[Applause] My Three Sons starring Fred McMurray and it’s bub William Fry it’s getting so you can’t tell when dinner is over around here I’m still hungry yeah well from the looks of things you’re going to be 8 F 11 and weigh 900 lb you’re welcome have a banana no thanks Bu you’re welcome thanks bub boy my well Nally
It’s been nearly 20 minutes since you drank that last quart of milk must be the ham we have for din toight yes I suppose you want another cup of coffee no I don’t believe so bub I think I’ll have a cup of tea oh thank you oh Mike you staying in tonight no
I’m going out later you still rushing in for that fraternity yeah don’t worry you’ll make it Rob it’s nice to see you doing your homework instead of looking at TV for a change there’s nothing good on right now dad oh well Seer is just over what are you all doing back here
Now there’s nothing good on well Z and I have been divorced so if you’re going to make any more mess around here you’ll have to clean it up yourselves okay all right hey PP what was in that package you got today what package oh my gosh I
Forgot to tell you Bob the delivery truck drove up just as I was coming home from school this afternoon what did you do with the package where is it I’ll get it I went right up to my room and just playing forgot all about it BB I’m sorry
That’s all right as long as I got here on time you what is what is it bub will you see what it is bub boy sure’s big it’s not even your birthday this is better than any old birthday where do you see it hey just get a load of
This you going to be a bull figher bu no it’s part of my large uniform make you let the boys in on the good news bub oh I don’t want to bre egg I’m sure they’d like to know that their granddad has been made a high ranking officer in a National Organization no
Kidding yeah yeah and the Brotherhood of Cavaliers made me dartanion of the East door and tomorrow night I’m going to be installed AAS officer in the lodge isn’t it bu what do you think of your grandfather now well well I bet there not too many fellas that have a grandfather like you
Have well that’s uh just about what I was going to say Well it it took a little time but I finally made it Jeepers Bob you’re going to look just like Zoro you bet you chip and way do you get a load of my official dartanion headgear ostrich feathers on a field of
Vellum and if you want to hang around here for about an hour or so I’ll go and put on the whole outfit and show it to you good right hey Dad can I uh talk to you for a minute sure in here all right boy I’d
Sure like to go to one of Bob’s l meeting on these times yeah I’ll bet you maybe you can get dartan to take it some night yeah but why does he have to pick tonight to go parading around in this ridiculous outfit what’s the special about tonight
Matee well a couple of the guys are coming over to meet me well let’s face it if he walks out here and that get him they’ll think it’s the the changing of the guards or something how long have you known these fellas Mike what since my first day at
School oh matter of a few weeks huh and you’re uh worried about what these fellas who you only known for a few weeks are going to think about your granddad whom you’ve known all your life H oh come on dad you know what I mean the guys just aren’t going to
Understand well you handle it any way you like Mike just be sure and don’t hurt your granddad’s feelings well sure I’m going up and do a little work now when your granddad gets his uniform I’m tell him to come up and show it to me will you
Okay B in his room oh yeah he’s in there ironing that Zoro suit of his and Chip’s watching it listen rob a couple of the fellas from school are coming oh my gosh they here keep up out of sight until we leave huh no the drage was down so we just let
Ourselves in greetings Sigma gamma K to be won’t be long now H fellas well uh I’m all set should we go what your hurry we’re early yeah besides I got to use your phone Elsie gets positively panicky whenever she knows she’s going to have to do without me for a whole evening
Hello oh hello Mrs Stans may I speak to Elsie please oh okay it wasn’t too important anyway uh she was taking a bath okay okay so she got so panicky that she had to go to a movie with a girlfriend named George okay come on let’s go hey wait a minute
What’s the rush I need refueling what do you got to eat yeah man show me that kitchen you know food is the one thing that can cure a broken heart well what’s the matter with you guys didn’t he eat dinner well sure but that was almost an
Hour ago well uh I’ll tell you what uh we can stop on the way and pick up a hot dog or something huh boy Douglas you’re not exactly the hospitable type are you well that’s not it it’s just that well we just don’t have happened to have
A decent thing in the house to eat I mean nobody’s done the shopping for this week hi you know uh that does not exactly look like K Robbie what are you doing here um I’m going to London to visit the king it’s my brother Robbie hi you guys
Hi you know kid that looks like a pretty good piece of cake oh yeah and there’s plenty more bub just baked one today forgot well anyway Bub’s still in his room Mike oh see you later Mike Bo that’s wow where are you going oh I’m hungry well there’s an apple in the ice box hey how about if I treat both you guys to a mall huh how come well because I I just want to get going I’m kind of nervous about this
Fraternity bit aren’t you well yeah but uh that’s why I got to eat something come on Doug we’ll stop and get a Mt and a hot dog well that’s Fine hi My good thumb too well I I told you I I just want to get going one God ca ca that’s Arabian it means if you find oil remember the Pasha retains all mineral R well Mike don’t just stand there introduce me to these friends of yours oh Doug and Marty that’s my grandfather
Gentlemen now boys uh I want to give you a sort of a little dress rehearsal of what’s going to happen to me tomorrow night we March around the lodge Hall and while marching we sing The Lodge song thle We Are The Musketeers we are the cers blood and sweat and tears we are
One son of a gun we’re one E easto I vow to protect thee with my life Victoria Excel we are the Musketeers we are the t is True Blood and sweat and tears we are one son of a gun we are one son of a gun we are One and then he says Salah Salah and waves his stupid sword around like he’s flipped well you should have seen Doug Marty they thought he was going to take out their appendix or something mik in spite of all the dramatics and all the exaggerating all you’ve said to me is
That a couple of your friend saw your granddad in his lodge uniform oh come on dad look I’m not so old that I can’t remember how how easy it is to get embarrassed at a lot of things at your age but believe me you’ll get over it
You’ll laugh about it later dad have you seen that stupid hat with the feathers sure I’ve seen it bub thinks it’s pretty snazzy and if bub likes it I like it Mike you know his uh installation as an officer tomorrow night is very important to him dartan of the East
Door would you got to have little green men running around your bloodstream to think that’s M well all right I’m trying to get into a fraternity tomorrow night I think that’s pretty important too I respect that Mike just the same as I respect what bub is doing I don’t want bub hurt
Mike and I don’t think you do you there of course I don’t all right Then Dad h couldn’t you just get him to hide that Hat what are you going to do with the meat tonight well I’m afraid I can’t tell you chip it’s a secret do you slice each other up with the swords slice each other up with the swords but this is a lodge not a delicate essent swallow swallow what
Swords oh we haven’t tried that yet now the Hat no no no don’t horse around with that Bonnet it’s all right with me but I’m afraid dartanion of the East door might be a little R look all right okay you sure are going through a lot of
Trouble to get in with a bunch of guys you wouldn’t Catch Me dressed up like that for anybody but a girl well that’s one reason for being in a fraternity girls really go for that jazz hey Rob yeah you want these ties well sure thanks a lot Mike how come
Well they’re all too wide I mean they’re okay for high school but not quite the thing for college brother used to throw a fit if I even borrowed one of your ties well I wish younger had more immature in those days are you sure were hey you can’t have this tie why not
You just gave it to me well I didn’t mean to give you this word sure glad you went to college and grew up Rob yeah what uh what was bub doing when you came upstairs he was in his room I guess he was getting ready to go
To his lodge meeting oh my gosh well what’s the matter I got to meet those guys at the front door they’re not going to see bub and his Superman outfit again how come they have to come over here to meet you I’m know one with a car
Hello hey what are you doing home I want to get going sa sa that’s Arabian it means uh don’t flip your bero well look I I’ll be right over and pick you guys up oh no no no that’s okay we’ll be right there uh tell me it’s
Okay if I bring Allan Frank and Philly isn’t it you know I mean they’ve never seen a real live dartanion before okay now Chip you V off to bed and tomorrow I’ll tell you all about my big night I thought you supposed to keep everything a secret well I am but I got
A hunch I’m going to be so excited I won’t be able to keep my big mouth shut now I got to call up old Max and Smitty they promised to pick me up here tonight and I want to make sure they’re not going to be late here take this up with
You okay have a nice time I’m going to try thanks okay so long we’ll see you a little later no I’ll pick you up don’t you think you guys are pushing this thing a little too far I mean what’s so great about seeing an old man parade
Around in a Halloween suit and Yankee Doodle hat well sure hey you you know you want to sell tickets if you think it’s laughs to see my grandfather embarrass me fine but we went that route last night let’s uh skip the Repeat Performance huh you silly old
Fool okay okay okay where is he where is he where come on now you guys this this whole bit’s getting pretty silly isn’t it oh don’t be a goof off Douglas these guys are entitled to one shot of your grandfather in a lady’s hat look you
Guys know all about it now the joke’s all over huh excuse me [Applause] we for dartan our no leader is uh what you more case here on k um yeah oh come in Bob sh yeah great great but uh let’s knock it off and get out of here will you it is
Our honor to escort you to our meeting place oh exalted night of our Brotherhood yeah yeah but let’s get going all cease and desist brother dartanion must be in full plumage this is a glorious moment in the proud history of the Cavaliers oh cut it
Out will you SMY cut it out uh I’ll tell you what we do let’s let’s call off the rest of the ceremony Well I uh didn’t know you were all in there um Dad these are some of the guys from school hello fellas Mike’s grandfather’s being uh made an officer of his lodge tonight that was uh his uniform yes sir looks very good on him the feathers in the cave that’s a sort
Of tradition like the carabini area in Italy we understand sir well I I guess we better be going yeah come on oh yeah that’s right well lots of luck m well I guess your friends didn’t think your granddad looked so terrible did they oh come on dad they’re waiting out
There right now to give me the business oh well Mike if you’d stick up for your granddad instead of being embarrassed and ashamed of him maybe your friends wouldn’t get such a kick out of making fun of him well I’ll tell you one thing bub is never going to embarrass me like this
Again even if I have to move into the fraternity house for good good night Dad Fish fish fish fish get your fresh fish fish fish fish fish f fish fish fish fish louder fish fish fish get your fish here here fishy fishy here fishy fishy fish you want a trade jobs no thanks here fishy fishy boy you wouldn’t think a fraternity subjected members to ridicule
Like this would you fish fish fish fish the ridicule I don’t mind only the nose is offended fish fish fish yeah relax will you so far we’re lucky they haven’t asked us to eat any of them yet I don’t know which would be worse eating a live goldfish or or a mackerel
Has been dead for 6 months fish fish fish fish here fish fish F I just wish I hadn’t eaten that banana split on you’re making me sick Douglas fish Douglas stand up yes sir Douglas what’s the matter with you have you decided you
Don’t want to be a sigma gam oh no sir I I mean yes sir well yes Mr Wilson I’m sorry F fish f f f hi Dad hello Mike well how did your evening go oh fine was one of those open air things you know Bob isn’t home from his meeting
Yet by the way uh did you catch anything what do you mean you know I I thought I knew all the good fishing spots around here but uh I I didn’t know it was any good in front of M’s drugstore uh but a college man like yourself wouldn’t be sitting there just
To make himself look ridiculous would he hey how’d you find out about that I uh ran out of pipe tobacco so I walked downtown to get some I saw you well it was part of our hazing you must uh want to get into that fraternity pretty badly Mike well sure I
Do you know that I just thought when you found out you had to do ridiculous things like you did tonight you might have changed your mind no well it was kind of embarrassing for a while but oh we had some good laughs besides it’s it’s not as bad as it seems
When you’re not the only one who’s doing ridiculous things I want to tell you Mike I got away from there as fast as I could why well you can imagine how I felt seeing my oldest son sitting there on a curb with a Simple Simon outfit fishing in the
Gutter what if some of my friends had come along or some of my business associates you of all people can understand how I must have felt but Dad it was part of a oh there’s a message there yeah there’s a message there yeah well it isn’t the
Same thing I was being initiated bub was parading around here well it is the same thing isn’t it that’s right well I thought I’d stay up and see how everything went with bub but I don’t think I’m going to make it you better get toed bed too yeah well uh dad I uh
I’m not very tired I guess I’ll stay up a while alline good night mik good night D Mike why don’t you go and sleep in your bed where you belong I was uh waiting up for you oh I see you figured I might get arrested running through the streets in this outfit huh well if they didn’t arrest me doing what I was doing tonight then you don’t have
To worry well what were you doing I was fishing in front of Miller’s drugstore it was was part of my initiation for the fraternity you should have seen me I had tails on and and tights and tennis shoes and and a tall hat with Plumes I’m glad you didn’t see me you’d have been embarrassed the important thing is did you have any fun sure did did did you I sure did I’ll tell you what we do suppose we go and fortify ourselves with a good slug of milk and then we can get ready
For our next Suare okay good say what was that song your your Lodge brothers were singing a Musketeers we are the musers we are the C blood and we are the son of a Gun La [Applause] A
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