat you how you deserve to be treated don’t let Nobody’s raggedy-ass Child try to treat you less than you really are because it’s not that serious like honestly it’s not that serious and my last advice I think is dumb to let people
Give you a process I think it’s dumb I think it’s done because I feel like the only person who should be breaking you down to build you back up is God like when God breaks you down he’s building you back up on a sturdy Foundation when
You let somebody break you down to build you back up they’re not building you back up on a sturdy Foundation don’t let anybody allow your mental health to deteriorate and don’t let anybody run your pockets dry these are all advices that I would give to anybody who is
Looking to join the org you do with that as you please next will be my personal takeaways from being a part of this organization while I was healing I had to sit back and reflect back on the roles that I had to play I’ve mentioned several times that I’m not a perfect
Person we’re not all perfect and I will never tell a story to make me sound like I’m a good person to anybody who wants to enter my life I always let it be known that I put myself first and you should too you should never enter a relationship and put somebody else
Before you I learned to stand on my likes and dislikes if I want to do something I’m gonna do it if I don’t want to do it I’m not going to do it I like something I like if I don’t I don’t that’s just what it is and I’m not going
To allow anybody to guess like me and to thinking that I do not deserve to put myself first when you are around weak-minded people who want you to follow the crowd it can rob people off the wrong way when you think and act like me and now that I know that I don’t
Put myself in situations like that where people expect me to follow the crowd I want to do what I want to do how I want to do it when I want to do it I learned what I’m willing to tolerate and what I’m not willing to tolerate in this
World and my relationships with people and just anything in general I learned to choose me because if I allow anybody to choose me or anybody to you know come and save me nobody’s coming and I understand why it’s easier to not choose me I totally get it so it’s not no
Personal thing but I’ve been put in situations where I wanted somebody to choose me and I was never Chosen and that had nothing to do with me that was not a reflection of me and I had to learn that like that’s not a reflection
Of me and it has nothing to do with me it’s easier for somebody to choose somebody less than me I mentioned how my experience within this organization traumatized me from just meeting people and just being in relationships with people but I am not close to friendships I’m not close to meeting new people
Um I just have to use my discernment to pick and choose who I allow into my personal space if anybody knows me in real life I’m A vibe like I’m A vibe I love people I treat people with respect I make people laugh I’m good energy and
I feel like it’s it’s not fair to me to hold that back because of what happened to me in the past I feel like what happened to me in the past within my relationships was to teach me how to have this sermon and to have standards and boundaries for people
That I allow into my space I’m not willing to settle for friendships unless I know that you are a part of my soul tribe and until I know that you are a part of my soul tribe I’m going to love you from a distance I’m not a mean girl
I’m not nasty I’m always smiling I’m always if I I’m easier to talk to but it’s easier for me to keep people at a distance I don’t know how long this video is but I’m just gonna end it here because I can honestly speak about this
For days I just spoke about things other than God telling me to denounce I told y’all what encouraged me to want to leave this organization because I’m not going to fake the funk I’m not going to be fixed to people I’m not going to sit and smiling people’s
Face when I know that they don’t like me I’m not going to do any that on top of that I’m not going to pay dudes or organizations who don’t even respect me as a person like that’s just really crazy you’re sitting around people who don’t even like each other but to the
World they have to portray that we have this United Sisterhood and there was no United Sisterhood I cannot speak for all of the organizations I’m only speaking for my experience you either get it or you don’t like my experience is not up for debate it’s not up for a discussion
I don’t care how anybody feels about what I went through I don’t care how nobody feels about that if you are part of an organization and you had a great experience I’m happy for you Bravo I’m glad that you had the experience that you wanted I did it and your experience
Or your feeling does not change what I experience I also want to make it clear that when you decide to denounce your letters it’s not peaches and cream it’s not peaches and cream because you sign the oath to a whole different okay do your research so when I say I lost a
Lot I lost a lot but I’m sitting here and I need for nothing I need for nothing because I held on to God and I did not let God go even when I was going through my trials and my tribulations I knew that it was for a bigger purpose
And I knew that this was my real process to enter into the kingdom of God and I’m just like like look at me like this is what it looks like when God is giving you his life this is what it looks like when God has breaking you
Down to build you Back Up In His Image this is what it looks like I can show you what I looked like three years ago dry and skinny I’m sickly looking okay so believe me when I say that God is good if you already lit like me if you
Already that girl if you already had clout you don’t need to join an organization join an organization is for people who are nobodies people who name don’t ring bells like they need that but if your names already ring bells you don’t need letters to justify that
You’re that girl or to to make you bigger than what you already are you don’t need it I just want to thank God because when everybody comes to me out God never counted me out I thank God for the strength and the confidence that he has given me throughout my
Process with him that has made me who I am today that has given me the power to influence motivate and encourage people to be their best self and God is too good okay I also want to make it clear that you cannot say that you love God and you worship God and you
Believe in god without going through a process with him you know I feel like people lose faith when God starts to test them you can’t lose Faith you gotta stand ten toes down okay and just know that what awaits you on that other side of standing ten toes down is beautiful like me
[Laughter] I’m so serious I hope you girls take something away from this video and I’ll see you guys in my next video
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