I’m just I’m Just I’m just I’m just Something I know it took me some time to get to the place that you wanted me to be I know it was never you I just needed to work on me but now I’m ready I’m ready to love oh hey guys welcome to little black B night one we are here sitting down with
Damonte from ready to love this recent season yes he was the first to go unfortunately on the first night but he’s going going to give us his particular journey and his experience on ready to love and as always I want you guys to keep it classy keep it cute and
Uh keep it uh kosher in the chat as well and don’t forget make sure you like share and subscribe to the channel he has told me to tell you guys disclaimer please his smoke alarm is smoking it’s just suddenly gone off so we have to
Give him some Grace so if you do hear a beep in the background it is not a beep test for you to start running it is his smoke on alarm so disclaimer put there ahead of himself Damonte how you doing today Captain brother I am great thank you for the opportunity man appreciate
You not a problem at all Captain you know what I mean it’s good to have you on board and I hope we’re going to have one of those great amazing conversations going forward today as well but before we do listen I like to do something that we call human verification some H baby
Okay you want to make sure that you actually are a human being you know what I’m saying to you so listen because you could easily be AI you know what I mean so we we definitely want to want to chop it up right with you first and foremost so my first question for
You is if you had a plane um and it can land anywhere in any country of your choice where would you want that plane to land I’ve always wanted to go to like San Lucia Grenada um over there in the in the island when I was in college I went to
Uh college with the people from from the Caribbeans have some beautiful personalities man so I always wanted to kind of dip in there and see what’s going on over there okay love it okay cool love it Caribbeans um and uh I mean you you’ve been before I’m guessing you’ve been no
I have never gone that’s one place I always wanted to go so D and Jamaica honest D and Jama listen I was there this earlier this last month no last year I was there with a couple of guys and it was a really good time I can’t
Lie to you so maybe if we uh go again we’ll invite you C make sure you get you out there absolutely man I appreciate you no way cap uh second question for human verification is uh F favorite flavor ice cream cookus and cream cookies and cream is my favorite ice
Cream I would I would go down on a paint of ice cream after I done worked out and kill it at 11 o’clock at night I’m with you on that one brother with you is that particular brand is that particular brand blue bear blue bear got to go with blue you know the
Older you get you can’t eat every ice cream man yeah listen the lactose and be not be tolerant you hear me it be you in the toilet for a little while so yeah as soon as you get hey man as soon as you get ready to go you hit
That D hand to somebody like oh [ __ ] you got to go you go running you hold you go hold yeah so I hear you on that one still uh third question um uh if you had one last meal that you could eat what would that last meal be so the
Last meal that you could ever eat what would well because I’m a faith believer in regards to last meal I put would I wouldn’t put it on my last meal but I put it as my favorite meal I would probably say some L chops lamb chops or either steak potatoes with some
Asparagus and garlic toast oh okay all right cool I hear it Grill it’s fashionable okay I with it brother you said you going to get a high class uhhuh he I’m not mad at I’m not mad at all well and my final question in human verification um is cereal or the milk in
The bowl first cereal golden chis cereal Golden Chris can’t get enough of those good in Chris hey man listen I’m with it I’m with it don’t worry and I’m lacking the energy as well too all right listen you passed human verification baby okay that means we going to get deeper into some
Conversation okay we going to go a little bit deeper all right so listen again for those of you who just joined us at all his members the Monte was a part of ready to love um this recent season um that is in for love worth I
Think it is um and uh we we we got to see him on the very first episode and so we’re looking to chop it up with him and just get to know him a bit better outside of the show first and then know about his experience on the show as
Always keep it class keep it cutie keep a kosher in the chat as well make sure you’re liking you’re sharing and you are subscribing so uh you know Damonte you know before obviously ready to love you are your own entity as well want to know
What is Damonte story um you know who is D Monte and what is D Monte story man appreciate your opportunity on that man I am a brother from born and raised from Dallas Texas um 43 years old be 44 this year single uh no kids worked in the mortgage industry for 13 years
And I got to get this disclaimer R my smoke detector is going off but uh but no I am uh I worked in the morex industry before I started my own business um five years ago um I’m just a hardworking Brother played football ran track play the
MSU um I’m inan a forat turn I’m remember of 5 Beta Sigma fraternity Incorporated okay play springo one um I started this business called Elemental style got tired of a they always say once you when you’re a great leader you always been up on a great leadership so
Uh right before the pandemic had hit a lot of people say man you should start your own business I had always had an eye for fashion so I did my I started my business in 2018 uh 2019 I did my first fashion show at antique furnit shop um
It sold out within two months then my second fashion show that’s when Co first hit that was in 2019 that sold out as well need to summarize it um I did eight soldout fashion shows in Dallas Texas during the pandemic it was a blessing I taught myself how to do photography
Taught myself how to do videography um I’m a published book author as well that you can get the book on Amazon don’t be afraid to show the word your sign signature look um let me see I’m an educator as well I teach middle school kids so my patients have actually grown
Um you know I have a lot of little nieces a lot of little nephews that I have to uh build up every day so I love working with the kids a lot of times people don’t say man kid these kids nowadays is totally different I love working with kids because you they deal
With so much stuff that we haven’t dealt with or we haven’t saw so working with kids being an educator is actually fun um I’m actually getting ready for New York Fashion Week uh this next this Sunday I leave out I’m a designer as well so this is the first time I’ll be a
Part of New York Fashion Week and I’m just blessed man so I’ve gotten to this point through hard work and just you know branding myself and just doing a lot of content and learning that everybody is not going to understand what your fashion sense is and I had to be okay with
That totally understand that toally understand that wow I mean so obviously you know you had your own business that you I mean I guess you run some shows during Co a time where you know um businesses were shutting down you know and we weren’t sure how you know life
Was going to operate after that as well and I saw a post on your Instagram as well I think you had was that New York Fashion Week as well so you obviously accomplished in that area as well tell us a little bit maybe about how you
Began and what prompted you to go into into fashion and and what what’s inspiring you to get to that place man I got TI honestly bro I got tired of being laid off as a contractor when you were in mortgage industry you get tired of laying off you work your ass off two
Months three months uh company shut down because they losing files and so um during that period man I just kind of like man I got to figure this out I if I want to get married if I want to create this this uh this Empire
That I wanted to build I got to do what’s best for me so uh still working through in corporate doing cor corporate and establishing myself as a leader you know I’m a singer as well so I sing you know sing at church singing a pra SC so
I’ve learned you know to balance my faith and so when my faith was driving I said I got to figure this out so um I kind of I didn’t know anything about doing fashion shows I didn’t know anything about conducting me as a business entity uh I kind of learned it
On the flly I didn’t know anything about doing Productions I didn’t know anything about playwriting or because I wrote my own play and skits as well so I didn’t know anything about this this is selftaught through faith and just learning your craft and um through that man people start driving they start
Understanding like man this brother is really serious about what he do I’m from Oak Texas I’m from the hood seven of us in the one bedroom growing up my grny was the the candy house where all the dope dealers and everybody that was on the Trap they respected my grandmother
So when I have I have support from the hood I got support from the hood now it’s like hey we want to see you make it you know what I’m saying so that’s d right there you know we know where he come from you know my mom is a preacher
You know my grandfather was a bishop so I have all this this support but the same token I’m not perfect by any means so it just through my drive man just you know tired of being being laid off tired of being you know a pillar or a step
Stool for people and I said I got to figure this out so that’s what made me drive me to be who I am today man I love that man um you know that drive obviously as well is so important in it right because that’s what usually guides people to being
Successful um and going you know um above and beyond to that even that when it gets to a point where you know something like Co comes on you’re able to overcome so obviously you know for you in that space like you said you you have a lot of things going on
Right you have a lot of things that were going on a lot of things that were um you know a lot of jobs that you seem to be heavily in involved with uh as well you know fashion is something that is a is a creative thing so um you know
Sometimes people say that you know they have freedom from being able to create what does fashion mean to you well fashion means is you’re your own whatever’s in your head fashion is you whatever look that you have in your head whatever you envision you have to be
Confident of who you are first and that brings it to life I can put a really nice outfit on someone or client or a model or things of that sort but if they don’t have the confidence behind it that brings a whole different element so what
Fashion means to me is actually you have to be confident who youself who you are individually and then the fashion aspect will come to light so you know if you feeling like extra is one of you know rock a whole bunch of extravagant colors that’s solely how you feel today you
Know so fashion is you you know that’s that’s what makes fashion love that love that okay so you know obviously you know you’re in fashion now but when you were younger was that your dream were you want were you wanting to be in fashion or was there something else that Damonte had on
His mind as a young kid bro I was a athlete I ran track and played football for about 13 to 14 years I ran summer track to football the summer track to football so my whole thing is running a 438 as when I was in high school and you
Know first year in college I was like man I’m make it to the league I’m 510 I was probably at the time I was probably about 185 190 I’m you know I’m grown man weight now probably about 210 215 somewh up in there so the athleticism has always been there man so
When it CES to you know growing up as a kid I was just an athlete I’m like I’m going to make it you know what I’m saying so that’s where that came from wow okay so you was a into into track athlete yeah track play football play defensive back for Carter High
School and MSU so what was your was what was your discipline huh what was your discipline in track uh I ran the 4×4 man we ran I think the fastest ran was 313 and that was my junior that was my uh I think my fastest f was 485 so we was
Rolling man we was rolling okay he was bit mean still I like it um so so wait obviously you ran track did a bit of uh football as well why why not pursue those particular uh Arenas well I had Miss so the funny thing about my injury I missed on my
Knee yeah I had a I was hooping I wasn’t supposed be hooping doing the offseason Miss came down on a rebound playing intermal basketball and messed up my cruet you know what I’m saying you know the little ligament that’s right between your kneecap so this my lateral movement is
Shot I don’t have it the stability yeah that I could be walking or back and back and I bu and walk back the wrong way like what the hell it happens but I never had surgery on it too man so that that pretty much shot my my whole
Football career it’s crazy because I’m not going to lie to you listen only recently A couple of years ago that I did my um MCL you know not like a fullon but enough to say that you know what we ain’t playing ball again so I definitely hear what you’re
Saying try to do anything with it so I definitely I definitely definitely understand that as well um okay so obviously as a as a young person obviously like I said you had you know maybe a different particular Vision you know you were looking into sports and stuff and then you find yourself in
Fashion um tell us a little bit about your upbringing what is the you know what was Damonte like um you know growing up and and when up my God so I grew up my my single parent household my mom was a single parent um she she raised me I had a good person
That she she dated uh I transferred elementary schools like seven times uh I actually shared this story in my book and she don’t like every time I tell this story she get emotional about it my mom is a preacher and evangelist by the way and I got molested by my aunt who’s
Actually artistic and uh I didn’t start dealing with this till last year as a grown man and five I got molested at 5 years old so at 5 years old and I hit five years of my business and I had to understand why am I dealing with this
Now so it’s my eighth fashion show and my uh eighth month of my fashion show and it five years that that happened as a man in five years my fifth fast I mean my uh five year anniversary so I’m like God why am I dealing with all this stuff
These numbers start adding up and I had to put this stuff in perspective but because I had never addressed this at a man but now I’m like I got to start addressing this in case I want to get married and things of that sort so when
It comes to my healing Pro I never made myself vulnerable because I was reason I’m so protective of my business because I was violated in that area in my business is my baby and a lot of times people don’t understand your story until they start de diving right into the
Logistics of actually what happened you know what I’m saying so if that makes any sense so my upbringing was very good man a very good my mom always kept me on point but it was always those little small points that kind of like you just never addressed you knew some stuff went
On as the old you get you start understanding why you are the way you are damn that’s a heavy hit right there yeah D and it’s interesting that you mentioned obiously not really knowing and not really not really coming face to face with that knowledge of of that
Situation until a little bit later on in life where I’ve heard that once or twice happen before as well you know how how did you deal how did you process coming across the fact that you know that that had happened to you at such a young age but
No not knowing that until a much later space like how did you process that information it was weird because I start waking up in the middle of the night I start understanding like man something is off um I start being real Spacey I was really disconnected with the world
You know what I’m saying I was I was disconnected but I got more care creative if that makes any sense I go I went into a whole different Stratosphere as to who I am as a person and I knew the only way I can address these issues
Is I start having to meditate I start having to pray a lot more I had to start talking about it more the more I talked about it the more I started counseling myself talking to my friends and they was like man you need to really address
This you know you need to do this you need to write it down put it in a book or just talking about it amongst men and a lot of times as men we don’t never talk about childhood hurt which is very vital nowadays you know what I’m saying
Especially when you coming from when you grew up in the hood man that’s that that [ __ ] ain’t talked about man that’s that’s that’s frowned upon you don’t you keep it together you keep it moving but you don’t talk about you know you don’t put your family up under the bus and
Luckily I have a good mother and a Praying Mother that actually looked out for me and she actually when I talked about it she knew it happened but we never talked about it you know what I’m saying even now I still wrestle with it and I and my aunt I like damn can’t
Stand you know what I’m saying but it’s something I’m dealing with personally now so you know I’m pushing through it so what so what brought it up that that that you know you found out that information like was it just like a a Spur the moment kind of situation was it
Just a it was it was like an Untold secret because I told I talked to my sister and she’s like yeah D we kind of know and I talked to my cousin she said yeah why you think we stop you from coming around her why you think this
Happened why you think that happened it didn’t once those puzzle start being implemented it started making sense like oh [ __ ] that’s what that did happen dang so it was like a blur everything was a blur uh because I was always busy and then once I settled down and kind of
Understand who I was everything start being like clear as day like really is weird wow that is heavy that is heavy for you I mean obviously having to process that like I said obviously at a later stage it’s it’s it’s a it’s a different unique perspective Ive um I mean looking back
Do you feel like that affected maybe some Rel relationships that you were in whether it’s with family or with romantic relationships I think you probably did U reason why I say that because if you never address you know childhood hurt you never address you never understand how to love yourself
First and when it came to making yourself vulnerable that probably explains why I never had kids because it’s like oh this is real I probably pull out or something you know what I’m saying so when it comes to like making myself or establishing myself as a man I
Just never you never know what triggers what trigger you know what I’m saying even now I’m com maybe I need to get some counseling you know just for me because there’s probably some untacked uh things I still need to attack you know what I’m saying as far
As from I notice the older I gotten the more emotional I get which is weird like The Color Purple almost got me I hear you so uh just I’m still addressing those things I’m still learning about myself as a man so I don’t think it affected me because I I
Do know I do know the characteristics of what I can bring to the table but when it comes to myself opening up or expressing myself hey baby I love you hey baby I miss you hey or learning not to shut down when I get into show mode
Or production mode those are things I still need to learn how to compartm eyes and push forward with and that’s where I’m not perfect and the thing about uh where I’m now I have to have patience you know what I’m saying so man I I definitely love that as well
And I think it’s it’s such a you know I haven’t you know haven’t been through what you going say been through but definitely you know I can identify with the fact that you know when you said about go getting into work shutting down everything else and just kind of being
So focused on that goal or you know like you said not being as vulnerable I can definitely acknowledge that and really um sit with that as well and be like yeah me too I you know I had those struggles of wanting to be open being vulnerable cuz the fear of rejection the
Fear of you know um being seen and and being you know you know not liked and and stuff like that you know I mean you have those thoughts those feelings about not being accepted almost a sense right if you share your feelings or your thoughts um and that vulnerability so
Obviously being in relationships where you couldn’t necessarily share your vulnerability what was that like you know in terms of you being in relationship then because that’s a major component of a relationship man I think the crazy part about it if you don’t know me if you just coming off um it can
Come off as a little arrogant you know what I’m saying when not knowing the person uh who’s behind the suits or who’s behind the the beard or the tattoos there’s a lot more to the individual because once you start breaking down those layers I said I had
To dress up the pain until I was ready to heal meaning don’t get caught up in these this this facade of who I have to be who I need to be who I have to be when I go project there’s a man behind this thing I need you to see who I am
First and a lot of times women nowadays they get caught up in when you to I need to take this I want to go buy this bad ass drer yeah baby I can’t take you out eat cuz I got to go pay for this venue I got to go pay for this photography
Equipment there’s a lot of layers that comes with entrepreneur and a lot of times women don’t have the patience for it you know what I’m saying and that could be where I can just say hey just be patient with me just let me go through you know let me get through this
Week you know what I’m saying or let me get through this day you know what I’m saying because you know how it is when you you have to deal with a lot of different Spirits yourself and you have to learn how to facilitate and orchestrate okay I don’t know this person energy but
Here we go you know what I’m saying so you have to put yourself on you know gang face but it’s a lot that comes with it man and I think it has affected me but one thing I learned about Tyler Perry he said Sometimes you have in
Buster they said you have to be the most selfish the most arrogant person to be who you are and a lot of people ain’t gonna understand it but they gonna understand it and they G when they see it like oh damn we see right now so DN I definitely hear that as well
Definitely hear that um and that yeah that quote is obviously something I’ve come across as well before I mean obviously for you then um growing up you know like I said you you had your own Ambitions as a young kid but you know when you get to high school when you get
To University we tend to kind of form our identities in a different way tell us a little bit about your experience and you know tell us a little bit about your experience obviously going navigating high school and University what was that like for Damonte so I was always pretty much a um
I wouldn’t say popular kid but I was well I was known you know what I’m saying probably for you know D to my I have a sister you know she’s known as well we come you know we pretty much we’re people people uh so from a socialization standpoint and my sister
Being a Calo me playing sports we always has have people that you know kind of like us you know energy I’m a Goof Troop I be you know I could be doing something random and just make a funny voice or do some Brandon Mech or you know do
Something dumb and so just growing up in college I was always just a kid you know what I’m saying and like to have fun I was always about like you know did I smoke weed or you know drink nah I didn’t really start smoking cigars until
I was in my late 30s and having glass of whiskey like I’m having right now but um I was really a kid man and I think that’s because I had a a strict mother and a good childhood upbringing I think that really leveled me out right now you
Know what I’m saying so it was cool I love that I love that so obviously for you um you know it’s you know you’ve got some balance there when it went through to high school and everything um and obviously you into you were into your
Sports at the time as well too so You’ have been heavily into that as well right so you and kicking with the Sig exactly right so you had you had also got to a point where obviously as well you chosen your crew do you feel like choosing your crew
Probably I’m even jumping ahead a little bit here as well by saying this um was it a sense of comfort choosing a Brotherhood because obviously as well like you said you GRE up with a single single mother as well was was there also a bit of that that missing piece of
Brotherhood fatherhood also playing a role in in who you chose to to rep as well no reason why I say that because I didn’t need my organization to make me as a man and I was already I was already who I was U and I was already stepping out I was already
Fashionable I was already you know pulling you know I was always getting the beautiful women you know what I’m saying so they like damn D how you pull that I was the one that like hey man you gonna go talk to when we out in the B
Like damn D how many numbers you got I was that dude you know what I’m saying so being you know being in a part of the organization and needing needing uh the organization or you know a surrounding I just so happen to be I just had good
Friends and we all had the same personality that’s what made everything pop off okay I hear that I hear that okay I’m heing it um obviously then you know you you get into like I said you get to that stage in the life where you start
To date but before we get to that point I mean you said I was you a single mother mom was a preacher what was uh what was the relationship like with between you and your mom describe that for us what was that like for you growing up well Mom mother is the type
Of woman that would call me and pray for me and start speaking in tongues if I feel like I’m having a bad day and I’m like Mom this is what I got going on and before you know it she uh before I know it she she’ll start going in like Mama
Just I just tell y having a bad day she said in the name of Jesus this is God and I like Mama okay she don’t went in so but yeah man it’s it’s it’s always a good have a good support system my my aunt is a preacher as well her husband is one
So that it sounds like you next yeah nah uhuh it ain’t my call no that a my call it actually be fun to to be real man I I actually have to deal with that uh when it comes to uh Ministry my my business is my
Ministry uh come on I have to deal with a lot of personality a lot of people have you know came through probably had over a hundred models that come rock with me over the years and through that time I’ve helped people build a personality I’ve had models who dealt
With you know sickness or you know family issues and they was like D I needed this at this time I need this for right now in my season of my life thank you and so when it comes to Ministry my business is my Ministry love that so obviously you obviously had a relationship with your mother as a single mother she was also a preacher etc etc but obviously we don’t know the the the story behind obviously your father in aspect was it um you know I don’t know if you men I don’t know if
What the story is there but a little bit Yeah my father passed away when I was 26 years of age and I didn’t see him um probably I only seen my dad about 10 times growing up as a man okay and when I seen him uh in the
Casket I broke down like I seen that joker every day and it was weird because I didn’t know I had that type of connection my coaches and my uh my coaches were my my father figures and my uncles that’s who kind of kept me at Bay
With my uh with my manhood and you know they’ll cuss me out at the same time love on you at the same time but the same to they’ll keep you real you know what I’m saying so I don’t my father really wasn’t around my mom got married
And I had a great you know uh stepfather who came in plugged in it when I was in in middle school right when I needed that transition and so that’s why I enjoy teaching middle school because that transition is so vital noway so you so for you you’re kind of
Almost helping the transition along you know you want to make sure it’s smooth for yeah they do they deal with a whole bu [ __ ] that we a we a have to deal with nowadays they deal with a lot but yes I hear it I hear it so obviously you
Know like I said I love to maybe explore that little but you said obviously you know you broke down in front of the you know when you saw your dad and it’s like you didn’t know you had that kind of depth of of feeling what was that what
Was that like then for you what was that like in that time and then because obviously you know every young man fathers are important because obviously that’s what we look up to first and foremost and we model ourselves on them and stuff like that but for you
Obviously like I said you you you didn’t necessarily um had that same experience all the way through so what was it what was it like for you growing up with uh with a father that was necessary that that was I don’t to say I don’t to say
Any separate or anything that but just I was gr up with a father and he wasn’t in the home I was always connected because my grandfather was a bishop who was actually his daddy so there was always a connection and he passed away in 95 so there was always a connection so I
Although I was connected disconnected from me I was always connected with my granddad so I didn’t really feel that disconnect now my dad dealt with schizophrenia he was on drugs uh you know he dealt with a lot of stuff he passed away downtown um you know self self-inflicted however he passed so uh
He dealt with a lot you know saying a lot of demons you know I I broke that generational curse in regards to what he had going on um so that was very important and to not go down that path as far as being isolated when I do have
A bad moment or because the isolation as a man is very it’s a bad place to be in and because I knew my dad I knew I had some type of trait of that in me and I had to address that as well yeah listen you’re you’re speaking
Good man I mean I myself I feel it I have a I have that kind of avoidant trait um that you know either if you hurt me or if you’re getting too close and I’m not ready that’s when you know I start to become avoidant and pull away
Uh from the person is self become self-destructive in a relationship after a while so yeah I’m definitely definitely hearing you on that one and commending the self awareness to even see that as well um you know going forward so okay so you know coming from you know like I said coming from
College you know some people do University after that but then obviously for you um do you find love in that space at that time or is that love come a little bit later for you oh man I’ve dealt with um when it came to love I’ve dated some beautiful women dog I
Dated some beautiful women but in the same token I wasn’t all over the place but in the same token that there was a time in my life that I wasn’t ready to when you know had a chick to hit you in the face because she don’t know who your friends
Are it was just like it was once case point I had a beautiful cousin that came over my house one time and um the chick I was dating just popped up in my crib she didn’t hear the voice in the head in the back and um she just popped me in my
Lip when I came outside I was like dang so just just randomly so I’m just kind of giving you a then on top of that I call myself because I really loved the chick at the time I was 24 25 I was coming home from college she had good
Hair she about 511 bad um so I gave her a promise ring that’s the funny part I gave her a prise ring so everybody seemed me giving a promise ring they say oh my God it’s in engagement read and so I had to run with it dog it was the
Weirdest [ __ ] ever so that was just one situation but she was abusive she was really crazy then a couple years later I dealt with um thinking the child was mine did the DNA test did the whole baby shower co-workers got me stuff I was 27
After the time 28 I was very had a little old off I was making really good money this is when Aro mortgage was in it uh so I was making you know good 70 right then so um yeah was in the delivery room man that DNA test came back do
0.5% I said boy I tell you I just I came with this was in a cycle then I dealt with a I dealt with a person that was a um how can you put it I’m not trying to say she was she was a judge you know attorney whatever she
Was an attorney at the time bro I I I went to a friend’s house sing Party came home car caught on 4 5 3:00 in the morning this was this was from 24 to 32 all [ __ ] just going all back to back I said you know what maybe this dating thing ain’t for
Me right now I think I’m a chill and these are beautiful women do and I said I don’t know if it was me or what I was putting out too good I don’t know what it was but it was something so from 24
To 28 20 24 to 32 I didn’t have the best of luck when it came to dating so damn yeah so you got a cheated on story and an abusive one in a sense oh and I got M car burned up yeah sorry what in the didd yeah 3
O’clock in the morning I came home car was lit on fire well I was actually at home I had been home for about an hour and it just so happened to be in Flames when I my neighbor knocked on my door yeah now I gotta I got some stories
Man okay tell us okay so so obviously why do you why why why do you think there that you keep ending up in these kind of relationships where there is wildness going on some some craziness going on some well Behavior going on this is self- evaluation and this is
Self-reflection half of that has to be shutting down and like I said you know get too comfortable like oh let me just not call today because I’m locked in on doing what I’m doing and for whatever reason oh I see why you ain’t asking your phone
Or they you know this social media Wen really popular at that time so it it really wasn’t social media it was just me just being an introvert you know what I’m saying we are together I’m fine and I just had to get out of that stage of
Just communicating more I’m a horrible I I told myself this probably a couple years I’m a horrible Communicator uh but I’m a perfectionist at the same time so once I start addressing why these things were happening and what was the the common denominator I had to look at myself man
I ain’t going to lie to you I was I was bad you know I was you know the thing about it is it wasn’t an option it wasn’t I didn’t hard have it hard getting a woman you know I’m saying it’s just a matter of keeping the right one
But if the minute I felt like the energy was off from steady ask me hey baby can I see you today she’s like oh no today in a good day and uh my house ain’t clean or my kids here and I feel like if I’m seeing you on a consistent basis and
I’m never around to see your kids then we don’t need to talk but you want me to come around so as a man the older I start coming around and I start seeing oh you want me to come out at 10:00 when the kids are going to sleep then that
Was the denominator that was like no I think I’m good but the same told she still like me but she just want me to come around the kids now I don’t know if you was still kicking with your kids Daddy but those are the situations that
I dealt with if we out together and you know we rolling around well I need to drop the kids off cuz I have always dated older women never really dated women My AG age and so I didn’t I start dating old women because I didn’t want
To deal with the veral of H I got to you know the kids here and I just want to make sure I’m like what you want to make sure yeah we we doing I do you know what I’m saying so what’s the point so the minute I started getting that or
Rejection that’s when I shut down and and hindsight it wasn’t always a good look you know what I’m saying we got along great um but it was one of the type of things where give me the same energy if I want to come over and cook and show
The the characteristics I have I need you to see me at 7 o’clock in the afternoon and 8:00 don’t call me when I got to go to work and next morning no because now I feel like we just we just doing our thing and you don’t take me seriously so I will shut
Down wow and so then you end up with these type of women because they also are looking for a Ty energy and you tend to represent that kind of energy yeah damn so you get into obviously some relationships where one’s abusive another one is cheating as well
What does that do to your mindset then after you know you you’ve after you dated and experienced such such experiences what’s your mindset um I really need to develop a mindset I think I uh I developed a more a hardness I’m like damn I can’t trust
None of these chicks you know what I’m saying especially after uh you know thinking a child was M I think that was really devastating in a sense uh because I was you know after my family had did the um the baby shower and you know I’m
In the delivery room and you know you told my whole family you know after that par that that was the that was a cookie you know that was that was hurtful right there but in the same token I addressed it and you know she seen me probably
About 3 years after like well if you still want to come around you still no it don’t work like like that um so it was more so how can I put it it was weird man it was just I had to develop a hardness that’s was the app I said I’m
Gonna get it together I’m gonna find me wife but the minute I found one it was like I don’t know so it was like damn is she really real or does she have some other stuff going on so and so to make it you know you when you Contracting and this
Is the the job stability part when you Contracting as a man you know you trying to get it together when you feel like that you you know making good money but then again your your job isn’t stable because you making it but a lot of jobs weren hiring full times people they just
Hiring for temporary fix to get these portfolios out and so as a man psychologically I wanted to say well I want to have my stuff together you know what I’m saying but in the same token the OD I got like hey meet me where I’m
At and so I start having to address that man because you know I wanted to make sure I have my house I want to have this that and the other it didn’t always be like that it wasn’t like that all the time damn so so just take me back though this this
Thisan these two stories the cheating and abuse one how do we yeah okay so maybe that’s still the cheating one like you know for you obviously looking at a relationship looking back at it was it always something that you know now looking back and that you should have
Never entered into it when you when you look at so I’m G tell you how crazy let me tell you how crazy this is man so the last couple of chicks I’ve dated literally I’m like why can’t you get a chick that’s that’s completely divorced and got all the stuff together
Like the last bad two chicks either was getting out of divorce or had just got a divorce it was just so I came I haven’t it’s very rare that I find one that just ain’t talking to nobody i’ rather find a chick there I’m good I ain’t dating
Nobody but I know that’s the way we in no that’s not gonna happen so it’s almost like you look at yourself and you’re like damn well [ __ ] you know I know I inbox people every now and then and you kind of have to self-evaluate yourself like well you don’t never know
What’s going on so it’s kind of like a trust you really have to say you know what I’mma trust this one and I’mma move forward but to go back to abuse relationships and those type of relationships you just have to have faith that that that person is genuine
Who she say she is and the same token I have to be open and vulnerable and to make her feel comfortable to open up to me and the same token I probably not have gave that energy where she’s comfortable enough she probably could say it similar well I’m G say this just
To see if he gonna react this way and if I didn’t give her what she needed of course that’s her defense mechanism you know what I’m saying well I’mma tell him I’m talking to this dude just to see if he now that’s not the right way to do it
But it’s some people do it you know what I’m saying you ain’t the only one you know so you know how people do no I definitely hear that I definitely definitely hear that I audience are kind of asking what happened with the car getting you know
Set on fire what is up with these stories that are so wild man you know what they say my granny said what do you got in your pants is making it too good so you don’t never think it’s a sexual thing where you know if I can’t have you no I always
Told myself I never want to get loved that hard where somebody say I love you to death and it was more so a psychotic thing that um that I was dealing with and you know you pick up spirits and that was a spirit that I didn’t know I
Was dealing with to bring a head to that one you know what I’m saying so when you dealing with um those type of people in regards to you never know what what they dealing with yes do but sometime people dealing with life man they they they
Crazy and so she was a tad bit crazy man very crazy that was a whole movie I can’t hear you oh sorry about that yeah sorry saying that obviously you get to obviously you know I mean relationships are always a tricky one but that is giving you know build a
Project you like a Build A Bear boo you know like to try and win the affection of that person it’s giving a little bit of that because you end up in two s situation that quite quite heavy you know um as well so you know the fact that you said obviously that the
Cheating part the house is getting set on fire kids not mine I need to know wait the kids not mine situation what do that it was just one it was just one child it was one child so I dealt with this chick uh she was you know we we
Dating we didn’t date in high school she was a couple years older than me and um we started dating and the thing about it is I was actually protected and I know that it wasn’t mine but I she was so adamant doc that it was my child that I had been brainwashed
This is my baby but um you know I knew that was a a percentage that even though you strap up it can you know things happen you know whether it busted or or something so after you know calling me kick rocks and things in that you know
She had cut me off that’s the crazy point I didn’t get it the part she actually cut me off don’t call me don’t text me blah blah blah and then all of a sudden hey by the way I’m pregnant I’m [ __ ] you lying so it was one of the
Type of things where you know me being up with my upbringing I said let me swallow the pill and take care of my business tell my family and um my partner say they killing me in my smoke [Laughter] detector I knew that was coming if you
Want if you want to change it you can always change it or take the back it’s for free no problem to no it’s cool uh I have to get a whole ladder and everything man it’s all good yeah so it is what it is my thing
Is to project and get you know get what I need to get out of it and have some fun with it you know if they want to uh dissect that when they can so but yeah man it was life man it was it was it wasn’t a good situation with that man
So I’m still I’m still stunned we got put a car on fire cheating and then abuse yeah man and the crazy part about it is uh oh man I’ll be okay they talking about I’m losing this fight with the uh with my smoke detector I’mma
Lose it but I’mma win it at the same time but you know how how did I deal with that man I dealt with it by um just pushing through I kind of like you know I dated some women that wasn’t so attractive I said maybe that’s it maybe
I had a certain type that wasn’t um that that I needed to start looking from you know what I’m saying so once I started looking at them like hell they was just that just as insecure as well so and obviously you said obviously you dat older women as well you
Know do you know the reason why you feel like you’re more drawn to older women well for one I like older women tend to just care of themselves different you don’t have to deal with a lot of the rhetoric and you know oh my kids here and if they want if they want
You around you gonna see the kids you gonna come over you GNA cook you gonna have some fun it ain’t one of them type of things where you you know you having to to really prove a lot but you still have to prove who you are as a man but
Younger women they tend to be too wishy-washy man and I just love a woman with hips a level woman that just has that natural look and grown women they tend to have that natural look and that was just that’s kind of what that’s what I’m attracted to interesting I hear that definitely
Interesting okay so um you know what took you on to ready to love like what was the reason why you to love the reason why I went on to reddit’s love man I had been single probably about three years um I’ve dated you know here
And there and um I was like what what is there to lose you know as far as nowadays people don’t really meet people at the gas station anymore like they used to or doing the um at Walmart or down the grocery a you know it’s one of
The type of things where like dang when can I actually meet somebody that’s genuine so you know even nowadays people meet on social media they inbo people they you know they see you how you move they inbox you hey I think we should go out so you flirt a little bit so that’s
Almost become the norm so when it came to ready to love I was more so driven about that just let’s have some fun what what what more do you have to lose as far as from a socialization standpoint and how can it wasn’t even about my
Brand it wasn’t about me trying to be on as a Fashion Stylist it was just about me ready genuinely trying to find somebody I built this this this thing called Damonte I had build myself up with my confidence and then I was ready to project who I was and ready to
Showcase and just have some fun with it so when R the love presented itself I had people that was on social media they like hey I think you should be on here and I like I ain’t gonna do that man just you know it is what it is so I had
Got an inquiry not knowing that you know some of the producers had already inboxed me about being on the show and you just that just shows that it wasn’t about the projection it was just about how I was as a person so I didn’t really
Think they really knew who I was but I said what do I have to lose so I said let’s have some fun with it so like let’s go I hear that so obviously you thought that was it’s just an opportunity not necessarily you know anything crazy but
It’s opportunity at the end of the day which is fair there nothing wrong with that at all um uh you know obviously getting on to the show like I said you go for very rigorous tests and stuff like that but who was it you who was it
That you know first out the ladies caught your eye you know who was it the first person that caught your eye man because this sound crazy it was um well the first thing about it I don’t know if y’all tell you the little can I tell you
This back story real quick so when I first walked on uh on set guess who was my classmate just take just take a random guess I tell you so April was my classmate I went to high school with her oh yes he did say yeah so that that in
Itself that was the first thing that caught my attention I like damn my classmate on here I mean okay here we go so but for from the ey test I mean I just like the way Kos she looked and I like the way Lex you know look both of
Those were kind of eye-catching to me as well um and it wasn’t because of their skin complexion or their hair texture it was just they just had a certain movement about themselves you know what I’m saying so that’s who caught my attention M she was cool
Yeah she just had that grown woman body you know what I’m saying as far as the the top area the bottom had that grown um Lex was she was slim personality from what I saw you know what I’m saying so it was just the it test okay for ey test wise okay cuz
She with you m all right cool so so so so obviously you get put on the show like who who’s who did you connect with on that day CU I know you weren weren’t there for very long but who did you connect with cuz I know you guys are on
Set for like 12 12 something hours but who did you connect with who you felt like you had a conversation with like it’s worth exploring to see if we got something more man it was it was crazy it was actually it was actually those two that I really had the longest conversation
With um as you know sometime if anybody been a part of production sometimes stuff get navigated throughout the the whole day of the set and so as far what I was presented with and way was able to converse with the longest those two had a really good conversation I feel like
The Vow was cool um I don’t know if they was attract me attracted to me in that sense but as far as from my the vibe that I got I think that was a got you know I think it was a good vibe going on so now April was a whole different
Subject that was the person that I had the longest conversation with probably because we felt like they felt like we knew each other and so um you guys only saw a five minute clip versus a 45 minute conversation that made me seem like I was all over the place which was weird
So he’s back guys he’s back he’s back he’s back I thought he was changing his alarm and he was he’s excuse oh man you got jokes I thought you Wasing alarm I thought he was like it’s all good man but but okay so obviously Kia was one that you connected
With you know had a good conversation or at least good scene eyesight test Etc then obviously got a little bit deeper one or two other people as well so um okay so obviously you weren’t there for very long so out of all the ladies who was it that you know it test and
Obviously you know person who had the right kind of you know makeup in terms of individual who would you say who who’s a top of that who was a top for you that you felt like you know what this is worth exploring a bit more at least to find out
Where where this could actually go um I probably would have say Kos on the same now I got a I got a spill a sale on this one it was funny that m actually asked me like a nutcracker when she put the side by side picture on me yes yes and I
Was like what the hell you going to ask me about my fashion sense and then go but I said I get it she’s young that was the last thing she probably seen as ABC so Nutcracker I get it so it was one of the type of things where I was kind of
Caught off guard by that but I didn’t I didn’t really piggyback on that too much but she was attractive too but um that just kind of when I seen how everything was edited I was like well I be that so they kind of threw me off guard from a funny standpoint but uh
Kosi was the one I think from an arst I just like she just had a different you know sass about herself is that the kind of woman that you normally go for uh yeah uhhuh be honest with you okay okay he he so obviously uh CU
She is usually a type um but obviously as a show goes on you got to explore different connections on the first day as well now you mentioned obviously knew April as well I mean uh so you guys obviously didn’t connect in the show guessing in that way I don’t know if you
Guys did or when it came to April I think more so I think that she probably looked like damn I played she was a cheerleader I was a football player I’ve been knowing her for 28 years it was like damn that’s my homeboy I’ve been KN I ain’t really
Never seen D like that so I don’t never know I never knew if she really was attracted to me in that sense so I don’t think there was a lot more chemistry as far as eye contact as far as connections I don’t think she probably gave off to
The producers that she was really feeling me like that and so when they got into the deliberation I think it was more so like man you know I don’t really see anything higher than what he I saw him in high school and that’s kind of what she gave off you know like the
Person I used to be versus who I am now as a man if that makes any sense to you yeah yeah so how did you feel obviously about being you know picked off as number one to go like were you expecting it or was it something that was a bit of a shock
Like what was your thought process man I was I was caught completely off guard I didn’t see it coming uh I started looking at how everything was projected um as time progress as far as even with we playing the games I’m like damn I was a little bit too laidback I was too
Quiet um I was more so just like damn I’m just gonna have some fun I don’t want to come off too strong so I was really confident about who I was but I wasn’t arrogant I was more so just let me just kind of play it and I think someone made
A sense uh they made a comment I acted like a business social versus a a a mixer and I have to I have to uh rebut on that I was like more if you ask me what I do and what have I’ve been done and the only question you get is the
Back end of my response of course it’s going to seem like I’m talking about myself all the time because you don’t hear what they asked me first so I have to say that first and we regard to the people that said well he’s just talking about himself no they asked me the
Question first I answered and so they just edited the part where they was saying they could have been doing a say a favor and say we just want to highlight what he doing not versus hey this is what she asked him first I hear that I definitely get that as well
Okay I hear that 100% so obviously look you know you know obviously having to be voted out uh first on the on the show is never a nice thing we wish that you know ready to love didn’t do that because it just kind of ruins at least the
Experience a little bit as well abely obviously for you then um you know like I said you got to connect with who you need to connect with Etc and then obviously end up going home um what did you learn um I man you only have one life to
Live people going to talk about you they going to say that you this that and the other they’re going to rag on you um what I learned about myself during this time is probably I have to open up in a sense if I do come across something really allow myself to really not
Necessarily sell myself but most tell what I’m bringing to the table instead of just being too LAX with it I think I was too LAX and too uh but also very transparent as to where I wanted to be but I think for the most part when I
Came on the show I think I was just too laidback but knowing what I want and what I learned about myself is I have to really be assertive more so why why do you feel like you came into that place so so relaxed or so laidback he said like you said obviously
When you when you when you approached it you’re a bit more laidback what was going through your mind and your head as to why you approached it so laidback um if we if we go back to the story when I was talking about being molested at 5
Years old last year just started dealing with that as a man so at 43 years of age I just started dealing with life experiences life trauma so when it came to still deal making myself vulnerable and dealing with life expectations and trying to get to another Point that’s
Probably where I was I I was really at a point where I was really really starting to understand who I was as a man as far as dealing with childhood hurt so when it came to that particular thing it was more so like dang I really I’m ready to
Do it now so I came off as like baby steps you know what I’m saying I’m ready but I’m take these baby steps so here we go you know what I’m saying so it was it was more so life was lifing man life was really lifing so so obviously then you know
Having like I said you you know having those moments where you’re you came in a bit more relaxed like you said I was a bit more chilled a bit more passive in that sense and you linked it back beautifully to obviously you know childhood as well some of the trauma
That you also face as well um did did you honestly feel ready to be in a relationship you know while on the show did you feel ready that you were actually ready to be in a relationship I actually feel like that I was ready because the characteristics that I had
Dealt uh who I was as a man uh when I say as a man I mean uh self evaluation you have to evaluate yourself you have to be single for so long to understand you have to love yourself first and if you don’t love yourself and and you try
To get rid of the U the um just to watch man because a lot of times you know a lot of women some people as men we have we give off good energy but also there’s bad energy so when it comes to making yourself vulnerable whatever type of if
A woman seems like she’s she’s opening her smile within that first three minutes you can really tell where the conversation is going to go and if if if it’s off as a man you probably not going to want to open up to her and so when it came to the show I
Think I was I was ready but I didn’t know what to expect you know what I’m saying I was I didn’t I previous Seasons I understood where it can possibly go but I didn’t go into until saying I’m G find my wife the first day you know what
I’m saying I see I’m I’m a l low and we’re gonna see where it goes okay so obviously I mean what happens after the show sometimes is that people end up dating after the show right people start making movements after the show was anybody that was did you did
You try to pursue anything with anybody after the show uh so I’ve actually it’s funny story man uh one of the other castmates we actually went to college together we didn’t realize that until after the fact and I like you know we went to college together right and it
Was kind of funny about that story um but I’ve never I’ve reached out to him just to kind of check because I’m cool with everybody um I I’m kind of got out the way I was you know I don’t know who I all dated who had what type of
Relationship with who so I was kind of like a you know I’m just cool you know if I speak to you I’ll speak to you now I did some someone did reach out to me the day I got uh eliminated um the day I got eliminated um somebody
Did reach out to me and say hey I just wanted to see how you was doing and things of that sort but uh other than that man it was it was definitely a hell of a experience okay I guess I was see you know I I I
Think let’s let’s let’s take it let’s let’s Dr it back cuz listen look RTL we wenter on there for very long and it wasn’t much that happened no no was a question the ladies ask ladies were talking about your stability and your credit what is that what was the story behind
That man so the story behind that was um when you have a complished everything that you have accomplished in regards to eight sold out fashion shows published book author modeling agency things of that sort it’s like man if I want to take myself and get this big old
Building there are certain things you got to have grants together you know things of that sort so she had asked me a question and I just answered it so it wasn’t like I had just got my stuff together I got my stuff together it was just a grown person conversation that
Credit was highlighted in a sense that me being all over the place the stability part is not there because if they fact find they’ll see what I’m about so it was just kind of interesting how they got that particular conversation got highlighted at the end even when it came to the tattoo question
You know when you out there on set man it’s hot you’re hungry um you don’t never understand how things are transpiring and so sometimes you might space out for just an inkling of a second and the question was hey what’s that tattoo in your hand and I just
Didn’t hear what she had said so it may made it seem like it was just randomly asked but I told him that each one of my tattoos is a very significant part of my life as to what I’ve been through as a man it kind of tells the story so that’s
The story behind the tattoos if they didn’t hear me or they want really know understand what was going on with my tattoos I really didn’t hear a question and I had kind of spaced out because I was hungry H okay so you so you you spaced out at a
Point and then obviously when they asked about the tattoos you didn’t ask see you didn’t question yeah I didn’t really hear damn so it made it seem like I was just it made it seem like I was looking for some cuckoo birds or some [ __ ] I was
Like man this is some [ __ ] so when I saw it I was kind of pissed off I said well damn they got me so so what what does a tattoo on your arm mean then with uh you talking about I have 35 so yeah uh this one is elements
Of style it’s my acronym for elements of style my brand it’s EOS okay and and it has and it has a meaning is in the elements it represents you or something what element of style is my brand name yeah element of style is pretty much a fashion my fashion
Brand LLC Elemental style the business I started five years ago um I got a tattooed in my hand I got my grandmother tattoo to my my fraternity brand um so each one of my tattoos is a scar in my life when I had to trans through transition through pain and so I
Got tattoos to help me get through that particular story in my life so that’s why I have so many tattoos because I’ve been through a lot so every time I’ve been through a lot uh make give an example I got this tattoo on my neck uh because when my grandmother
Passed I was grieving so in order for me when I was grieving I got a tattoo because that was that’s the way I was feeling that day okay so is that is that is that a common thing to happen to you that where you get deactivated and you you zone out or you
Disconnect uh because of something because obviously this one happened because obviously you hungry um you know so so is that a regular thing in relationships that you that you can dis deactivate or zone out in those moments bro I I’ll be honest with I can
If you piss me off run I can be talking to you one day and then you say the wrong thing I just cut you off so quick it’s not a good place to it’s it’s not a good thing at all trust me it’s not and it’s something that I’m working on maybe
Just having a conversation as to why did I give out something that’s you know that made them trigger that or is there something that needs to be addressed you know we need to talk about uh as as grown people so when it came to um cutting people off it’s like when you’ve
Been hurt so much or when you have to deal with something you learn to pick up that mentality be hard and it’s it’s the um it’s the part of what what drives you you know me it drove me because if I have if I have that type of cutter
Spirit that means I’m not gonna allow certain energy to allow me to to uh be in my space and if I feel like you’re not good for my energy I’mma cut you off that’s a quite a it’s quite a a response to to to that I
Mean that that is going to be very difficult then to at a current at a current state to make it a long-term relationship work because obviously if you um you know if your person that gets into a space where you can be so dismissive should say or disassociate that can make you miss
Important aspects of the relationship you know as you as you disassociate so let’s go back just before ready to love when you kind of found you know found found out that information obviously about what you had experienced do you feel like you were ready to love at that point in time
Before do you feel like you’re ready Looking Back Now that you feel like you’re ready that’s a good question bro I ain’t gonna lie to you that that is a damn good question um I would say yes and no um the yes part of be saying when you tired of
Being single you want companionship you want to be loved you want to love someone the no part about that is have I addressed everything that I need to address as a man and the question at that particular time no I didn’t but I knew I want it it was I was feeling
Voids you know what I’m saying just to kind of push through and um and that’s where you just need to have the right person to have that type of conversation because it wasn’t G to happen overnight but just needing someone just to balance you out you know what I’m saying so
That’s what I was needing even if it just being that companionship that of a woman that I was needing or lack um doing that particular part had say for instance I had V with somebody we exchange numbers we start building chemistry I just needed someone just to
Say hey let’s take make it slow but not to the point where we going too slow but let’s let’s help build each other up CU this is what I’m dealing with as a man this is what I need to deal with this is what I have never dealt with and this is
Right now this is where I need you to be just a friend and the rest will take care of itself and so last year I don’t think I was really mentally ready to really go head over heels but I was definitely ready to love so you weren’t ready to go head of
Heels but you’re ready to love so your love would have been taking a bit slow just trying to explore things um in that in that area Okay um I mean so not trying to be overhead the heels but be F but ready ready to love wouldn’t that still mean that you
W’t ready to love because if you’re not if you’re not ready if you’re not ready if you’re not ready to to to be Head Over Heels or you’re not ready to give all then would that really mean that you’re ready to love at that point in
Time and by the way this not an indictment because you found out some information that has obviously changed your life so I’m just wondering I don’t so the the trans being transparent is being honest with yourself and so when you’re not honest with yourself as a as
A as an individual those type of things will get tainted because you you a woman can see that blockage or was you know what holding you back and you know sometimes if you have a good the right woman can see through it and help you push through it so so um with that
Particular show I think it was more so it was what I needed you know it was like now did I say that it mess with myself or seem a little bit it didn’t mess with me but it did kind of [ __ ] with me I’m like damn I got kicked me
You know what I’m saying so it did kind of mess with you because now I’m trying to make myself vulnerable but you know from whatever reason I was like ah you know ain’t good enough right now you know what I’m saying now the crazy part about that whole deliberation my name was never
Mentioned to go home you know what I’m saying that was the most intriging part about that oh you wasn’t supposed to go home someone to go home I don’t think so my name was never my name was brought up but never mening to go home so William name was to go home or
He they brought his name up but my name was never now it could have been somehow they edit on the back end but for TV purposes my name was never mentioned until it was actually time for me to actually go that was the first time it was actually saying hey you go
Home why do you think they sent you home in the end um man it’s not even meant for me to figure that figure that out doc I just hey at the same time you never understand why things might happen it could have been doing me a favor because they
Knew uh I probably they probably saw something they like man his energy just off it could have been just hey let’s let’s give him a chance you know can’t put everybody on the show so I understand how production works but in the same token I’m not one of those
People that will put myself in a position where I want a to be a part again you know what I’m saying by giving too much information so I would say this it was a hell of a experience I had a tremendous time but I still I still
Can’t fathom why they kick me off I just that’s not meant for me to understand so I mean how did you find out this information because clearly someone’s obviously telling you that your name wasn’t mentioned cuz he wasn’t in the deliberation with the ladies unless you were and you didn’t tell us
Um I spoke with some people you know like I said um some people did check on me after the show and they just say hey oh sorry oh you’re back oh no I did have some people you know that was really genuine I feel like I met met
Some really good people that was genuine and uh for the most most part they was like we wern’t expecting you to go home they thought just like with any show they expect certain people to go home based on their energy or what their perception is and I wouldn’t even say
For the I TST it wasn’t because I felt like I was the most um my personality was the bigness I was probably too laidback n that probably was a hindrance in a sense of what they was wanting me to give on the show so I couldn’t figure
That out man and I’m just you know it is what it is but I knew had I had another opportunity I would I was gonna bring to the table because you probably saying to yourself like damn they ain’t the same dude we seen on TV I he that okay so it’s all good
Man no it’s interesting so I mean obviously looking back at the show yourself obviously have you watched you’ve watched it you know why didn’t you why do you think like you have to go though like if you really look back at it just look back on it from the show
Why did you have to go because obviously of course they were talking about you know uh you know they’re talking about um you know they talking about obviously you know credit and stability and this and that but why is it that you feel like you had to go why do do you know
Why you have to go I don’t feel like I had to go I think I was chosen to go so um I knew what I was bringing to the table as far as my mentality as far as my drive as far as what I wanted to
Present with the latest as far as the dating aspect as far as where I wanted to go what I wanted to do what I wanted to experience who I wanted to experience it with um those things were already in my head once I kind of assessed the
Whole situation kind of was kind of uh getting a synopsis of which individual I feel like who I can Vibe with first what lady I think I liked her smile I like the way she moved her dress her smell her perfume you know who I feel like
That was genuine that we can build up to that point so I had already assessed that uh by the end of the night um so by the time I was caught off uh caught up as the last two I was completely caught up going so you know like I said I’m not
Perfect by any means you know far as that credit statement I don’t I’ve heard far worse on those type of show I mean on ready for love than just a credit so I don’t think that was just a a significant part as to why I was sent
Home I mean hell if you seen if you seen the the last two episodes you understand so I don’t know Man could it be that the ladies just didn’t see it in you I mean could it be that you know listen I get the fact that you want me to go home but I’m saying could it be that obviously that the ladies s sight in you that’s why you at
The bottom at least it could have been I could have been not their type you know I’m actually okay with that you know if I wasn’t their type and they probably could have said man I don’t like the way he wore his beard I don’t like the way
His skin looked or what he had on his fashion sense just with my type of vibe he’s doing too much it could have been any of those things and I would have been perfectly cool with that but it’s somebody out there for somebody you know
As far as maybe I had a you know it could have been the way I looked at my smile when I turned a certain way and they seen something that they didn’t like like ah I’m good on that one could have been anything but I do know
Nobody’s perfect you know I could have seen their imperfections as well you know so it is what it is I could have dissected each person and said like this is what I don’t like this is what I don’t like as matter of fact I don’t like that right there so it could have
Been any one of those things they could have said the same thing about me you li um was there anything else on the show that you anything else up on the show that we didn’t get to see or we did get to see that you wanted to
Address uh you said ran B me one time brother oh sorry I said was there anything on the was anything on the show that we you didn’t get to address already that you like to address dress or you like to speak to man I’m just for
One I just want to say thank you for allowing me to you know this platform to be on your show and to kind of just you know say who I was and where the people can kind of get a feel for my personality other than for my smoke
Detector going off that it just went off I think I’m actually good because I know I’m getting my ass roasted right now which is cool you know I could take a joke just like they raged over talking about my suit like a whole Pepsi hey man
As a Fashion Stylist man you got to take the wins with the losses so I mean I I didn’t feel like it was a loss I wore what I wanted to wear um if you seen you know if you know anything about my clothing I wear anything I I’m not
Afraid to rock whatever I want to rock and um it is what it is but on a from a uh just from a opportunity standpoint man I I had a blast with the show I don’t have any I didn’t look at any women on there that was just like damn I
Can’t stand her cuz she she got me kicked off it was more so it was just I had a fun I had a really I had a really a good time man and uh like I said one thing I did observe and you know as it’s talking to a brother is self evaluation
And learning to address and being vulnerable for one thing I did look at some of your shows and your content is you have to address you first before you can make uh before you can open yourself up and if you never address you individual whoever you going to come
Across is going to be hurt you know what I’m saying so a lot of times people don’t never address who they are or their imperfections or why they do the things they do or why they shut down and just by a small conversation like damn I need probably to understand where if I
Was on a show and I shut down is that is that an excuse with the woman I’m with no it’s not an excuse but I have to learn how to deal with it and that’s one of the things how I’m um deal with a woman that’s ready
And if I’m in the shutdown mode that’s not going to work and so I just you know it’s a process but it’s a healing process as well and a lot of times people don’t understand you got to have patience when it’s dating thing how you can that love I love that
You can see that way you know and list you know shutting down is you’re not the only one I shut down too so um you know I know that for me personally when I’m shutting down or we call it deactivation where you’re trying to separate from the scenario it’s because things have become
Overwhelming you know in that moment of time right um and so you kind of want to deactivate and get back to your place of safety um often times often times it’s isolation being able to be isolated and just kind of be by yourself of for some people some people’s different some
People like to binge watch TV something like to you know go and do something else whatever whatever your way of kind of reentering yourself that’s a part of that but the shut down is a real thing yeah if if you shut down in a relationship you kind of leave that
Person isolated alone so yeah it might not have been the best best option to be to be on the date and show but it’s also a learning curb too right you now know um and uh you know I think your your perspective on this um you you I think
Obviously like you Shar earone and I appreciate you sharing that with that with that kind of um we appreciate the fact that you were so kind of like open about what you had been through an experience as well um now obviously that’s been a few months away the show and obviously
You’re kind of in your own zone now as well um some of Might asks are you are you in therapy at the moment are you are you in some counseling just kind of help you know you grow and just develop from the space MH that is I have actually one
Of my sororities she’s actually a counselor she actually offered um she actually offered for me to come to her practice um you know to come and get th even though as a as a man you have to learn how to swallow your pride and one
Thing we don’t do um we never we never um really want to roll with our pride and that that’s one of I thought I probably would think I need a session or two um just to really kind of get me over that hump that I’m dealing with um as far as
Especially um the public eye you know me getting ready for New York Fashion Week leaving Sunday you know there’s a lot more eyes on you you know I’m saying a lot of stuff comes with a lot of times they want to be in your position but
It’s a lot that comes with it so learning to learn how to navigate and not shut down because one thing you notice I had a good friend of mine uh that just passed away uh brother Daniel Jones he was MD for Janet Jackson and he
Was an MD for J Justin Timberlake and he was an MD for Erica Badu and that was one of my good Brothers man one thing about creative people we go to a different place that make us creative but a lot of times people don’t understand what it takes to get to
That point you know what I’m saying and so one thing that I’m learning about myself is I can’t shut down down even when I’m getting ready to reject something so dope I can’t shut down because that’s a scary place to be in because just like I told myself if I get
To the point where like Michael Jackson Prince James Brown all these great artists you ever know they have these big ass Homes but they always by the S I never want to get to that point I never want to get to that point God so I
Have to do things that’s going to put me in a position to make myself vulnerable and make sure that my circle of people allow me to be open up and be the person I need to be to find my wife I’m hearing that so um for you right now are you dating at
Moment I’m single bro I’m single um just chilling right now I’ll be 44 in July so my mother like you got to have me some grand kids one day I said Mom I got a niece that’s 5 years old and a nephew that’s 15 hey man I’mma it it’ll happen
When it needs to happen so I’m with you or not to this listen there’s no push it’s no rush it’s just like I said it’s just a a thought process but I I respect the fact I see your single oh I got now funny part
About that bro I have had a lot of women just Inc you got sent home to early and my inbox been pretty full I say that on IG Facebook and interesting so it’s it’s been interesting okay I mean is it anything else that you would want to address from
The show and if not is there anything you’re doing at the moment as a project I know you’re doing you doing nework fashion week and that you want us get behind yeah man at the at the end of the day man I’ll just say this watch out for
The um from future e episodes that I might appear on um and it’s going to be pretty fun man just to see how things shake out I’m just going to sit back and just relax and enjoy the show just like you guys and and uh you know be me you know have
Fun with it and change my damn smoke detector while they ragging on [Laughter] me my question is would you would you would you would you would you do another reality TV show though like I know absolutely I would I would I would have I learned a lot about doing reality
TV man so I know I know how to move now so trust me I do there’s a switch that we all flip and when we flip it we know what time it is I’m hearing you okay um if are you doing anything at a moment that we can get behind any
Particular kind of uh projects anything that you that we can get behind I know you’re newor Fashion Week but what can we get behind to support you on so uh my my Instagram is of course Damonte Anderson d m o n t last name Anderson
Does have the the blue check mark on it I am verified on on my Facebook um Damonte Anderson as well I’m verified as well uh you can actually go get my book it’s on Amazon don’t be afraid to show the world your signature look um you can
Type my name in my book come up um I got another fashion show coming up probably later on this year and I’m probably going to do in Texas um I have been asked to come back in for New York Fashion Week in September as well and I
Have been presented to come to La so uh being a designer man I actually love doing what I do um come on you know as far as my photography I love doing photography work I love doing videography I love making movies uh I did my first movie trailer as well so
I’m pretty creative and crafty at the same time man so I just you know if they can find me Reach Out they’ll fact find and I’mma change this smoke detector because I’mma keep on reating because my brother saying that CH in say man they lighting your ass
Up so obviously before we go I mean listen look you you in my you in my comment section when Patricia was on you felt like her narrative wasn’t necessarily correct tell me what was what was your thought process to Patricia’s narrative did you did you did you
Disree I she came off as my ex the one that burned my car up oh what you mean by that she just came off as like a you remember uh strj from Boomerang you gonna get some of this she came off just like this like what can you do for
Me mentality versus what can we do for each other like how we build each other up it was never about allowing it wasn’t even her tone I think more so it was her her um her projection and as a singer you know how how to project your voice
And if you projecting your voice at a certain time as a guy you’re not going to be receptive to how her tone is and so she never had any modulations that made it seem like she can be sensitive or there was nothing sexy about that conversation so I was just like this
[ __ ] ain’t gonna go well so in the same time I’m looking back and I’m looking at I’m listening I’m like and I’m looking at Jonathan face Express he like man I’m good on this one all you gonna finish your s or what and so there was there
Was no chemistry but she didn’t allow the man um she wasn’t going to allow the man to be to make her feminize herself she she never made herself feminine for him to be make her feel uh as a woman to feel sexy in that sense if that makes any sense
No just not not make sense just just explain that for me go a little bit deeper for me break you say now what’s what that that part that feminine part you wanted to explain she made like her movement it was just so she was just steady hand movement it was steady there
Was nothing feminine about her gestures that she was giving off you know sometimes when you talking to a woman you want to see a little moving of the hips or a little wink of the smile or something yeah something that get like hey you know I’m feeling you too it
Wasn’t it was like an interview process that she was giving off it wasn’t more so like dang and now maybe she wasn’t attracted to the brother or you know vice versa he wasn’t attracted to her but there was no chemistry that led off with either one of her conversations
That allow the man to be make her the woman that she felt like she was being they just my observation no that’s okay so I mean so you’re saying in the sense of you didn’t really get that feminine energy from her really and you know a lot of the mannerisms weren’t
Necessarily given that kind of energy okay I mean okay I mean do you did you guys get to have a conversation on the show did you get to have a conversation no we didn’t no I didn’t get a chance to M that was my first time actually seeing her
Personality um so I didn’t get a chance to really that was just the eye test from what I that what I was able to convey from what she had stated on TV and from what I had saw she was just more so just hard and nothing wrong with
You know they could have said the same thing about I didn’t give any personality I didn’t smile other than I maybe joke one or two time they could have said the same thing about me but uh she didn’t give off a lot of uh her isms wasn’t feminine you know what I’m saying
You know maybe I would had I saw her walk walk up to him or or something I could have seen the way she move oh damn she sexy but it wasn’t she didn’t give that type of energy you know what I’m saying I hear you’re saying okay I do
Get you’re saying okay um did you did do you feel like when she over see was talking about the men that you felt like she was uh dogging the men out at that point cuz I know she was talking about the men is that what you thought man it’s funny about that whole
Set man a lot of some of the women even said we wasn’t attracted I’m like now y’all could have just went on if we was ugly you know what I’m saying so if they wasn’t feeling us in a sense I think they could have they had the option to
Just roll out if we wasn’t they type more so so um that was said on the radio station you know like hey they wasn’t the most attractive women I like y’all have the the two feet to keep walking if we would if y’all wouldn’t feeling us
Like that you know but hey it is what it is you know if we wasn’t their tyght we W they type did you try to date Patricia after the show nah ah nah no because she remind you acces too much man say she I mean she’s not a badl looking woman I
Mean she’s she’s an attractive woman she just seemed like she just hard yeah she she was hard you didn’t want to break down those Wes which which walls you talking about doc I’m talking about the emotional walls but you know anything anything is possible you know everyone needs someone
Everyone just needs that person to make them open up in a sense to um allowing them just to smile a little bit because a smile can go a long way if you can crack a smile it’s not that you have them but it’s a way to make them feel
It’s okay for right now now the way you continue that afterwards that’s solely on how the communication Stacks up Afterwards okay so okay so so do you think she was the right person to go that first time WR uh like you stated man I don’t think not neither one of us was really um given a fair chance to really be who who I was it could have been for her and
I speak V it could have been her nerves so it could have been her defense mechanism not taking up for how she was stating it could have been this this is my defense I’mma come off as hard because I’m really ready but I don’t know how you know what I’m saying so it
Could have been maybe she needed to loosen up or have a lot more conversations um with other people that probably would allow her to uh just have fun but U other than that I think had she had we been presented or just allowed to have another uh chance to
Open up I think we all would have probably have done well had we been a part of the the other mixer whatever so I think it was just one of the type of things where we wasn’t getting a fair chance you know what I’m saying so that
Decision that was made it was made by that so but as you as you can see obviously she wasn’t very feminized as you said yourself so that’s probably why she got sent home right obviously amongst why you think I was in home I mean they said you have to buy credit and you
Unstable yeah that’s what they that’s what their assumption was is that not so that’s what so that’s why I asked you so what did they what did the ladies see in you that they wanted to put you they put you in the bottom two so they didn’t producers
Didn’t let you go but I’m saying they the ladies got to choose who they’re going to put in the bottom why were you at the bottom why would was the lady seeing I should have never brought for one I should have never said nothing about my credit and I should have never
Said nothing about my stabilization and that that conversation with a with a I did that to myself you know what I’m saying so um that that was one of them type of things where it was self it was self it was self wounded I did that to myself
Had I not say it even though I know who I am and what I’m about I should have never said nothing about my Credit you home yeah that credit man they just like the keyw it’s like ask word ah you said it go home bye now you said obviously other one as well that you had experienced oh at least you know you were saying that ladies don’t necessarily hold good space for vulnerability as
Well right so did you feel like is that how it felt like on the show did you feel like the ladies weren’t necess holding space for vulnerability on the show do you have many of those conversations did you have many of those conversations with people I think the
Conversations were my some my just to be transparent some of my trans conversation were cut short because some people were directed hey you go move over here you go talk to this person so um from given the time that I was given to converse with certain people I
Think it was vibing very well uh but in the same time we was on time um like I said it could have been something that was just a trigger word for them that they was hearing that maybe that conversation needed to move a different direction and so they they sought forth
To do that so uh I wasn’t intimidated by that I just you know I was only work with the hands that I was dealt With I guess obviously sign’s not clicking I don’t know what it is maybe it’s just me maybe it’s just me maybe it’s just because I’ve come back from a long flight I don’t know s is not clicking Deonte right um because obviously like I said the ladies must have seen something
Right because you’re in the bottom two right yeah um and obviously you know we know that you want to be vulnerable we know that you you want to share yourself as well um and open yourself up you spoke a little bit about Patricia being feminized as well wanted her to be more
Feminized etc etc as well um I want to ask maybe a menacing question here you know do do you feel like you carry a masculine frame yourself and absolutely absolutely absolutely I do I feel like um I’m very masculine in in regards to who I am very secure who I
Am first of all um as far as me being you got to be secure what you are and who you are and know what you bring to the table uh know how you can treat a woman and knowing what you can have you can be compassionate with a woman so uh
As far as being masculine knowing how to be that shoulder that she needs to cry on how to you know make her laugh when she need to cry on pray for her make sure when she’s having a bad day can you check there’s a lot of different
Variables that comes with with um just being masculine it ain’t just the physical aspect it’s a plethora of things of as you who you are as a man yeah okay I mean I I I I can I can get that part um I can I can I
Understand that part like I’m having a bit of Dayja okay so I guess I see okay so which which okay so I know you were there for not very long time you there for very long time I don’t know if I asked this question I don’t
Think I’ve asked a question yet who did you feel like would be able to have a conversation about vulnerability that would that you’d feel safe to have a conversation with the ladies wise who who do you feel like would be comfortable having a safe conversation about vulnerability with where you could
Share some things with I know early days it wasn’t much time that is a good question I don’t know I I can be honest with I really don’t know just from the first conversation and the the uh the time that was given I don’t know now I
Feel like it was something was there but I just don’t know because I didn’t get a chance to feel their personality long enough for me to actually converse with them to see if I if they was even comfortable enough to allow me uh what we can be comfortable with each other because I’m
Sure they have some stuff as well so that’s a two-way street it’s not so much on um a one-sided thing it’s it’s how can we build each other up because we both are dealing with different things and we both are having issues and the reason why we on this show and have we
Addressed those long before then then we won’t be on it you know obviously like you know um you were saying about the I talk about the masculine and The Feminine frame as well I think obviously I remember one part of the scene I thought was quite interesting actually because um I was
Like it’s but maybe it’s because you do fashion but it was a part where you and Alexis exchange communication and you tell her about her fashion sense right there and then and I’m like bro what are you doing why are you telling her about fashion sense in front of people about
What had asked me a question see that yeah that’s the point I’m telling you guys you guys only hear the back the end of the conversation you don’t hear the build of it build up if you ask me a question and you hear the response of mine you didn’t you didn’t hear the
Laughter between that you just saw me answering this stating my answer so just like even with the other conversation you know it was a it was a question asked and I answered it now that would it be rude of me not to answer the question no but I think obviously you
Know maybe there’s a tactile T tactful way of getting around that particular question you or answering that question you know I just want I just want I’m not saying necessar it’s a truth I’m just saying that that’s what I saw from the situation I was like what did I say just
What did I say to about something about chain that she were around to something like that or whatever whatever oh no she asked me so I think that was M probably as well so what would you do with this chain I probably would have made it a little bit something because he had
Asked me for my opinion on it and I gave my analysis and my point now mind you I put together over 700 different combinations in regard as to Fashion so it’s not too many different things I tweak I’m just like from dating a woman women that have got intimidated because
Like I can’t go out with you because you dressed too well but not knowing 90% of the time I’m in a cut off shirt and some basketball shorts because I don’t like attention I don’t like dressing up so when you ask me my opinion about my
Fashion s so how should you look I’m going to give you hey this is what I think I would have did with this and when we step out we gonna kill it because it wasn’t because of not the confidence behind It that’s I drink my whiskey but okay okay yeah them edit I said them edits they they a mofo man I just I I kind of look at it and like you said some of that stuff is self uh inflicted by me talking about my credit or that’s something I could have
I could have talked about a different aspect of what I wanted to build versus using that particular terminology so that Pro you know like you said that was my that was my go home phrase in the sense you know I ain’t tripping out it mean you know [ __ ]
Happens and you know the only thing you do is you know live from it if I’m giv an opportunity to be on another show I just know not to use that word I hear that definitely definitely definitely hear that so I I don’t know why all my questions
Are coming towards the end now but um I want to ask a question obviously like I said the previous relations that you had right you said know one was a cheater one’s a one’s this and that right um and obviously you you you were the common denominator but so what role
Do you feel like you played in these relationships like breakdowns you know what role do you feel like you played in relationship breakdowns what role I think I right probably in a sense of not really uh opening up when I needed to a lot of
Times as a man you know like I said dealing with you know your dad passing away you trying to figure it out um shutting down because you’re creative in a sense because I was all over the place meaning I was singing with different groups when I was when I a singing I was
Singing with different artists and so sometimes I’m gone on the weekends a lot um working with the band working with bands because I do photography video work with the bands and not really being there when they did need that time for me to be there and it made it seem like
I was selfish and as self evaluation is I needed to slow down and be there for him when they needed the attention not when I just wanted to see them oh so it sounds like you uh with the shutdown dismissiveness he was more in contr you felt like he was more in
Control of relationship yeah yeah I was yeah I was just you know if I it was only seeing the person when it was convenient for me not when that wanted to see when they needed to see me as well so self evaluation yeah uhhuh so it
Can go I say maybe two weeks or so when they wanted to see me like that we girl hey let’s go out and I’m like I’m just tired from working my ass out and knowing that they really needed me there you know just for that emotional support
Not necessarily when we just timate all you know so they needed more from me and I wasn’t able to give that to them and so that’s where the frustration came from it because now it feel like I just wanted about sex and that’s what the
Common Den it was good but I only seen it when I wanted to be there for them not when they needed me to uh be there for you know late at night because I’m tired and you know I didn’t have a chance to go see you on Saturdays because I was
Busy doing my thing when I can see your Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday but the weekend I’m busy and so when I started understanding like damn I need to change this whole thing of so you know just self evaluation bro trust me I hit that 100% i h that um well
Listen I I listen I want just I think I got a better perspective and understanding um as well from yourself um going forward as well um again last thoughts give us your last thoughts any last thoughts out on your mind um my last thoughts man it just man like I
Said I’m thankful for the opportunity man thank you for allowing me this platform on your platform and blessings to you so I don’t take it for granted um I’m glad that I was a some people was able to uh hear my side of the story as
Far as me being sit home it wasn’t that I didn’t have my credit together it was just a credit conversation came up and it was a voluntarily uh done information with a classmate I’m not mind that I’ve known for 28 years and I was just talking about wanting to build an Empire
Versus um and certain things needed to be aligned because I know did all this now what if I want to go get a building to have an event center or some things of that sort just certain things that needed to um be addressed so credit wasn’t never a issue because I have my
Credit together it was just more so that particular they caught the end of that particular conversation and ran with it and it made it seem like I was just all over the place and it wasn’t stable and uh that wasn’t the case at all it was
Just a ending of a conversation of a 45 minute conversation and you guys caught two minutes of it on TV and um as far as yeah as far as the tattoos and things of that sort I just pretty didn’t I didn’t hear the conversation um as far as the the dress
Situation the question was asked I gave my opinion on that was my assessment based on her uh analysis of my fashion sense if it was that bad she never would have asked for my opinion and my regards so um it was just that type of thing as far as me
Being you know loud and vibrant hey I got over 40 suits you know I could have picked out either any one of them and wor that day it was just the one I chose to wear that day and you know have some fun with it and you know was hot you
Know I just thought i’ be you know cool and the shoes I had on and chrisy was times you know it is what it is so I’m a sneaker head like myself too I can’t even lie you so I’m definitely witch you on that um but listen listen Damonte thank you
Man I appreciate you coming up on here definitely will definitely have you back as well because I think I didn’t want to go too deep into your story I you know like I said but I think it’ be great to for you know to to tap tap in a little
Bit more into your story and you know be able to have a bit more deeper conversation of that as well um going forward but look you know we wish you the best you know going forward in terms of dating and and you know uh choosing the right kind of person hopefully there
Would not be a mad one again um you know so you know on that particular aspect so uh yeah we we we look forward to having you hosting you again once more oh yeah absolutely man so this is my verifying this is me without the Hat you a like I’m cish
So yeah so uh but yeah man appreciate you brother uh thank you so much man I look forward to you know coming networking with you and and um see where this thing goes man so appreciate you brother appreciate brother thank you War members thank you so much for joining us
Um on this conversation it’s been interesting and uh I know you guys want a debrief after I might be doing a debrief tomorrow night for you guys um but uh listen we’re going to see you soon all right I appreciate you guys for keeping it cute classy and uh uh cult in the
Chat as well and uh we will see you the very next time as well much love much appreciation stay locked Stay Loaded don’t anything thing I wouldn’t do peace out
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