Rav the Avatar – The Movie

Attention Gamers the other day I logged on to League of Legends for a typical day of work on the Rift defeat but instead of following my usual pattern of asking for more pain today was different why stay in this 15-year abusive relationship when there are other attractive candidates on the market I needed a break and just had to decide on which game to play a game that was made in 2008 before

The era of chat GPT tricking me into thinking I’ve been talking to real women was the game I needed and just to double down on the amount of time I would be wasting by doing this I would also be playing the hardcore version of the game

Which outside of a word I type into many search bars is also a mode of this MMO where if your character dies you are done and all the time you’ve spent on it goes to [ __ ] what could go wrong I knew that a no name who goes by soda Papa or

Something would be creating a streamer Guild with Mr K which was clearly going well he’s not dead he’s not dead I know three does he understand does heing understand you’re both at fault you are both at fault I do not give a he a coward pu oh God okay I’m going

To go and I figured I’m a regular to the big stream world so I’d shoot my shot who is this RAV guy is the league RAV guy I don’t who the [ __ ] RAV I told him I was kind of a big deal in the most toxic Community online to which he

Said bad player if all right I’ve seen enough this is good enough all right RAV you’re in the guild welcome so it was set don’t worry during the days I will still be clocking my hours making League of Legends videos after all I need that raid Shadow Legends bag but at night I

Will be going by a different identity a dwarf Hunter aka the class most associated with people who have room temperature IQs but they get to tame a pet and according to data only 1% of them actually survive and till max level so there was only one thing left to Do I spawn into what I can only imagine the inside of Charlie Sheen’s nostril looks like but I’m freezing my wet dick off so I talk to my homeboy Sten who is all like prove you’re not a [ __ ] by killing a few wolves in the area and

I’ll give you a pair of mittens which seems like a task and reward combo on par with my pledging a fraternity days back in college so it should be a Cakewalk I popped my level up Cherry in the process to which it’s customary to say ding in Guild chat and if you don’t you are doing it wrong everyone congratulates me then homie Sten gives me my reward for euthanizing the Ragged [ __ ] I picked up a cute dress in the

Process so I was practically ready to start competing in women’s sports then we got down to business some of the local lazy as [ __ ] towns folk were like we’ve got one hell of a frog problem rumor is Donna one of the old dwarfs had an ugly ass baby decades ago and they

Just left it out in the cold but its ugly Jee mutated the thing replicated and now there’s these little short AP looking [ __ ] faces that the dudes back at the Village don’t want anywhere near their wives and it was now my problem to deal with these ugly [ __ ] swinging

Femur bones at me I run into a few dudes who set up camp out in the woods I’m thinking to get a little nuts to butt snuggling by the campfire Brokeback Mountain style but he who’s last name describes his facial hair tells me he Triple Dog dares me to genocide the

Village of trolls over there he says if I get close enough I will see that they are taller than us fitter than us and they sound Jamaican so they are probably good in bed and he can’t have them near his wife but despite me being concerned

Over why all these dudes are so insecure about their sex lives I oblige nabbing me a bit of a Slaughter sesh he’s like dope fist bump here’s an axe which would be cool if I wasn’t a hunter where 90% of my attacks come from my gun which

Coincidentally is named the same thing I call my side chick’s ass think that’s funny do you anyways I meet my first Sensei he teaches me how to poison [ __ ] among other things I’m all like wax on wax the [ __ ] off homie before I have my first interaction with a

Female she wasn’t the one then after eliminating the population of nearly every race that could have sex with the native dwarf’s wives I just have to kill one last troll now as a league player I’m not accustomed to the idea of other players wanting to help each other

Accomplish a goal but I give it a go and invite them to my party the assassination of grick near the cold goes smooth as [ __ ] into that I want to thank these homeboy Sauer and penis veins for their assistance but at this point I’m feeling like I’m growing out

Of my small town Roots I’m able to pull so many trogs at once I’m more outnumbered than a young Riley Reed on a casting couch and after being able to finish each one of them off with these I figure it’s time to visit Sensei one more time tell him I’m out this [ __ ]

And take my talents to the South Beach or anywhere away from this come dumpster Wasteland of a starting zone turns out the only way out of my incest ridden Hometown is through some supposedly deadly tunnel as every Tom Dick and Harry is warning me against walking through I can’t get through the pass

Myself the trugs in the tunnel are extremely hostile so needless to say my ass cheeks were clenched going in turns out some bald Chad paved the way and outside of running away from one ugly wife [ __ ] and I don’t see why that [ __ ] was so scared anyways a

Streamer named after Deli meets taught me that I can tag mobs and then have this 9 to5 pencil Pusher do all the work to kill them while I get all the credit which is # capitalism as you can see I exploited this dumb [ __ ] face for a

While until he eventually caught on and stopped Helping the gamer and me flamed the NPC and then Instant Karma head as my first real fight on this side of the tunnel was looking like my Last not even close baby then I hit the town gave all the cousins their love letters from the [ __ ] on the other side and I was ready to continue my quest in the new land now small travel tip if you’ve never been to cranos don’t these were some of

The most lazy drunken [ __ ] I’ve ever met they had me running around doing dog [ __ ] errands for them like picking up the box of condoms that in keeper Bim left at the campsite real boring stuff and I was planning to leave and hit up that forest with the tall chicks when I

Saw the most beautiful piece of ass in a Yeti Cave it was instant chemistry That is until she got some of Daddy’s bag and then I was practically invisible to her so I knew just the way to get her attention put myself in danger in a one lifee version of the game so she has to save me it didn’t work and I’ve deemed

Tall Queen Sarah a gold digging [ __ ] because of it anyways I met a dude named Tundra who had a tall ask he left a box of nudes in a cave and now some perverted Elite gy was puppy guarding them as a level eight if something like

This even touched me I would be days dead and [ __ ] over with a pissed off Papa soda to report to so I really only had one option but I had a Plan That’s right even a random Normie whispered me in amazement of my raw masculinity and let’s just say the box of Tundras nudes was secured now to all the women in my life who said I was awful at finding that right spot I’ll have you know that when

It comes to getting beasts to the literal perfect pixel where an NPC will do my work for me I was a pro I had my first run in with a Chinese bot who stole a chest from me and then after more Mindless questing I hit Level 10

Which to those of you who didn’t waste half your childhood playing this game is a big deal for hunters because it means you can learn how to domesticate a beast to be your pet first you have to prove yourself fit to be a father to Sensei by adopting a few temporary bastards which

Is kind of like in Middle School where they give you that crying doll as a lesson to teach you to use condoms and in some cases here I even had to deal with the jealous best friend once I proved myself a responsible parent it was time to find my soulmate and I

Already knew what I Wanted a [ __ ] pig I named my big black pig Howie and with that a new lifelong Adventure was about to Blossom a short King Ginger and the thing that would ultimately be responsible for wiping the guil in a raid how we were now ready to tear this narn at Wasteland

A new [ __ ] when I realized I was missing something wait a minute turns out these entitled swine can actually run away this just pissed me off and I knew things would have to change no more cute nicknames for my kids no more soft parenting as someone who grew up in the

’90s and is now playing an oldd version of World of Warcraft in his 30s I’d say I turned out fine so nothing but tough love for my pigs son moving forward I made him kill his family as punishment for my first son leaving me but I soon

Found out I have to keep these stupid animals Happy by feeding them and apparently the only way to do that is to go into this Lord of the Rings looking man-made Mountain [ __ ] to visit Bella a California 2 out of 10 at best to teach you how to put food in your little

[ __ ] mouth you will now be able to feed your pet she also taught him how to growl which meant that no Beast would ever attack me again turns out similar to me having abilities these swine flu spreaders can learn some too except the process to get them is the most convoluted [ __ ]

Ever you have to pay to put your own child in daycare then you have to do research on what wild animals can teach you skills as if this is some religious avatar the Last air bender [ __ ] lore so I finally find a bear and start to tame him so that I can

Learn hey you get back here you make love to my wife then I have to find a whole different species to tame so that I can teach my own remedial child how to bite and apparently the only only type of wolves that know this are the starving kind who have watched way too

Much Mean Girls movies growing up that they only Patrol in groups I had to execute 200 IQ strategies to divide and conquer the group straight Napoleon style kill off Regina George and then ultimately tame the orphan basic [ __ ] all so that it could teach me bite and I

Could train Howard except for the fact that he didn’t want to learn bite and he was too stupid to learn claw I had to build something called loyalty level before he would use his [ __ ] mouth so I made him genocide his entire family every time he would be hungry I would

Feed him the meat of his dead relatives until finally the walking piece of bacon learned how to bite so in 45 minutes of making zero progress on my own journey I taught her entitled Pig how to bite great game design blizzard now if you paid attention in History Class you know

About the famous shot herd round the world but if you didn’t it sounded like this and this and this and I was sick of my ears bleeding after only 11 levels of this so I made a deal with a pigtailed [ __ ] to send me to the land of the big

Sexy elves where this tall drink of milk taught me how to use bows so the classic wow ASMR could commence sour sauce on my [ __ ] she also told me a Chad with a seemingly madeup name and the forge of irons can teach me how to hold the big

Axes so I made a quick stop at bully Whiff’s place on the way home supposedly there’s a sophisticated subway system in this game that is safe as long as you don’t make a contact with the homeless Hood Lums down there and the ride is full of dank scenery this took me to

Goldshire the town known for being the biggest hangout place for players for its appearance in a South Park episode and for housing the most cringeworthy role playing scenarios but as I was just taking Howard for his morning walk because I now know that little [ __ ]

Will run away if I don’t give him a good life I stumble across a wanted poster hoger I barely know her hoger is basically the final boss for most 9-year-olds wow experience there’s only 55 creatures who have more more kills to their name and while I

Wanted to ask for help I know some guy with perfect hair on the internet would say something stupid about Glory if I did so there was only one thing to Do oh [ __ ] not Good I officially beat World of Warcraft but turns out hoger has Jack [ __ ] on the concept of caves when it comes to casualties in this game the problem here is you can just walk and dip your toes in the murder scene for a bit and then you turn back around and guess who’s

Back here’s Johnny many great men before me have failed here but the guy in town needed those boxes of Hillary Clinton’s emails and I’m not a [ __ ] side note if you run into me in the world and don’t pet Howard you are essentially dead to me anyways after a

Bit of casual everyday small talk with the normies I was on my way but here’s the thing I was here which is here and I needed to get here this meant the next hour of my life would consist of running through tunnels and Crossing very dangerous zones at one point Howard

[ __ ] around and most definitely found out # perfect parenting moment this brought me to the wetlands which is not only the perfect way to describe a room of women when this choed ungroomed budget Ed Sheeran walks through the door but it’s also a deadly place for anyone my age to walk through

Thankfully Hunters are easy mode so I had the thing that tells me when I’m about to drive by a cop plus I was nuts to butts with this big piece of I candy the whole time so I made it with ease all that was left to do was board the

Mayweather put on my Christopher Columbus cosplay and I would arrive in the wrong [ __ ] city after a totally not frustrated Google search I found the right boat and with it we were at the shores of Darkness now I guess word got out that a voiceless faceless League of

Legends YouTuber would be making a documentary on this Guild’s journey and now all these big shots started joining ay they could have made a movie about this man’s death and hardcore and it would have sold more copies than Barbie then we had Azie a man who knows both

The feeling of reaching max level and also dying at max level because he can’t keep his damag dick in his pants turns out the season Fame boys of HC W have something known as streamer Benny’s while they tag mobs and then have multiple max level characters kill them

At just the right point to give them full experience resulting in a highly calculated super optimized efficient way to level up all while I just spent the last 6 minutes wondering who the [ __ ] is dying to a school of fish but yeah some of these streamer Benny strats looked insane I saw one

Dude and his friend going full-blown Hitler on some harpies and this hidden Tech got him to level 18 in just over 4 hours I felt like I was going pretty fast as a level 14 so I had to compare I couldn’t pinpoint exactly what was holding me up in terms of leveling

Speed but the good news was that I was in darkshore this place breeds easy quests like Los Angeles breeds porn stars who failed at being actors you just tickle a few beached whales tell this bridge chump that his dead wife doesn’t want to see him anymore and it is just an XP orgasm

While you are here at one point I ran into wampy doing his streamer Benny Strat and as a guildy I figured I would go introduce Myself he flat out ignored me so I threw heat his way and later had a chat with Howard where I said don’t you ever let your future Fame make you think your own speedrunning goals are more important than laughing at a random guilty’s awful joke that said I was jealous of his

Leveling speed so I figured I would try out his Strat except the guy who I have killing my mobs didn’t know he was part of my Strat that didn’t last long but I felt bad and after the little garden gnome told me he had been stuck on this

Quest for 15 minutes I invited him only for him to drag the entire [ __ ] cave down to me while saying I have problems this little green-haired ninny muggins was bad news he kept trying to dry hump rocks as a bug to get out of the cave

Fast and all I wanted to do was be done with him and put anything that happened between us in the past but Howard and I had business to attend to on the other side of Azeroth I entered Westfall with one objective to find a defas Trapper

This is known as the most deadly mob in all of Hardcore wow outside of falling or drowning no other thing has taken more lives and wasted more virgins time than a defas Trapper and there was only one thing to Do I kneeled as Victor in front of my defeated opponent knowing what this momentous event would mean you were now looking at the most deadly creature in all of Azeroth I quickly started to realize the consequences of my new title for starters Howard’s cousins were starting to act jealous of him being adopted by

Such a big dick swinger I had to remind him that barking [ __ ] get stitches and the only thing they will ever amount to is having their livers used in a pie baked by some Farm hone named after salmonella I too was getting more attention as everyone wanted to take

Down the new king of Westfall and after seeing all the [ __ ] ways people are actually being killed during duels and clips I wasn’t about to trust this fully World buff level 12 even if she was a little fan maybe be a big fan And subscribe to the channel Miss Chila

Anyways I quickly learned from a man who doesn’t know how to pronounce defas the defas front is constantly shifting that my recent Victory took a bloody [ __ ] on the reputation of the biggest gang in Westfall and now we were in a full-blown gang war many members of the gang can be

Tracked by the red leather bandanas they wear this was music to my ears as I had no problem big dick strutting into their shitty Barns and demanding they give me their bandanas Howard however was iffy on messing with a gang but I reminded him where he’d be without me we busted

Said that joint and I was ready to start collecting my prizes inventory is but this particular Mission wasn’t all rainbows and shower sex no we had our fair share of casualties as I ran into one of Gandalf’s testicles who was fatally wounded he was laying there bleeding out still barely connected to

The world as I demanded answers his oo poetic Famous Last Words 555 will be remembered and I vowed to avenge this dyslexic leprechaun’s life and raid the panty drawers of the dead [ __ ] I killed inventory is full the initial plan was to be merciful and execute a quick and painless genocide of their

Ranks but after seeing how they just left Odin mmn to bleed out was enough to spark my villain Arc the Humane ways of killing gang members was over I would set fire traps and lure these Co aware dagger douchebags into them laughing at them while they slowly burned to death

Until I gathered every last bandana only to be thanked in the most generic way ever nice work person but more work was to be done they sent me to a seeming ly abandoned town to slaughter some of their civilians and I thought everyone had fled due to the war but as I was

About to check the local pub I heard Whispers turns out a surprise party featuring my own funeral was planned and I wasn’t about to RSVPs with my plus one to that PSY [ __ ] 360 no scoped my way into that bad decision almost got myself killed for the sake of this clip but it

All worked out it was at this time where my gildy said there’s proverbial cake in the break room which in this case meant World Buffs on a roof which was dank as I got to meet the fellas in person and they gave me a bunch of Buffs that made

Me run faster attack harder and turn into Keanu Reeves at this point Gan wanted me to waste the next 30 minutes of my life walking to a random town and I was about to tell him to [ __ ] off until he said this there is a rogue by

The name of Wy who owes me a favor and the Curiosity of why this grown man owed him was enough for me to get that cardio session in I met oneeyed Willie and he told me the whole backstory a random lady overheard and even she was shocked

To hear gri was into that stuff anyways it turns out you can’t visit a small incest ridden town as keano Rees and not be asked to do a few heroic things for them a little boy named Shawn said his girlfriend would let him get to second

Base with her if he found her Taylor Swift bracelet in the lake so of course I had to wingman the little horn dog out except he lacked a bit in the Riz department when he had me be the one to give it to her but hey at least someone

In town was trying to make moves you have a sturdy pair on you so if you’re interested then some called girl said her fat ass husband left his lunch at home and now I was going to be his Uber Eats to which he was like give that

[ __ ] some flowers for me and I’m thinking I already helped a tween perv touch his first TI you can fix your own marriage dude so I went back to Westfall with the gang information I got from the guy who went blind from getting gan’s jizz in his eye at twitchcon Edwin vanle

Was our Target and he said dank now I need you to waste an extraordinary long amount of time on the dumbest [ __ ] Quest ever where you mug a dude on his morning walk which could be anywhere in this entire zip code and after three short eternities I found him turns out

My time is about as valuable as a screen door on a submarine to our twitchcon pervert grind as he didn’t even need that messenger when they got all the info they needed from some dude that got fed up with politics preventing his promotions in the defi us gang so now he

Was going to agree to show me and Howard where his boss man’s secret little [ __ ] Hideout was and thus my final orders were given Edwin vanle must be assassinated now a few things needed to happen before I could take down this gang leader van queif guy first I had to

Wait for my 20 th birthday this meant I could learn new party tricks like aspect of the Cheeto which is quite possibly the best ability in the game for example let’s say you are alone in a bar thinking about what it would be like to not be an alcoholic

When a certified baddy sends you this you get up wave to the guys that you single-handedly keep employed and Then I’m fast as [ __ ] boy I’m fast as [ __ ] [ __ ] boy except when you get there she’s actually not alone and there’s also a [ __ ] child and Chris Hansen is there in a hat the second thing I needed was a group as Vander que cakes hangs out in a dungeon

Which meant we would need more people but we ran into a logistical issue I can’t find a tank but uh would you mind if we did four four DPS and a Healer now a little wow 101 for the viewers who have actually had sex before in World of Warcraft dungeons typically require one

Guy to take the hits one guy to heal the hits and three guys to deliver the hits but in this case we couldn’t find the most important guy so winging it was the suggestion but considering this is Hardcore wow and papaa would be mad if we died doing something dumb like this

There was only one appropriate response rap says let’s [ __ ] send it baby we greet each other like killer ninjas he pets Howard we Zone it and prepare ourselves for what will undoubtedly be the hardest thing we’ve ever done well kind of the defas [ __ ] kept sending more and more gang members to

Stop us but we eventually made it to a shitty Titanic replica that a bunch of goblins were Building inside a giant cave until all that was left was us and Eddie and May challenge the Brotherhood he fell with ease as he was no match to our five Gamers hyped up on power gum

And as I approached his dead corpse knowing that I just ended the entire gang war that was started from me naked bare knuckle brawling one of his peans I would take his head back as a sign of my victory I can’t carry anymore I’d like to thank the brave

Soldiers for their help in that mission tonight to give only fangs their first big victory in Azeroth sending the World of Warcraft and all of its [ __ ] NPC gangs a message that this Guild full of legitimate morons will one day conquer all turns out our Triumph in the dead

Minds was followed by some dark times for The Guild some of us were finding out the hard way that they aren’t the only thing who can summon slaves to do their slaughtering others were learning that if something casts a single spell for 12 seconds it’s probably not going

To feel nice when it comes out young Jeffy learned that hord City Guards will attack you from bum [ __ ] Egypt and then others who had add-ons making their mini map look dank and their action bars look like a lost and found table seemingly forgot to make use of the most important

Add-on their eyeballs and I think the realities of Hardcore wow was taking its toll on the well-being of the Guild this resulted in an emergency meeting where we all got called into the principal’s office to hear this how many people have died in the past day do you guys even give a Howard was struggling as well you see after news got out that he attended the vancle gang bang let’s

Just say he was absolutely drowning in pig puss but these westall Hogs clearly aren’t tested so he was having garia shits every few seconds like they were hiccups but with herpes I was starting to learn more about how the wow Community behaves for example when

Someone has a tag on a quest mob you need they will either a ignore you because they are a Chinese bot or B Be total Giga Chads stop their kill in the middle of the fight CC the Barney cosplaying murlock while they remember how to invite other people to their

Little murder date so you can get credit and I think these are the people who should be recognized anyways our fearless Guild leader decided to reward me for not dying by making my weapon look like a flaming hot Cheetos kebab and even though as a hunter this

Effectively would do nothing for me the style points had me treating every fight like I was recording flashy kills for a Halo 2 montage I had some loose ends to tie up in the 50 Shades of Gray Forest starting with a genocide of these Thugs who had a

Fetish for saying weird [ __ ] as you killed them mommy but in reality I was there to apparently grow old and die wondering how the hell to do this Quest I was on I euthanized at least two Baker dozen of those [ __ ] my mini map looks like the grammar police had a

Group orgy on it looking into this bowl wasn’t exactly helpful how hard I should get and these books were trying to grab a handful of dwarf dick every time I walked by I decided to just move on an uneducated man and challenge myself to what my guide warned me was a quest that

Is too hard to solo and I soon found out that’s because it’s almost impossible to not die of boredom watching this short King Joe Biden just walk around in circles trying to remember his own name for 20 minutes looking for some old pelvis bone only to remember he left it

At his side HHO house I gave him the name of a dementia medicine and decided I had about enough of dark Shore and onto a city named astrona emphasis on the Ass but I was here for one thing and that was to help my homeboy cure his [ __ ] of some crippling STD he gave her the initial gamer fuel we tried didn’t seem to do [ __ ] so he had me go to a little swamp Island to pick up a glowing

Godzilla Tic Tac I’m not sure why the horn dog thought this would work but here is where I also learned this was a daughter father relationship which makes this whole situation a bit strange but if he’s going to be loyal to one hoe in a town that is just crawling with local

Talent I guess I can look past incest and go pick some sparkling Pond pubes for us to try that didn’t do [ __ ] for the entitled ho so I was like sorry Mr White Moon your weird quasi illegal sexy stepdaughter a kink you had going on is

Just going to have to stay on pause as I gave them the doctor disrespect proverbial firm handshake and pieced out of there you see I booked a Carnival Cruise back to the other continent instead where I generously handed out some high level Hunter tips to an normi

I made a quick pit stop in Pearl Harbor because some drunk [ __ ] stain who survived the Titanic was in Town telling his story and I wanted to know if Rose’s ass was as dank as it was in the movie but all he would say was I’ll need a

Fresh drink if I’m to get a handle on this hangover and continue my tail and as someone who attended at least one year of college I knew just how to fix that situation it was around this time where I think I survived my first assassination

Attempt now I want to note that if you ever see someone struggling out in the world because some giant terrifying Pew Bush of algae whose favorite game is a apparently peekaboo wanted you to euthanize a bunch of Ratchet rabbits the best thing to do is run up there and

Give her some emotional support yes you could help but you know how the saying goes by a man of fish he eats for a day let a rogue die from over pulling their roll of priest when they go again but the whole point of this trip

And the reason I had to leave my incest fetish homie so urgently was to visit this make a wish City that I stopped by in esano Reeves last episode because Howard was starting to look a bit dated like he was in dire need of the latest

IOS update so we agreed to me getting a hall pass if it meant me teaching him new tricks and I knew exactly who I wanted to use it on I knew from using my toilet time by reading hardcore wow forums that this particular pig doesn’t [ __ ] around so I

Thoughtfully played it pretty well dazing him and then putting the bacon over I to which he still came out and slapped me for half my health before eventually agreeing to be my [ __ ] I was starting to worry I would enjoy having such a powerful Pig too much and that a tough break up

Conversation was in store psych I named this smelly bastard little slave and tried everything in my power to get his ass killed only for Blizzard’s buggy ass code to make everything attack me instead the second I got what I needed from him I commanded him to run in the lake and drown himself

I reunited with Howard held up on my end of the deal and guiltily told him about my infidelity I could see the look in his eyes and even though I didn’t agree I knew this was something he had to Do until some [ __ ] Good Samaritan decided to come and completely [ __ ] on Howard’s Glory but we all know who would have won that fight right guys but Howard’s Revenge aside it was a big day for us as we had to attend our first streamer Guild meeting I was excited to

Be a part of such an elite group until the meeting consisted of three hours of Mind numbing yelling mainly coming from some guy named Russell so I had to outplay the mechanic and then try to sneak out but Howard’s growing Fame had me busted and I wasn’t going to deny him

Pets from this chick so I went back and learned my lesson and never tried to sneak out of that meeting again a few moments later we might have to get out of here you know I’m really upset about my whole pizza party Friday thing I don’t care that is entirely unacceptable

Behavior in chance and I completely like I’m having such a bad day like I’s out here too R’s vibing dude but in my defense it’s because I heard Papa SoDo say this uh and Target dummies are required from now on so I spent the rest of the meeting leveling my engineering

And considering I started that ear bludgeoning experience where I had to apologize to my headphones afterwards I came out of it with some dank ass Shades Plus Engineering turned out to be the bee’s knees considering on deadly four packs after I nuked the little gray

Ball sack in the back I can hit a fat AOE Wombo Combo with my man-made Dynamite straight Hiroshima style and since this is just a wow tips Channel full of info that [ __ ] boy ay would never know here’s another one when you are running past a class who can give

Buffs turning around to help them kill their mob will psychologically outplay them into giving you their Buffs without even having to ask it works every time for example I wanted this mage’s intellect buff easy godamn peasy just help him nuke that bird and Walla you have your buff oh

Anyways it was time for me to lose my duskwood virginity which in this case meant having to turn the brightness on my screen just about to Max settings so I could see more than 10 ft in front of me turns out fit’s BFF is now a Hermit

Who needs help wiping his own ask not to mention Joe Biden’s speech writer lives out here I can’t escape them monsters in Raven Hill and oh couldn’t be only harmless Jitters I quickly learned that while in the US you drive on the right side of the road and in some EU

Countries you get the left side of the road but in duskwood you stay the [ __ ] off the road entirely because of a big walking Godzilla sperm cell named Stitches who kills more World of Warcraft Gamers than the concept of loneliness itself he is so deadly that one of the four hardcore servers was

Literally named after him and you can always tell when he’s around because you’ll walk by some [ __ ] and notice she stopped and turned around to see what happens to you and that’s when you should immediately know that the patrolling jiz rag is close and while me and Howard might not

Be the heroes that dark Shire wants tonight we would be the heroes that they need psych it was all for the clip take notes lazy ho that’s how to be a proper hooker and while I promise you’ll see the epic battle with the Stitch [ __ ] soon enough I had some dangerous matters

To attend to before I first had to find the proverbial Vladimir Putin of the red Ridge canions euthanize the rabbit and bring its paw back to some bumbling Muppet and while this Mage wanted help I wanted my Glory so my plan was to path through the low-level s bunnies in a way

Where his younger ass couldn’t follow but he arrived in time to ask me to make this assassination into a group project I remember how I felt when that Chinese bot gave me the shaft on the beach so I let my people pleasing personality get in the way of Glory but I figured I

Would get an intellect buff out of it only to stand there waiting to be blessed like I was speaking a different [ __ ] language before eventually deeming at a lost cause just confirming that the biggest noobs play Mages in this game outstanding anyways the leveling guide that my virgin ass paid

Money for was now telling me to skip the next Quest if I lack confidence and I’m thinking clearly Tommy salami doesn’t read the papers if he thinks that I think I’m a [ __ ] but I quickly learned it’s because between the groups and the patrols you can quickly find yourself in

A worse spot than a raw cucumber in an all female prison and this proved to be the case during one fight when Howard chose to be negligent after I told him to come back to me deciding to invite the entire neighborhood over to say hey

And this was going to be the end I thought my piece of [ __ ] Pig was low I had two on me with a Caster coming and there were logistical issues with my Escape Route but that’s when I remember the wise words of Papa soda Target dummies are Required this bought me enough time to survive and then even though Howard wasn’t as lucky a sexy elf who identifies as a cat agreed to be my inter and pet until the battle was over needless to say I expected more out of Howard but I also knew I was just as

Much to blame for being a bad trainer this was where I lost lost my macro writing virginity jotting down two genius lines of Elon Musk quality code that will one day save me and my RAID from Howard’s occasional attitude problems and like a true software engineer I had to test my code Howard

Sendeth Howard cometh I would say to ensure it would work and after 2 minutes of feeling like a code hacker genius I was ready to [ __ ] up fangor this Quest is supposed to be hard but something about the adrenaline from my near-death experience and the confidence I got from writing codes so

Good it could probably self-drive cars with a few more lines this whole battle was easy breezy beautiful cover girl but me gracefully Moon walking through content was about to end as my own Survival was now going to rely on some random normies I hired off the

Streets to fight in the red Ridge war against these Trend taking ogres and considering our first pull was less organized than asmin Gold’s bedroom I had my concerns the Mage was polymorphing targets with 3% health and the Warlock was playing his own solo adventure and fearing his mob into other

Orc when he wasn’t too busy disconnecting from the McDonald’s Wi-Fi so let’s just say we weren’t going to be pushing Arena rating with this mly crew but as a League of Legends player I’m used to dealing with inbred donkey teammates and so I figured I would just

Show how equipped I am to properly lead in a way that ay could only dream of assassination Numero Uno was in the books and my second task with these twerps was to loot orbs off of the jacked ones wearing dresses 1 2 3 but for a lack of better words [ __ ] got

Real when we entered the castle another group was trying to rescue Fiona slay the dragon to and I decided to be chivalrous while arranging a safe plan to collude so that everyone would get their nut this was great until we somehow nabbed the tag and they got

Pissy and decided to flee the crime scene what started as a two group raid to kill a single Elite mob was now a board certified [ __ ] fest and there were about to be casualties the startled Muppet was running away from us and behind walls making any chance chance of

Receiving heels of pipe dream he had two on him with four Health when I randomly had a revelation Target d i pinned that [ __ ] like a tail on a donkey watched the focus Target of angry orc number four swap to it and I’m proud to say we all

Survived the Epic shitfest of stonewatch keep Legend has at that other group who abandoned ship is still fleeing like vaginal cowards to this day [ __ ] at this point I had to head back to the laggy City because some [ __ ] was going down in the Stormwind basement and some arrogant douchebag needed help you

Probably won’t make a difference turns out the refugee defia [ __ ] stains from the gang war i w in Westfall were captured and being held down there to serve as the presumptuous royal family slaves and yes I’m allowed to say that because they were all white the orders were to slaughter these [ __ ] and

Aside from a slight disagreement on how fast or slow we should be doing it as if my group was a married couple arguing in the bedroom the mission was a great success I must say after a half hour I hardly expected you to come out I wanted

To tell that oneeyed bastard that it was actually only 23 minutes but after having successfully LED two teams through group content I had some words for someone else do you actually think you’ll be the better Hunter oh dude I’m going to smash yeah don’t worry about me I just want to

Show you something okay this is what you’re up against we’re talking about clearing MC now for those of you non-w players his response in the form of a flex was not only like repping a proud Badge of unintentional celibacy but it was also pretty much the equivalent of

Showing that he scored A600 on his SATs and effective no one in the world has done better but what he didn’t know was what he was up against dude yo RAV is uh what the [ __ ] this guy RAV is Juiced that’s right a blushing Hunter who may

Or may not have run out of arrows and had to resort to playing melee Hunter for half the dungeon to which I still top charts [ __ ] so all I’m saying is it’s going to be Lonely at the Top for me Meanwhile my other guildies were throwing a raging house party in

Goldshire when papaa was out of town and considering the amount of drugs and sex that was taking place some of the officers were not happy we are in only things man take some pride in that and as a role model in this Guild I just want to say I don’t condone this

Partying behavior and I’m disappointed in anyone who was there instead of leveling and seeing how our fearless leader knew I was grinding my short dwarf dick off instead of partying he met me deep in the moist marshes and gave me a Gift I didn’t know how to thank him and all I could think of was to show him that when he said Target dunies are required I listened now since I know my audience is an all wow Geeks let me explain the reason why I was [ __ ] my pants over

This item for starters it was purple quality which outside of some rare super virginity scenarios is the best type of item you can get in the game and second it was a weapon the combination of these these two things meant that it would sell for over a gold to a local bow

Connoisseur and I’d be 1% closer to getting my Mount farewell it was also around this time that I hit Level 30 this meant I could meet up with a slender male elf sex doll in the middle of bum [ __ ] ashenvale to learn an ability called feain death and

The best way I can describe why this is valuable is that I can now tell a diabetic deformed penguin that his chick has a fatty and then be like op just kidding homie and he won’t want to beat me up anymore if people want to ignore Howard and his

Contributions I can now let them hit voicemail and say you will be dealing with my pig from now on anyways I had one final piece of business in this fantasy land forest and that was to finally help my homeboy cure his daughter SL stripper lover of her AIDS

He claimed this was finally the medicinal fix to her whing around I wasn’t impressed but I couldn’t stay any longer as I had to meet up with a few guildies for an organized coup against the Civilized Pigs and the Razer fan crawl but as we were waiting I was presented with a

Proposal a duel to the death guildy versus guildy loser will have to delete their character these are strictly prohibited in the guild as the one and only time this happened before Dad’s reaction went something like this you’re both at fault you are both at fault I do

Not give a coward he is a coward oh God okay I’m going to go and after sinking over 50 hours of game time into this character there was only one thing to do Some may call it the start of a villain Arc Others May say it was heartless but everyone will now Respect Rap wrath water Earth fire fear long ago Gamers lived together in harmony then everything changed when video games became microtransaction ridden sweaty over stimulation piss fests with toxic turbo virgin players

Only blizard devs creators of the best mmor RPG in 2004 as well as many sexual harassment law lawsuits could bring joy back to Gamers and when the world needed them the most they released another retail expansion close to 100 years past and the wow Community discovered a new

Hardcore game mode where death equals delete and one mistake means months of your life wasted official servers were created and named after the most dangerous creatures in their Universe defias Pillager the proverbial fire Benders of Westfall Skull Rock a cave that Alliance players use in arguments to prove that players

Are the reason shampoo has to come with instructions nek rash a washed up Wetlands Commander surrounded by an army of his simps and Stitches the most deadly Patrol south of the Azeroth equator a weaponized diabetic jiz stain with a 0 to 60 on par with a modern-day Tesla whose favorite game is surprise

You’re a dead [ __ ] [ __ ] together these creatures have made hardcore wow a giant waste of time for countless kids but only ravh master of all four deadly things that dumb players died to can stop them now the first element was a cakewalk to master defas pillagers get their reputation from being aristic ass

Hats and the average experience can be best summarized by a South Park clip that I quote at least once a week no I don’t want have to start over at the graveyard no but unfortunately for Miss Sizzle tits here I’ve already killed her boss’s boss’s boss when I was still a we little

Ass so her attempts were nothing more than laughable back to ellwin for you [ __ ] mastering Skull Rock was equally as uneventful as a YouTuber boxing match as I was basically the LeBron James of dwarfs entering a Catholic grade school dribbling contest to the point where none of these Orcs from Mordor or their

Blue [ __ ] even wanted to make I contact with me on my way in the main threat in here is a man whose name could be some Urban Dictionary slang for a blow job and while yes he’s a big threat the the thing responsible for more deaths is actually the genie that he’s

Let out of the bottle I figured it’d be appropriate to let the pets play with each other and then when he tried to pick a fight with a pig I got pissed thinking you wouldn’t have the balls to attack a grown man like that and he was going to pay the Price obviously the age Gap made mastering this element a bit easy nekros the first EU realm is appropriately where [ __ ] got messy my initial scouted report showed that Commander cuck suck here definitely won the popularity contest in terms of how many butt buddies he had surrounding him

I pulled up a conversation as context into the deadliness of this man where some [ __ ] wanted to group up to take him down I asked how many he has he said he wanted to go with four little fear mongering [ __ ] boys and when I asked if

He thought I could solo he promptly said negative Ghost Rider it was only poetic that I then ran into their little rig group on my way to Glory [ __ ] I figured I would clear the backside and then spectate their attempt to see what I was dealing with when I accidentally did

This clearly this touched a nerve not only with nek rash’s book club but also with the [ __ ] boys who did days of prep for this Mission they ended up securing a sloppy Slaughter between the 16 of them and it was at this point almost 4 weeks into my World of Warcraft Journey

That I ran into my first League of Legends player anyways it was once again my turn to master the third hardcore element all while I was being called a H hard and I will always be confused why people say Hunters are an easy Class I nabbed me the cabesa for my credit and then because I’m Petty I shared my Triumph with the lead player and then there were Stitches the hardest of the hardcore elements to master there’s no one that solo stitches that guy is impossible to solo this weaponized Godzilla sperm cell

Has a body count that can only be rivaled by Logan Paul’s fiance no sane human attempts to kill this as the local Town lives in constant fear of him getting the munchies and most conversations with this jailbroken ball of jiz typically result in a Target dummy angle where you just hope to have

Gotten enough Distance by the time he starts chasing you again after how easy mastering the first three hardcore bosses were I went into this with confidence but seeing as my first 10 shots barely tickled this angry ball of puss and with Howard already having taken a bloody

Beating I was forced to run away and reconsider if I had what it takes to be the hardcore Avatar I went full-blown Pimp My Ride Howard Edition my uncle started infusing my items with pheromones and all sorts of little [ __ ] Buffs all for my rematch a local Pastor gave Howard the stamina

He would need to be in the ring with that monster and then there was just one last thing I needed given to me by Papa soda himself who at this time was learning that I was about to fulfill my destiny as the hardcore Avatar [ __ ] RAV is going to

Try and solo stitches like an idiot for his YouTube channel and when he realized there was no talking me out of my decision he took the next Bald Eagle straight to the local town to watch but he knew he was not allowed to help he who’s destined to do this alone I will

Let him Die oh feain death get him back on Howard Howard’s health is looking good I managed to keep Howard in good health but we had bigger problems oh he’s [ __ ] o which meant it was doomed and I couldn’t face the reality that was in front of me how is is going to go down

And even though I hated him for it let Howard die Howard served well but you got to play this yourself he was Right I was now alone and the target of this big fat baby gravy’s wrath with no one but myself to fulfill my destiny he’s got a new pet it’s Watcher Jordan execute FaZe was Among Us and I knew it would be poetic to defeat him in

The center of town to show all the shitty City boys that there’s nothing to fear when I’m around but it wasn’t over yet oh no stitches is coming if I couldn’t finish him myself at this point I knew no one else could tamed another pet you got the

Goon Squad one last cred and I officially have mastered the hardcore elements all by myself alone with no help from outside factors I claimed this diabetic snots femur to hold as a trophy on my right hip for the rest of my journey as a sign of me being the Avatar

But despite my victory I was empty all I could think about was the day I made that little hog my slave and immediately made him kill his own brother the breakups the makeups supporting each other towards their goals okay this is going to take a while

He died a godamn hero for the noble cause of RAB mastering the elements but I feared my journey would be over if it meant Howard would not be by my side I was about to give up hope and go back to shitty League of Legends and leave all

Of this behind as a distant memory when an angel Appeared Together with Howard RAV the Avatar was ready to Save the World of Warcraft apparently word hadn’t yet spread that I defeated the demon of duskwood as players were still looking like they were about to [ __ ] themselves on the road and despite me trying to calm their nerves I knew the best way to show them that RAV the Avatar could

Conquer all would be to Smurf on the remaining Elite quests in the area more Lam is the golden grave digging boner boy that has more people creating fresh level ones in Ellen than anytime asmin gold starts a new character but he clearly didn’t know who he was up

Against so I let Howard introduce himself and then I promptly one shot the [ __ ] then some Undead David Blain was apparently spooking couples in the bedroom of this house so I went up only to find out he was currently taking a meeting so I figured I would let these

Scrubs build up their confidence by taking him down themselves before deciding that I deserve a little credit for at least being there but this is where I realize that the lore behind some of these quests is beyond [ __ ] up place his own heart within the bosom of

His dead spouse so just to summarize this random Quest a psychopath somehow removed his own heart and shoved it up the [ __ ] of his dead wife and now for some ungodly reason the people in town want it I found the grave as Howard was like bro it smells like ass here and I

Was like well according to the disturbing Quest details means we are in the right place so I tickled the the dirt hit a bit of parkour and then killed that freaky fetish bride the thought of digging through her dead colon to get her husband’s heart was disgusting and Howard sure wasn’t going

To do it but I knew the townsmen would sleep better at night knowing I had what you’ve done it just to confirm this praise wasn’t because I slayed the jiz stain final boss stitches plaguing their town you have done a great thing for our people Adventurer it was because I dug a

Dude’s heart out of his dead wife’s anus your name will remain in our annals forever anyways I ran into a little gnome whose name could describe my entire documentary but then I managed to get triggered by my first escort quest in the game please help you see this

Douche was clearly having a case of the Mondays I figured the dude would be eternally grateful that aunos saved his ass from being eaten by a tribe of mutated apes and literal alligators only for him to act like [ __ ] Prince Harry being escorted into his daddy’s coronation I had some Choice words for

Him but the dude wanted no part in the mission to save his own life apparently and while being toxic towards an NPC may have not been my proudest moment I felt he needed a taste of his own own medicine it was at this point where whoever wrote my leveling guide must

Have decided to phone it in one day since it was just like a yo [ __ ] it I don’t know go kill some [ __ ] for an hour and while the fastest levelers would have accepted this thrown some hentai on the second Monitor and then grinded it

Out with a half chub for the next hour I chose a different route you see there’s a chapel in the big city where a priest has been entirely too happy to see me since I was a little boy but in the basement there’s a dude dressed like a

Habachi Chef who is all like bro your guide wants you to waste 45 minutes of your life killing beasts n I’ll save you from that boredom just follow these steps first take a flight out of town down to that bay named after a literal ass there I’ve arranged for you to take

A transatlantic Cruise don’t make I contact with the others on that boat as it’s known to have some weirdos once you’re there you will take another flight on the calor Airlines but this is classic wow so there’s no direct flights to where you’re going so you’ll connect

Through a town that’s not exactly on the way there you’ll meet my gay love Anton and he will tell you about our old book club called The Scarlet Crusade and how we left because of their obsession with bowling he’ll have you spend another 10 minutes walking through quite possibly

The ugliest Zone in all of Azeroth until you arrive for your designated skeletal Slaughter he’ll be like there’s one small catch I need you to Kill 30 of these in a Zone where only six spawn at a time so I hope you remember to twiddle

Your thumbs for a bit but once you do serve that snoozefest just run the 17 miles back up to me and enjoy the scenery that can best be described as if a microsc scope zoomed way into an infected sperm cell from a man ridden with AIDS make him happy and he’ll be

Like dope now take another no direct flight back to that ratchet as Bay just in time to miss the next boat when you arrive back to the boardwalk you’ll just have one more super short flight to your last stop stiff jet lagged and having already wasted more than the hour you

Would have spent killing beasts you’ll get debriefed by a dude who is working on his cement driveway cosplay transmog set he will tell you that the next part of this gigantic waste of time is to find a group of people and that you’ll probably need to spam the entire server

Looking for others only to find a warrior who says he can’t tank with the plan to just not tell him that he’s the tank while thinking to yourself what’s the worst that can happen then you and your new group of butt buddies will need to spend another short 20 minutes

Walking through dangerous Zone sneaking around the back of horde Capital Cities and parkouring in ways that not everyone can keep up with and after close to 2 hours you will arrive at the most corrupt book club in all of the Eastern Kingdom Now I quickly learned that this is actually Four dungeons baked into one the first featured torturers with suffering victims who were in desperate need of RAB the Avatar to be their Hero by killing everyone including them whoopsie The Hunger Games game master was informing us to GTFO so after we

Finished the first to 4: we decided to wait until 11: to start the second except everyone else decided to go in at 10:5 9 because reading clocks is apparently rocket science now and this resulted in my getting stuck in a different lock out of the instance than

All of them anyways the butt buddies who left the book club said there were a few drama queens who needed killed and the first was the pet lover in the group release the he looked intimidating but they told me the weird things he does with those hounds and a jar of peanut

Butter at night so I wasn’t concerned then there was Arcanist douche canoe who was a tank and spank outside of when he cast detonate and you need to get out ASAP and it turns out having RP walk toggled on is an ideal so I may or may

Not have [ __ ] around and found out now small detour from this gripping book club drama story line I should mention that I met a certified baddy in the Forge of iron who said that rumor is this particular library has a copy of the Kamas Sutra and I quote bring it to

Me and perhaps together we can unlock the secret so obviously there was some incentive for me to find it while I was there yeah baby the third dungeon was basically 47 hallways of scarlet simps that all looked the exact same and after 30 minutes that you face Herod who has

Two phases the first is a tank and spank and the second is snack after he dies all the fraternity pledges come rushing and showing how useless they are and then we enter the final and most deadly of the four dungeons the cathedral this is where Howard started to feel the

Repercussions of me telling a warrior he didn’t have to tank while actually relying on him to tank and our group’s Rogue was about to learn a very real lesson to not joke about Howard’s life you see we made it to the final Church where all these devote simps were

Saying their prayers to the big dog in charge all ready to run at anyone who challenges his authority of deciding what the next book everyone will be reading is and while this coup Against The Crusade had been as smooth as a Riz Master’s pickup lineup until this point

Things were about to take a messy turn Infidel they must be purified tickling the captain’s toes triggered the fire alarms and over 30 simps were now on their way I looked back knowing that this would be the last time I ever saw our healer alive The Crusade demanded more casualties and my tank who didn’t think he was my tank was in line to be next I prepped a last ditch Target dummy knowing it wouldn’t do [ __ ] but I wasn’t

The only only fangs member thinking on their feet and Patty managed to spare his Life we paid our respects to our fallen comrade and vouched to avenge his death The only issue was we now had no healer a fake tank and two people who didn’t know this Fight Arise My Champion your side Believe I went back to cement covered Sammy to tell him that that drama filed book club is no more so in summary instead of grinding mobs for 45 minutes I spent 7 hours traveling the world engaging in Petty High School drama and getting another player killed all to accomplish

The same amount of progress on my journey to 60 and that my friends is what it’s like to play World of Warcraft turns out the death I witnessed in my dungeon had jack [ __ ] on the sadness of another death from our Guild a level 60 Warrior fell victim to the

Principle of classic WoW known as stupid [ __ ] and after watching the clip 600 times I eventually figured out what happened they were fighting a pack of gang green ridden bald diabetics when he rushed in and shouted something that weakens them a little law-abiding citizen cockroach fell victim to this

Shout got pissed off and decided to quietly run off and tell the big man in charge an endgame boss gets aggroed and starts throwing slaps like he’s an alcoholic stepfather two more swollen sumo wrestlers in body armor spawn and their healer gets erased he uses his

Potion of Petri in an attempt to freeze and hope they stop attacking him but the timing is more out of sync than a symphony with a fully de string quartet so two months of work get ruined in a fraction of of a second and in my brief time learning more about the streaming

World all I can say is 07 or something I on the other hand was living my best life I celebrated my 40th birthday which outside of hitting level cap is the biggest leveling achievement in the game the days of walking like a peasant were behind me as I would join the ranks of

Shi who ride stees it was also at this point where we learned how to channel Howard’s anger issues into a productive Forum my Sensei and the forge of irons gave me a confusing speech about wolf packs I tend to think of myself as a oneman Wolfpack and now I know for sure

I just added two more guys to my wolf pack but this finally gave me the tools to grief [ __ ] that I don’t like and blame it on others for example I could add Howard to my wolf pack and then watch and laugh as he is permanently dazed trying to escape someone who is

Actively finger popping his [ __ ] 40 is also apparently the age when I get my dad bod strength and Confunction in heavy male armor which meant the days of me wearing a condom on my head where were over then I got to take a trip down memory lane through Narnia’s [ __ ]

Where I first met Howard as I thought to myself look how far he’s come what are you doing step bro but most importantly it was time for me to stick it to those [ __ ] at Ford and buy me a ram now these are expensive and hardly anyone

Can afford them right when they turn 40 so you are probably thinking he is just a spoiled [ __ ] with streamer benefits but let me explain why that’s not the case I used an investment strategy where someone told told me at a young age if I

Invest my money in the hot men bank then it will double each time it’s returned I had no Market data on this bank’s performance and nothing to trust so I started with small amounts gaining more confidence and risk tolerance in my investments until I put in the final contribution that would grow taxfree

Into the amount I would need to buy my furry vehicle but when I put my whole net worth on the line the investment never came back so I resorted to getting fat handouts and a shady dive in booty Bay smoking cigars with the little wizard like we were the tape Brothers of

Azero and then my investment also came back so yeah I could pay for this [ __ ] in cash I named my Ram Rebecca and together with Howard we would be the sexiest threesome in the World of Warcraft it was now time to go back to wasting time as my next objective was

Apparently to get pissed off at blizzard some unpaid in turn in 2004 must have been like all right we are going to add a patrolling anorexic mail men in the game have her tiptoe around somewhere in the vicinity of this entire galaxy and have an entire Quest chain riing on

You [ __ ] finding her so you can steal some love letter she’s holding I tried using random abilities I found in my spell book but I knew this was doomed and after close to 90 minutes of pain and suffering I still couldn’t find the [ __ ] stain at one point I thought I hit

The jackpot only to realize those were just the elite guards that took a bloody piss on one of my guildies and then on my 17th lap after crop dusting a human Mage with Rebecca’s stench she told me that I was about to run into her and her

Pack of butt buddies excepted for some ungodly reason called and sick to this particular parade like many other things in classic wow this turned into a godamn research project for me as I figured I would just camp out at her spawn point until the Bony maale Man shows up for her next

Shift and as I got close I heard this which I’m conditioned like a dog to no means the mob I’ve been searching for since I was a we little lad as near and marked as a moon but I couldn’t see it anywhere so I deployed 500 IQ strats to

Send Howard in like a blood hound only for him to stop like an insubordinate swine turns out I got classic wow and the mob that just spawned decided to disappear my strategy now turned into killing every last Hulk cosplaying ogre hoping that they are boys with the male

Man and she’ll have to come out to stop their genocide I even met a tall sexy ass Elf on the Shelf who was also looking to punch the evasive UPS driver in the Cooter so I figured I would exploit him for his kindness tell him I’m looking up the quest details but

Really I was full-blown AFK letting him do work for me thinking I just hacked the leveling system and there was no no way this could backfire a few moments Later my AFK arrogance was going to be the end of me as while I was jerking off in the bathroom my character was getting his ass kicked in Howard was feeling too passive to defend me and my only shot of survival was now this Good Samaritan who

Wasn’t looking too hot himself the ogre was enraging my health was dropping and I was about to have the most depressing post-nut Clarity in my life when I returned to my computer but Then not even close I told him the whole thing was totally a prank to test his loyalty and then I rewarded him handsomely for his efforts anyways after 2 hours with the mailman still playing hookie I said [ __ ] it joined up with some guildies to hit the Downs of Razer

Fin and after seeing the [ __ ] way our comrade passed away earlier I gave myself one job throughout this entire dungeon and you may laugh but here you see that same [ __ ] could have happened if I didn’t shoot the little [ __ ] rodent in his gossip spreading grape vine head and thanks to my

Mechanics we smurfed on that [ __ ] and I got this cotton ball looking stat stick as a reward I then had to venture into some ginger Pew Bush desert and quickly learned that it’s not called the good lands for a few reasons there’s giant posies of weaponized sumo wrestlers who

Hang out in packs of like 12 one of Dumbledore’s left nuts followed me around for 6 years wanting me to volunteer as tribute to his own virginity hosted fully trinket at Hunger Games the Zone’s nickname is the Dust Bowl probably because you miss every attack as if your eyeballs just deep

Throated a bucket of sand and the quest details sounded a hell of a lot like the breakup speech my high school girlfriend gave me when she wanted to start dating seniors instead their bodies are stronger and larger and therefore more prone to having pieces large enough for my

Tests so naturally I had to get out of there and switch things up can I have gold for my Mount thanks guys RAV wants gold for the mount um I just got one question and how much gold does RAV deserve gold guys I need 80

Gold oh my God bro you might have to do uh some begging for some of it that’s what I’m doing now good point if you can make it out here in 5 minutes I will make it 50 gold stopwatch started will he make it aspect of the

Cheetah aspect of the cheetah he can make it right but he doesn’t have aspect of the cheat wait he said I’ll even get my last giblet oh my God that is some [ __ ] that is cocky 3 and A2 minutes can he actually make it out here holy [ __ ] 9 8

7 6 5 4 3 2 1 oh my my God that was that was pretty that was pretty like on point there truly should we have had it so we had to open up trade maybe bro did he just Mount what the [ __ ] dude what the [ __ ] is this a joke

What there’s no [ __ ] way there ain’t no [ __ ] way I [ __ ] ain’t no [ __ ] way this little [ __ ] Mounted nice Mount did you just and after crushing that first impression I had to meet up with a few other guildies the proverbial Big Shot Warriors and my presence in this run wasn’t going to go unnoticed R going melee okay you see his off hand no what

Wait what is this guy doing he’s very proud of his kill dude that’s actually so badass he’s throwing kn let’s go rev did you guys pet Howard or no aspect of the pack by the way glad you could join us rev they also didn’t notice that I needed on every

Single piece of gear that dropped that entire run but when it came time for the final boss things got serious all right we’re doing this old style careful I don’t even know this guy’s mechanics but I’m sundering a lot of mobs I taunted it all right we got five

We’re getting big here I can’t do that yet that ability isn’t ready yet not ready yet oh [ __ ] AOE shot AOE shout after that usually if you have retail like ta and then mocking blow and then AOE key servants defend the distance I’m not going to lie I don’t have Taun I

Don’t have taunt retail mocking blow what else did you say AOE shot I don’t have any of that bound it’s a lot of ads you guys you guys are the [ __ ] tanks hello Target dummy this isn’t ready yet to my execute Phase we defeated Lord Stone tits only for him to drop a gigaby item for warriors God damn that’s huge wait I guys I need that I need that too as well as idiots playing Hunter and while the ethical thing to do would be to pass on this I clearly wasn’t making a big

Enough name for myself who is r I don’t know who this is and lessons had to be learned the [ __ ] is he did you just ninja all that he did um bro psychi passed on the Warriors purity ring the last thing I want to be called as a

Ninja as my plan is to be a team player in this Guild and I was about to prove this by avenging the deaths of my guildies the first death can best be summarized by this clip that I took wildly out of context I ran in there pulled everything on purpose said we’re

Were fine and then we died she died turns out she wasn’t streaming so you had to witness her demise from the POV of the kid who clearly missed when it came to his decision to attempt this Quest and considering the top of this boat looked like a Jack Sparrow cosplay

Contest while he in the third they pulled out of Hogwarts daycare were struggling to appear threatening Oh no you’re going to die you’re going to die the Healer got the aggro which turned into this I I I I no dad was less than happy to hear the

News I am no no no no I haven’t even seen the footage I haven’t even seen the death and what I took from the conversation is that this particular Quest is too deadly to attempt on Hardcore and should be skipped dumb extremely risky Quest everyone’s warning

You about this Quest and you still do it I tell you to calm down you’re going crazy so naturally this was the next Quest I wanted to do but with the plan to apply the lessons from soda’s rage like when a random normi asked to group

I remembered you don’t know who it is you don’t know this Mage you understand the difference between a stupid and a good good player and politely told him to piss off only to learn not 15 seconds later why grouping with that [ __ ] stain indeed would have been a

Mistake anyways the quest clearly says this take some of your most skilled comrades so I’m not sure why Emmy chose to bring this when she heard that but I was going to bring someone else the Guild’s Rogue tank Mr Azie a dear friend of mine and Howards and

Together we were going to avenge the death and after the warning signs dumb extremely risky Quest I knew we’d have to be clean with the kills the first boat I went down looking for Amber herd put a trap down and then said hey I have

A large net worth and like to get drunk knowing the bait would work as I posted up and just waited for her to come out wanting to sue me it worked like a charm and our Flawless execution was going to bring us to the captain who was already

[ __ ] dead so we opted into waiting in a small room in the middle of a ship where 17 Mobs Can respawn at any time while we wait for Captain Barbosa to get back from the store with the the milk only to be greeted with third degree

Burns and a hunter hitting him with the first person POV while his butt buddy was making a Better Door than a window and with that the first of three was down but as we approached the second ship we ran into one of those beastiality fetish sex elves who wanted

To join and you don’t know who the this person is that’s a no for me dog sorry soda’s orders and sure enough she quickly proved to have a room temperature IQ when she invited half the boat out of their quarters to kick her ass which I thought was hilarious until

They all decided I would be the consolation prize you got deated I then figured I would show her how to properly do this PLL and I think by ozy’s reaction I nailed the execution one uhoh uh-oh uh-oh lots lots lots we had a dog fight on our hands this time and I

Decided I’d rather bring this party onto dry land where there is potential for even more mobs I played a quick game of Follow The Iron grenading leader then I shoved a tide pot up Howard’s [ __ ] and told him to bite the cosplaying C but there were too many so I had to play

Dead on TV let them give my rogue tanks some attention and wither them down one by one when I saw the second captain I couldn’t hold back my inner 12-year-old and said I’d tell everyone how he Goblin these nuts before heading to the third and final boat now for the record the

Proper way to execute this pull would be to request a private meeting with two of them before talking to the rest of the family then put one over ice while you deal with the second and it’ll be the cleanest double homicide on this side of the Eastern kingdoms but I chose a different Approach I failed to account for how hard it is to resist petting Howard so the entire extended family came rushing out which resulted in a brief scare for Mr Osborne but we did it and were ready to face the last and most deadly Captain we’d ever

Seen hey my you’re a tall one I debated showing that Emmy died to the Army who reports to this knee nibbling garden gnome and even though we both laughed at this little cake topper somehow reaching the top of the blood cell totem pole we had a mission and that was to teabag he

Who killed Emmy before parting ways until the next time F’s death was next and this one was less a matter of in-game danger but rather a combination of external factors she was going on her 10th straight hour of streaming a game that’s been the same for 20 years likely tired and invested

Into something dank on her second Monitor and the duo she invited to her party was also tapped out checking if this was the same fandy he watches on a different site late at night while doing the Five Knuckle Shuffle on the old piss pump and the combination of neither of

Them fully paying attention proved to be a lesson on how quick it can all end I went to that same bloody anus of a Zone knowing that avenging this death would be much easier for me since I was neither sleep deprived like fandy or jerking off like the hunter in her group

As I started the escort and everything was going some [ __ ] threw some heat Howard’s way and had to pay the price but that was the only action at F’s funeral site that said for those of you on your seats wondering how the rest of this Quest

Goes you help the dude deal with his crippling or archnophobia he complains about his asthma and then shows you where his old 9 to5 was as if you give a [ __ ] turns out his old co-workers thought he was a [ __ ] sucker and then after 15 minutes of escorting this short

Dude that didn’t shut up once he flat out gets JFK right in front of your face so you loot his inheritance and that’s it Miss K’s death had me feeling less sad but rather more mad mad at myself for not betting the other gildy more gold that he would die within 24

Hours of having to play on his own and the lesson to be learned here is that these mechanical chickens are not to be [ __ ] with because for some ungodly reason there are large groups of Yetis who Advocate against their release he had more than one opportunity to just

Piss off and live to fight another day but with the ongoing recession I get that times are tough and he was undoubtedly understaffed in the thinking Department that night so in a series of unfortunate events that can be summarized as guy does really dumb [ __ ] he joined Emmy in going back to elwin

Someone help please this admittedly was not a quest I should have tried to avenge solo but as RAV the Avatar he who is committed to showing the guild that he has their backs and that he’s better than M KF at the game I had to do it I

Knew that a threeome with a few yetis would spawn soon so the strategy was to clear the area first but this ended up backfiring in a big way as my timing was worse than a broken metronome I told Howard he’s got a deal with one of the

Big guys while I let the other two slap around my metal [ __ ] but I had to deal with harambe over here spitting in my face I wanted Howard to peel but I knew that chicken was almost dead so no bore or bomb was spared in getting them off I

Had to fake my own death so that I could survive to tell people that Bigfoot does exist and he and his brothers tried to put me in a box as the first wave in this [ __ ] Fest of an escort was over I had a feeling more were coming but

Just to show how proper preparation prevents poor performance the next orgy I had was smoother than an oil tit as we blew up monkey Numero Uno told the second to chill out while I backed up to the three-point line and went full-blown Cincinnati Zoo on his brother and with

That the second wave was complete the third and final wave would be a different story however this time there were four and despite trying to execute the same game plan I managed to fail the quest almost immediately for some ungodly reason after a certified [ __ ] for me to

Kill the four pack I went back to the footage to realize that my [ __ ] ass piece of poultry just kept running while I was fighting off the entire County so he could Escape I ran all the way back just in time to see someone else run off

With my girl as if I didn’t Reserve this retry so I left the cave and acted like I didn’t care what went down on their date only to immediately whip out my binoculars to watch this Chad P fail sure enough he was in Camp Miss kif on

This one as this was clearly doomed you could see him running back to me trying to ask for help but I was like na bra if I wanted to hear from an [ __ ] I’d fart as I just waited for the chicken to die as my C A Hall ass back and NAB me

The next round I smurfed on the first two packs but this time I was prepared for that [ __ ] to see the finish line and bust his nut too early once again sure enough that dumb [ __ ] rooster is oblivious to the world around him once again so I need to literally show

These rabbit’s tra stamping my anus right in front of his beak to get him to just wait for the rabbit AR to do his job 1 2 3 4 and after a less than coordinated Quadra kill I told him off then walked him down the hill and with that Miss K was

Avenged the last death came early on and only fangs as Cory the guy was the first high level in The Guild to meet his demise when he attempted something that I quote yeah this looks safe zanel the outcast is a seemingly harmless troll but he sticks a twig in the ground that

Has more skeletons coming out than a g Bar’s Halloween party so while he did Kill the main guy the extended family of that trolls butt buddies ended his journey I’m actually dead yeah I’m actually dead I knew that avenging this particular death would not be enough on

Its own and I would have to use it to send a message to the World of Warcraft In My Own patented RAV the Avatar Way yet so to the roaches in asmongold’s cancer pit of a twitch simp Guild if your guildy isn’t willing to avenge your death by butt naked brawling a dangerous mob with a thrown weapon is that truly a guild you are proud to be in it turns out I can single-handedly start and end

Gang wars in Westfall Master the hardcore elements and overcome challenges where others have fallen but I’ll still never be as good as a mage I learned that at this level they can just go full-blown heard dog gather a crowd tell them to sit still and then summon a

Godamn snow day on top of them until they all die and while this is apparently risky and hardcore it just meant an opportunity for me to save an elen hottie and then while she is drinking her loaf of bread try to run some epic Riz on her but while The Magicians could just

Mass genocide mobs I was stuck questing and the things I was being asked to do were starting to get weird some paranoid drug dealer apparently buried piles of cocaine all over the zip code and now wanted me to go dig them up saying that the only way to find them is to wear

This dish satellite sponsored helmet while I was out there beautiful big booby nipples but while this dude just wanted his dope every other Town’s folk I talked to all wanted to send me to the same place zul faric zul farak zul far zul faric to the West a highlevel

Dungeon which from my research is responsible for many deaths including gildy so I would need to ensure that my group was full of Hardcore Geniuses for starters I knew I needed to get one more quest one that my Mage already but couldn’t properly communicate if it was sharable I didn’t

Want to spend 10 minutes walking through dick swallow Marsh and getting swamp ass but I needed to make sure it was actually sharable first I knew that quests are sharable if this button is red and not sharable if this button is gray so I asked the little Hogwart

[ __ ] to hover that Quest and tell me if it’s red or gray to which he said no and then gave me attitude while also contradicting his already confusing answer so then I was like okay you [ __ ] Muppet simple question is the damn button read to which he said no

Which according to to my demonstration earlier means it’s not sharable only to then immediately say it is sharable so naturally before I pull another wow classic and waste 40 minutes of my life walking into bum [ __ ] Egypt I asked if he could just try to do it now and to my

Surprise he did share the wrong [ __ ] Quest before telling me to relax so yeah that incompetent [ __ ] was my group’s Mage add that to the fact that my tank flat out would have died trying to solo a mob if I didn’t run into him on my way

To the place and let a hyena nibble my nut sack just to save his ass so let’s just say I had nothing but confidence in my group going into an apparently deadly dungeon the first few pulls were going fine I was not surprisingly winning the dick measuring contest but the tank was

Pulling faster than molasses going uphill on a cold day spewing some riddles about Mano when the healer’s been Jay chilling at full and while I maybe RAV the Avatar Master of the hardcore elements at night my day job boss would give two shits if I said the

Dungeon I started at 10 p.m. the night before was being tanked by a sloth so I took the liberty of pulling patrols you know play a little bit of peak AO behind the wall only to realize she didn’t like this and started telling me what I can

And cannot shoot but no one puts baby in corner and sure enough all the elaborate ways she can get me killed start coming out as threats we then got to a room with big ass piles of cocaine on the floor and I’m thinking bro if only Marvin could see this but the group

Decided that my troll tempers weren’t important and would rather I just wait the 12 minutes for the tank to pull the boss to a spot where I can’t attack so I chose to contribute in my own way we arrive at the Spanish steps where a few friendlies were in prison so we

Politely asked their bodyguard where all his health went and then we released them only to learn that there is an entire Village who aren’t exactly cool with them leaving after a short eternity we euthanized the entire incest ridden extended family and killed their leader but something seemed off the Little

Green Goblin is all like peace I’m Audi and that’s when I remembered Sergeant blly stole from me he said he’d only borrow it but he stole my cherished Divino Matic Rod fly is a backstabbing douchebag and he wasn’t a a fan of being accused of such so I had to play The

Stand still and auto attack for 5 minutes while all 18,000 of his health slowly pisses off until we finally kill him and get back thetic Rod then the final boss is inside and I’ve been patient so we kill him with ease then everyone else finishes getting their Quest items

Except for me and of course these board certified [ __ ] are all like Veil better luck next time with the drops even though they know that I know that there’s 60 piles of cocaine in the other room so I figure if they don’t want to help I will finish the damn Quest

Myself this surely would be deadly to do alone but if I just dig one grave at a time I’ll be fine I thought only to immediately realize that these Mounds are like clown cars and I was capital F [ __ ] I couldn’t run as I knew there

Were paths behind me so I only had one option I decided to take a small vacation to another country to clear my head before I attempt to finish that Quest on my own because a homeboy in the burnt brownie of a Zone Searing Gorge needed my help

Apparently his dad died in some mining incident and it was on me to stick it to the greed bag Executives at the company who weren’t paying out the dead dude’s pension I wanted to tell him bro you have the literal Optimus Prime of dwarfs up the hill go ask him but apparently

That guy was dealing with his own issues you see the climate out here combined with the lack of air pressure makes me fingers expand they’re like gigantic thamar blood sausages they are but we had a devious plan to infiltrate these [ __ ] which started with four Towers

In Flames cut out the eyes and then attack their leaders was music to my Westfall gang slaying ears so I did his errands of attacking the serpent sting vaccinated burnt Hot Pockets so that we could construct a source of fire then he was all like we will need a shaft while

His simp sidekick McConnell was like oh I know where we can get a shaft you can hold Master we decided to construct the shaft like heterosexual men and even though my guide was like hey bro now you just need to use this hole to fall to

Your death in front of 80 mobs I chose to get the shaft ingredients up top which after an hour I concluded to have a drop rate of around 9% finally homeboy vok was like dank now all I need you to do is go [ __ ] on a few people’s religion

They carry symbols and Idols that pay homage to their God then return to me while watch me solve a Rubik’s Cube and McConnell here will teach you how to commit arson he was like bro this [ __ ] is easy no one will have an issue with you walking and looking like you are

About to light the torch at the opening games of the Olympics he was wrong but hey I’m not above murder and with that the first Tower was cooking by the last hour I had a routine down where I would tell Howard to go talk to the guard knowing he won’t be

Able to resist petting that little black board back Mohawk while I set the whole [ __ ] on fire and then together we will make like geese and get the flock out of here I couldn’t wait to go back and tell the boys that the surveillance was cut and

We were primed to kill their leaders and avenge their daddy’s death but homeboy was all like yeah never mind I feel like being a dragon today instead and unless I’m just an idiot I got hard click baited by that now Charizard who originally promised me a gang war but weird unresolved quest lines

Aside I had to finish my own business which was collecting the rest of my troll tempers all because my tank unironically had a temper of his own and while soloing the faric of Zuul might seem dumb RAV the Avatar is the dumbest and so after 30 minutes of clenching my

Ass cheeks so hard together they were starting to cramp with countless close calls and me guiltily gambling a bit too freely with Howard’s well-being I was able to finish that Quest so if my Z group is watching suck my ass sincerely RAV but with that Triumph under my belt

I was ready to take on some supposedly deadly quests the first being in the gaping Chasm which coincidentally was also Russell’s mom’s nickname in college but it was also a Labyrinth of a cave with like 12 species of bug in it and my job was to go into the deepest part of

Its [ __ ] to retrieve some Goblin’s oven that he left in there for some ungodly reason that was no challenge for RAV the Avatar but what I was about to attempt next was just a death clip waiting to happen a congested cave full of Elites and the main bald fatty that I

Needed was in the furthest corner and apparently yielded the ability to turn me and Howard against each other he is rumored to employ mind controlling magic I knew Howard was going to take a beating and I would need to deploy Now You See Me Now you don’t [ __ ] tactics

On the ones of the Mitch Jones variant anytime I pulled more than one my hands would get too sweaty to play properly and I would need to run out I reached the final pack of three with the Mind controller in the back and I knew if I

Didn’t go now respawns would cut off my escape plan if things went poorly the universe was sending me signs to just walk away and with my world Buffs falling off and respawns it would be best to just accept that there are some quests that I can’t solo is what a

[ __ ] would say and Mama RAV didn’t raise no [ __ ] and after running these bald mind controlling diabetics through the strangle forn veale annual half marathon my mission was complete and no Quest was going to prove too hard for RAV the Avatar I quickly realized that with Howard’s Rising Fame I needed to improve

My public image so I joined Mr Beast team C’s initiative you know Adopt A Highway Beach Edition and clean it up so no turtles get stuck deep throating plastic when I had a running with Old Uncle borash a dwarf who combined seaweed with Synthol and now he was

About to get slaughtered I said yip yip to Howard and let him get in the ring for a bit but I’m not trying to have a pork barbecue on my hand so I said okay you can stop acting so threatening I will distract the [ __ ] and we will

Fly this kite and to No Surprise this supposedly deadly Quest was nothing more than a long walk on the beach for yours truly you have slain an enemy but as I was being wbed the environmentalist I found a note in one of the bottles which took me to Planet

Of the Apes Island where an upright cow was being held captive she said King Kong himself had the key and he was slightly bigger than your average ape I asked the experienced members in the guild if this was safe to solo and they all agreed that it was too dangerous but

I had a Plan I would take this plus-size harambe for a few rounds of Ring Around the Rosie and a few short minutes later I channeled my inner Godzilla and probably took a [ __ ] on King Kong turns out the turtles got word that I was trying to save them and one took

Advantage of my publicity stunt by saying hey there’s a side chick out in bum [ __ ] steam Weedle Port can you spend your entire afternoon escorting me there at the speed of a one-legged dog on tranquilizer so that I can get my nut and since Howard’s a sucker for a love story I

Obliged anyways I learned there was once a giant dormant volcano called anoro that’s now a crater and some cther said he knew one of my guildies and told me that they are actually related brother of mine and then he told me what his twitch viewers were doing to help him

Level so fast destroying everything he touched I said yeah I’ve heard of mob tagging but what did the first mob do when M had to fight it himself killed him not far from this spot a local demon worshipper warned me of the dangers in this [ __ ] and I quickly learned what

She was talking about turns out a group of morons got stuck in the crater and couldn’t get out it’s his fault we’re here here I’m making a flying machine I got stranded here and I’m absolutely horrible at finding my way around as I’m thinking well you dumb [ __ ] faces maybe Google

The nearest flight path because you’re practically pissing on one but not my problem as I had other business to attend to this involved celebrating my 51st birthday in a ginger pube of aone and learning that I apparently wasn’t aiming my shots before Emperor RAB now had a

New Groove which also meant that Howard would never be able to hold aggro anymore but anyways my quests were now like okay we need you to make every species of beast in this burnt butthole of a zone go extinct or at least die of old age trying which sounded about as

Pleasant as a sandpaper dildo so I just took a different approach where I attended some auctions and simply bought that [ __ ] which I suppose is why people like this angry Andy think ssf hardcore will be so much better into that I just want to say new series coming in January

But after spending too much of my money so that I didn’t actually have to play the game I could no longer afford a sick bow that’s crossed so I asked for a loan only only to be met with a weird request but I have dignity so the only appropriate response Was somehow I was able to afford the new bow which meant the next hour of my life would be spent chucking rank one stings at obese owls but it would be all worth it when I could line up an aim shot with this new weapon and just watch a [ __ ]

Melt before realizing those were Elites and I [ __ ] up it wasn’t until way later when this new ability was still hitting like a flaccid dick when I realized that the talent only gives me rank one and I would have to talk to sensei in the Forge of irons youve come to the right

Place but it was worth the trip because I got to see how much the Sam Su bulk diet I’ve been feeding Howard had been paying off # pigd and with that I was finally ready to unleash this thing’s power BR but jokes aside I was about to

Put this new weapon an ability combo to the test in a big way remember last episode when I helped this douche launch a damn coup against the mining organization to avenge his dead dad and then when it came time to fight the leaders together he pussied out by

Identifying as a Charizard instead well I found someone else who had a bone to pick with them that bastard Mal torious this little charred dwarf had his recipe for twice baked loaded tater tots potatoes stolen by The [ __ ] bet anything that the recipe was part of the

Deal in his new promotion amongst the dark irons and maybe a avenging a dead dad isn’t enough to pick that fight but when taters are on the table we are committing I’m sure there’s somewhere near maltorius deep inside the slag pit plus there was a bounty for the [ __ ]

Head somi and Howard had work to do we got down to where the leaders hang out and sure enough they were having their water cooler talk right in front of the coveted Bobby fle recipe card two Elites and Mr malus who would turn out to be

Someone I should not have dealt with I learned from Howard’s Uncle Fred and guzu stream that using a pocket nuke to pull a pack lets you split them up later and and since it went so well for him I figured what’s the worst that could happen to my surprise the split pull

Seemed to work as the other two started running back until I touched their butt buddy and classic wow code had them running back to me to the point where they now never deagro and I’m not proud of what I ended up having to Do so I decided to split pull and kill the bottom [ __ ] bodyguards first and this worked like a charm then it was just me and Fir crotch Malfoy and while I thought this would be a walk in the park it turns out this particular Park knows how to polymorph

For 20 seconds as I was forced to watch Howard fight against a boss Elite who I was learning could also bubble himself the plan was now to make like a fart and blow this [ __ ] hole but I didn’t want another Howard homicide on my hand hand so I ran back to heal him

Only to unwillingly become a small lamb again until he was dead and I was in trouble I now had a plan for the PES where I would just play peekaboo when he casted them but even with the evolution of my strategy he was abusing my poor

Pig too hard and I just didn’t have the resources to survive the fight at one point I tried letting him beat up on me for a bit but I quickly learned that one single dot would do half my health and I ended up having to pot when he put a

Second on me I probably should have left but but I had one more plan to use his own polymorph [ __ ] against him out play and after 30 minutes and over 10 attempts of this deadly pull Howard and I slay in front of a cheering section grabbed that [ __ ] head and thanks to

Our commitment the dankest loaded tots would be served on someone’s table tonight but I had to take a break from being a sweat before I died of dehydration so I told Miss tinkle sprinkle piss Goblin that I would accept her triple dog dare to Skinny Dip in a

Hinterlands Pond and get her some good cush from the the bottom in return she said her big step bro would hook me up to which he was like have some of my fabulous nogg and foger elixir after a quick Google search on if this would kill me I deepthroated it only to be

Turned into the sexiest skeleton where I could run ride Rebecca and dance while looking hard as [ __ ] spooky SC needless to say I bought a Costco quantity of those [ __ ] but then word got out of me teabagging Draco malius like a giga Chad SOI pack made an Iron

Forge was all life atino aara has sent out a call for seasoned Hunters such as yourself I meet the deformed penguin who told me he needed deer antlers that would have a drop rate so low I will one day tell my grandkids about it on holidays and then he was like dope now

Ride down to the beach where there will be these endangered three-headed Charizards and I hope to God your Tinder profile wasn’t lying about you liking long walks on the beach because that’s all you will be doing while looking for these spawns but it was all worth because the chain Quest rewards were

Worthy of ejaculation and all I needed to do was slay some Drake and s in a temple that sunk into the ground I knew dungeons at this level are where people get one shot so I needed to find a few serious Gamers to keep me alive I didn’t know what powers or

Dangers the Drakes would bring but by the looks of this group I was betting on us wait are we really going to walk the whole way yes somebody is saying yes he said shut up turns out this dungeon is just like six million circular hallways in a

Maze with big packs where I was Mouse clicking my abilities just to trigger the streamers watching this but all is good because I was Top Dog and the Run was smooth wait wait wait don’t don’t click don’t click the statue we ran into some snake puzzle straight out of Zelda

Where apparently you have to jerk off these statues in a particular order or I’m told you just flat out go back to Elwin this then spawns an angry orange muscle [ __ ] who so kindly gave me a pair of dank cuff Lings then we made it to the main lobby and while my group was trying to deal with The Accidental double pull they just made I was focused on that hole and thinking about where it

Goes red as you you’re just saying it because of this okay like oh you’re [ __ ] some dude who self-identifies as a propit was next and apparently he minded controls but we started the P I walked over to my assigned spot and by the time I started

Warming up my legol list charades act he was already dead his butt buddy gave us a killt and I was starting to think this whole place was an easy joke but they warned me the last dragon is a level 60 killer we get there and they are just

Writing novels about all the [ __ ] Howard has to do if the tank takes a nap blah blah blah the Healer was telling me not to Fain if this level 60 killing Drake targets me but not knowing this fight I decided I would trust his call if it

Came down to that but things didn’t exactly go to plan oh he’s o oh [ __ ] run run run run run run back up back up back up oh [ __ ] whoops did I make it seem like this fight was anything but a piss in the pond because we actually smurfed on this

Shady Drake and even though he did look my way at one point it was when he was already past his Prime Health Wise so yeah we slayed the [ __ ] I rock the biggest damage wiener on the charts here is the loot for anyone who can’t enjoy a

Boss fight without seeing it and it’s safe to say we sunk that Temple anyways I started to feel a bit lonely in this big beautiful world it turns out I had far surpassed the average lifespan of most mouth breathers who play hardcore wow and I was feeling empty without

Someone to share this beautiful highlevel scenery with I craved human interaction and anytime I saw another player I quickly rushed over to them tried to steal their tag like a total [ __ ] and Then followed them around hoping to receive any attention from another player but it turns out they

Were all just Chinese farming bots so when I finally ran into a bdy she was like is that a bone in your pocket or are you happy to see me and I was like a it stitches femur you dumb [ __ ] have you not heard of RAV the Avatar Master

Of the hardcore elements keep your nasty crack bore ribs breath away from me but then I remembered that I do want Howard to have a sexy stepmom with a Dwarven upbringing So I listened to what she had to say I’ve noticed that the water seems to have strange qualities and what I

Took from that was she wanted to go skinny dipping in the hot springs but some douchebag tribe was now [ __ ] blocking me and it won’t let me come near the two larger Springs I SED and said I’ll make sure she can Skinny Dip in peace to which she said well I think

You’ll want to see it for yourself so I ran off pick some feathers to use to tickle her toes you know all dwarfs have that froto baggin’s foot fetish going on then I killed off the village of man bear pigs thinking she’ll be so grateful

That I cleared the area for our nude hot spring date but Howard didn’t [ __ ] tell me I had a booger hanging out so it killed the vibe it reminds me a bit of the sludge I saw when traveling through felwood I also apparently killed the wrong Village of upright pigs and she

Wanted me to genocide the bigger much Dangerous Ones to which I wanted to tell her to pick off but I remembered how hard it was for a guy my height to get any attention from girls and considering anytime they did acknowledge me I wasn’t exactly the best

At flirting so I went to the Village of evolved man bear pigs where every fight felt like a raid boss only to come back to her and be like is that a yellow question mark above your head or are you just happy to see me and let’s just say

I was ready to get this butt naked bath action on but she was all like oh babe one more thing I need you to ride Rebecca all the way into bum [ __ ] cazo to scout out some Zone full of mobs that will easily invert your [ __ ] if they

See you and then I promise ween hot springs and chill but when I finally get back from that weekl long trip she has the godamn nerve to tell me this I’d wait until you are a bit stronger if you I tell this [ __ ] to go on the whatever

Podcast and talk about how her bad breath 4 out of 10 ass with the personality of a literal NPC needs a six-foot man who makes 100 gold per hour in parses like if you’re a broke boy just say so then I shove some steroids in my ass just to show her what she’s

Missing and let Howard know his dad is going to be no one’s [ __ ] thankfully I have some boys who know how to distract me from heartbreak find gesh and chop off his fat head murder baby so I venture over to that tatted twinky eater thinking he’s not even an elite so this

Will be a walk in the park but according to my research that’s not the case for everyone but RAV the Avatar has the tools for every situation char turns out this particular Serta mattress logo was feeling timid so I chose the backup plan which was to deploy a mini

Ice skating rink tell Howard to stay focused on giving that ogre of vasectomy while I make the little butt buddy play the most annoying game of rundown goresh was now looking like niik aado avocado fell asleep son bathing at the beach while I just had to aim one shot to deal

With his butt buddy and while I pride myself on Stellar RP I struggled with this one chop off his fat head so I spored his skull and seeing his Noggin up there reminded me of something dank I had spooky Scary down and sure enough by the end of that I was like donova who anyways I had to venture into the plague lands which I had been warned are quite deadly these Farms had a population density that could only be rivaled by China but I wasn’t having

Issues as I was using new abilities to dehydrate these [ __ ] only to stand and laugh at how utterly useless they are without mana and as I’m looting the coveted tomato soup from the first Farm in front of the food stamps line I’m thinking this game’s too easy but that all

Changed when I hit up my home girl Janice for a little ghostly gu grabbing session as a rebound fling but she’s like I’m on my period and actually I need you to grab my Tampax from the barn next door and I’m thinking for [ __ ] sake okay and not knowing what jealous

X’s will be in their guarding her menstrual kit I sent Howard in expecting one or two but not this I didn’t expect to get rear ended by a blue Skelly but I wasn’t going to let Howard die over just four mobs this spawn was hyper and I had to

Run to the left looked like a Kai Senate meet and greet so I steered clear of that and then I called Howard back knowing if I just left him there I’d get canceled for racism as we scrambled a bit and stay alive but these skeletons will apparently chase you all the way

Back to coldridge Valley if you aren’t careful and that’s when I realized this is when the game gets hard I decided to take it slow when I came back only to hear this I need help so I hurry it up grab her tissue dildos and with that the first Farm was down

Numero 2 was a bit different as some guy was there making the rest of us look bad but his name was sus is all [ __ ] so I had to do some policing that said the mobs were still giving Howard infections to the point where every time I sat down to drink he would

[ __ ] all over me so I was like okay there’s a porta poot around here we will let you get it all out only for me to realize it was occupied with someone moaning in there and I’m thinking what a shitty no pun intended spot for someone to get hit with the emergency Chipotle

Queso shards but at the end of the day Howard needed and so I knocked again only for the dude dropping a deuce to get defensive and Come Out Swinging which is a situation I’ve never been in before but we took care of business so Howard could take care of his and we

Were done with the second Farm 3 featured things that tried to turn me and Howard into dead [ __ ] popsicles but outside of me having to dry hump The Soup pot to be able to click on it that was smoother than a dolphin dick and I was ready for the last this one had

Wailing hores that made me hit for literally less damage than I did well before my balls dropped back at level one and the second I went to slurp those SpaghettiOs everyone and their Undead Uncle wanted to tickle my taint but after a bit of chaos Howard and I

Successfully drank chili from all four farms in the plaguelands then I’m about to let Howard piss all over some Outcast script when I run into two durar douches with Thal dick on their breath and even though I know they don’t speak the same language I let them know how it’s going

To go down as I NAB the tag and prep a kiting split pull only to be reminded that I’m apparently the only toxic [ __ ] that has played too much League of Legends as they clear the Quest for me they tell me jokes I laugh and like a

Foreign hooker that you busted a nut after two pumps we share an inexplicable Bond over a memory we had together without ever being able to Communicate anyways a Time fetish [ __ ] tells me she needs a yearbook from the local town Hall and all I will need to do is clear through the zone that killed one of our Guild’s best speed running Hunters a few weeks back how did what I thought what’s the worst that

Could happen as the first mob I attack turned into four as they apparently were all but [ __ ] each other inside of one of their pixels but luckily they were green Howard was mean and this pole was clean but little did I know of the dangers

Ahead a bony four pack with some of the most deadly mobs in Azeroth who felt strongly against me getting into the school to grab grab that yearbook the first one got flat out erased and I was ready to Amazon Prime me an easy button because this game is a

Cakewalk but then the second healed Howard dropped and all of the sudden I was sweating like a blind lesbian at a fish market uhoh Howard was going down so I planted a face on a stick in the ground knowing if he died I’d be more

Out of luck than the son of a stripper on Father’s Day as I kept kiting back I managed to weave Howard in and out of the fight to keep him alive and all I had to do was keep running but the Temptations to go back in that have

Killed many men before me took over and I greeted thinking I would be fine I fed knowing I was under 10% but I couldn’t see my health and one flaming hot Cheetos queef out of red Randy here and I’d die so I chugged a Kool-Aid and just barely survived what would have

Been a tragedy I wasn’t leaving anything up to chance anymore as I researched which year book was correct and after going full-blown detective I found the one with the [ __ ] stain on it and told chomy I’m not doing another single thing for her entitled time traveling ass but it

Turns out I wasn’t the only Hunter who had a close call that day and others weren’t as lucky what did ay just die this is our best player no no no and I may not know what he needed to kill that mob for or what it does but it

Was going to be my new mission to avenge him it turns out these zombie abusers aren’t just walking around and there’s a series of sweaty sexist steps that a level 60 has to do just to summon one so my plans to get myself and others killed

Would have to wait until later as I had other things to do first like film my music video to promote my new mouse pads this one’s for all the dead homies out there going again let’s get it you just died for the seventh time in Hills sprad you could

Blame M but you know you just need a new mouse pad but the Market’s just filled with trash quality you would vendor so I made my own it’s best for every race class and gender the design is so fine with my very famous swine the material is

Imperial and sick like bacterial my art supports artists none of that AI [ __ ] after all they work the hardest they deserve to get their split now to those who’ve asked how to support me as a streamer the best way is to rub your mouse on Stitch’s femur you’ll never

Need an upgrade cuz this [ __ ] is overpowered and now each and every one of you can slash pet Howard this type of quality will sell fast no doubt it’s a one-time sale so buy one before they’re sold out and for the few remaining League of Legends users I added one

Design for you hard stuck losers RAV out as I got closer to level 60 some events in my past started to come full circle turns out test tting every soup kitchen and the plag lands had me walking around like Goldilocks was my [ __ ] and there was no such thing as a

Pot I wasn’t going to risk my life to drink out of but it turns out these man bear pigs have a social aggro range on par with Taylor Swift so I had to take them out RAV the rapper Style I then had to visit my [ __ ] of an

Internet GF that used me in the past so I gave that ho some of my mystery goo which to No Surprise made her want me as she promised she would change if I did one last thing for her which turned out to be another one of these we’s [ __ ]

Waldo Golden Goose chases through Carmen sand Diego’s Tain escort Quest but unlike my failures in the Basin of aroi I actually found the mail men this time and while I told her some [ __ ] lie about how I took them out for her I actually made a deal with them behind

Her back so that the next time she starts her breakup speech I do think it’s best that we put a stop to it before it gets out of hand her heart will be the one that’s literally broken me haaha until those albino pigs pussied out at the last minute anyways one of

Shrek’s turds with too much makeup on told me her friend showed her a video about two girls and a cup and now she wants to get back at them for not being able to eat ice cream out of a martini glass without dry heaving and while I

Wanted to be like wow nice first world problems [ __ ] I needed the experience so I agreed to let my brain rot in a cave asking these abom able snowmen if they can pretend that pristine horns actually exist in this game I got so bored that I let some dementia written

Papa soda fan account talk my head off to pass the time until six birthdays later I got the lot he said this and I deemed it time to outplay that mechanic I give Shrek’s little bastard her grocery list and she was like dank now prepare for the craziest prank on these

[ __ ] you’ve ever seen and then I quote come back and tell me what happened turns out these reactions were more flaccid than a Viagra addicted dick and while I was thinking this was hardly Payback back for making this Botox toddler watch two girls one cup I am not

One to lie so I told her the reactions were lame but I said it’s okay if she lets her dreams of being a prankster die at least she can blame 80% of that death on Miss kff no anyways my guide was now telling me to abandon my next Quest and

I was about to until I saw who would find out if I quit so for some reason I felt the urge to not abandon it turns out the parental controls on rested XP were just looking out for my well-being as a level 59 boss Elite with two

Patrolling butt buddies is just a death clip marinating and dumb decisions but that basic [ __ ] donova needed to know what she was missing out on inventory is full and it all added up when I looted a damn Love Letter off dead Captain cuck sucks corpse she acting distant with me

All this time was because she was seeing someone his army pulling back from our arrangements to murder her suddenly made sense she was cheating on me and now I’d finally get my closure by telling her good luck sucking a dead man’s dick you little thick Muppet but there Comes A

Time in every man’s life where it’s time to grow up and start acting like an adult so I decided to spend the next 3 hours of my life playing hide and go seek with a bunch of people on a video game and the rules were simple this is

The lowest roll is our first Seeker everyone type it now go for it R I think it’s actually RAV and if you think for a second that RAV the Avatar isn’t also the LeBron James of hide and seek I’ve got news for you wherever you are who is that oh who is

That is that that was pretty oh my God who is it damn the 362 super you’re oh my God yeah I was going to go under there And oh my God that’s [ __ ] Off uh RAV has been seeking for 2 minutes now let’s make a deal Let’s Make a Deal no No yes I found 40 people in under 3 minutes they were so impressed that someone even gave me 50 Gold by the end and just to show how hard this was Annie was taking so long as the Seeker in round to Papa soda had to say this we’re

Going to have to somehow speed this up because we are cutting into the scavenger hunt time at this point but in her defense it’s because I was just as much of a giga chat on the hiding side as I went nuts to butts pixel orgy with My Doppelganger NPC to the point where

Anyone would think us two or one and it’s just typical classic wow code at work but I also had Howard playing mind games with her now wait is that Howard how Howard a boun Howard Howard you’re out dismiss dismiss Howard and when she went inside she clearly didn’t find me

Because all she would see is This well we I mean that’s what the Ser called you’re going to have to tell me where is your owner just sniff in that direction oh this Way oh what he disappeared never real who he’s invisible LSD the entire time 20 minutes later oh [ __ ] powered the boun Howard’s K how Howard’s gone again I was one of only two people left and even though my Howard Mind Games would lead her right to me I was perfectly hidden until this

NPC decided to take his first [ __ ] steps in the history of his existence just to blow my cover uh there’s no way there’s no way no way wait you got to click him I can’t yeah I’m trying who is it something who do you think that has to be oh my God dud

Offing hit boxes oh you had him you had him who was it you got it you got it who was that e grab your crazy that was good damn what a play Howard thank you nice to be a good boy as you were walking up there RAB was like don’t be suspicious Don’t now you’re probably wondering how I got here you see I learned that the original hardcore add-on has a bunch of challenges where you have to defeat certain bosses or quests before certain levels to not just beat hardcore but obtain big dick status and there are apparently only two that stud muffins

Like myself are required to do before 60 the first one I unknowingly accomplished when I killed the polar bear pegging my xgf which left just death clasp the final achievement in hardcore that kills many level 59s trying to achieve such a feet so I was going to do it butt ass

Naked the first step was to take this big bug and his erect tail boner on a walk away from his little honey Hive and those simps then you are probably thinking I just kited him with cheetah all the way to town where I would make some underappreciated City guard do my

Hardcore achievement for me but I’m the Avatar so I chose to naked RP walk instead until those pincers got way too close to my puckered ass cheeks so I tagged Howard in to give me a little space and you’re probably thinking I learned my lesson in will just kill him

Off but who would I be if it weren’t for soloing the most deadly hardcore achievement with my scrotum flailing in the wind RP walking away from a boss that can One-Shot me so I generously let him clear His Bucket List item of making a short n dwarf jump just before passing

Away and with that all the challenges I needed to accomplish before 60 were over and there was only one more thing on my mind pulled another resist my research on avenging this death consisted of me asking a random gear to the tits Hunter how I can make big fire

Boy spawn to which she wrote me an entire PhD dissertation to which I was like hey let’s test run this [ __ ] together but I clearly didn’t know what I was dealing with So after almost getting a another player killed I realized some battles are not meant for RAV the Avatar and ‘s death wasn’t mine to avenge without ay himself by my side so with one kill away from level 60 we sought out to make History oh God this is a [ __ ] uhoh bro [Applause] oh no we got a geomancer in the mix this is exactly what happened to Hunter Dad [Applause] and some may say this was a poetic ending to an Epic Journey and to that I just want to say we’re just getting [Applause] Started Now to understand how this happened I need to take you back to where we left off I hit 60 and despite being showered with the server’s praise I knew that the more important ding level 60 was yet to happen similar to me planning an epic last kill Howard had a poetic plan for

His too to get his final level killing off the ghosts of his relatives haunting their pig family he was adamant on doing the work himself and refused to let me mob tag for him we spent days in those plagu lands until he was just one kill away his ding wasn’t publicly advertised but

I made sure to let him know I was proud and then throw him a party with some of stormwind’s finest baddies that I could find but it was at this time where everyone gathered for our pre- raid Guild meeting because papaa needed to make an important announcement I think

I’m ready to show you guys the roster show you all who is going to be in our first raid it is subject to change um I worked on this last night with ay uh Hunters we only have two hunters in this raid the two Hunters that we do

Have in the raid are going to be dizzy and RAV this meant I had work to do in the form of waking up and checking the mail which was just full of surprises like my long lost father trying to capitalize on my new found Fame by finally coming back from the store years

Later with the milk but it also meant I had to do some honey DS in order to unlock the raid which started with sex elf Robin Hood here who was like dog we got a dragon problem and you probably need to leech off of your guildes to

Kill some Elites to which I thank them by taking the single fight that I beat them in DPS and posting it online to patronize their tiny little damage but on the real sardo as a homie and when I saw that an Egyptian Godzilla breeder [ __ ] stamped his ass a few days later I

Gave him the fattest O7 you’ve ever seen But when I told Robin Hood that we beat level one of Bloon Tower Defense burning steps Edition he said we are going to need backup from Stormwind so I figured I would use my clout to get an appointment with the King himself who

Was all like wo whoa whoo talk to my wife about that [ __ ] who by the way turned out to be a total [ __ ] I was standing right next to you imbecile she was all sus and then said only [ __ ] would investigate further which made me curious so I spent an hour talking to

Just about every breathing creature in the Eastern kingdoms until some drunk told me about some [ __ ] that went down in the mountain we were in the middle of Black Rock Mountain when the filthy animals attacked I grabbed some of the most feared comrades I could find and we

Went in we found the dude that was captured but he was all like yeah I give up this game has sucked the soul out of me and I was like suit yourself until days later I found a note that said the local McDonald’s was bringing back the

McRib and all of the sudden the dude was highly motivated to get out of there we escorted him as he unlocked all his friends but he only seemed to talk to fandy and thank her for the help and I’m thinking hey perver I have a pair of

Tits too and just because no one is paying to see mine doesn’t mean I’m not deep in this Mountain’s [ __ ] saving you too but long story short we rescue him and he tells us to meet him in Stormwind in an hour for what will be some juicy ass drama I decide while I’m

Here to get ATT tuned to some core that’s molten which involved trying to save 15 minutes of time on tunes that we committed 9 days of played time to by trying to glitch our way through Lava and after ing miserably at some practice what you’re going to do is you’re going

To jump right before the uh the Red Bar reaches the green uh vertical bar I figured what’s the worst that could happen anyways it was now time for me to find out the drama that our Prison Break MC rib lover was about to reveal he said

The queen has some Shrek turns into an ogre Dragon at midnight [ __ ] going on and I wasn’t going to be the one to piss on his parade we venture into the keep and even though I personally had my doubts I love to stir the pot so I made

Sure she caught a few Strays from me but to my surprise this conspiracy theory was true as [ __ ] and half of the Guard staff was apparently undercover I ran around trying to spread the word but then I realized that if RAV the Avatar couldn’t save Stormwind no one could my

Ego got in the way of listening to Howard and even though I thought the ritar could help there was one hardcore element I had yet to face death I felt empty inside as my first thought was what would happen to Howard my second thought was how can I

Somehow make money off of this if I’m in mon molten core with you on Saturday you have to buy my mouse pad I’ll buy two and one for Russell it’s where he can put his plates and then my third thought was that I just died 2 days before raid and

The odds of me making it back in time were slim we can power level you go again there’s no time he can’t get power leveled back all the way up there there’s no way it’s not possible I just don’t think that rav’s can hit 60 by the

Time we start a raid just give up unironically the only way it’s possible is either a he takes hard drugs or account shares uh because he has to to play 24 hours a day and then that’s also only getting level 60 I’m kind of down to bet

500 that he won’t do it by raid you also need to get attuned it’s not going to happen but deep down I knew this was all part of my destiny just give up it’s over it is what it is and hundreds of fangle members were going to help me prove them

Wrong so when Soda said this and I need him to tell me what he’s going to do I only had one answer for him In just over a day fangle got me back to level 50 but now my fate would be in the hands of a [ __ ] named P penis from asmongold’s roach Guild who informed me that there was no backup plan for me if things went wrong after being awake for

2 days straight at this point I wasn’t trusting my own ability to avoid death so I was absolutely not prepared for his godamn Roblox obstacle course over mobs just to get to the next step in my Journey and before I could even process what just happened little PP head here was already telling me that one of my guildies died in The Next Step while giving me the most vague explanation of what he did Wrong but with it I had made it to the rock where I would sit for 10 minutes at a time in hopes of getting XP orgasms from him grinding raid mobs and with 12 hours till raid and two levels to go I accepted a bribe from

Papa soda to join back into the only fangs Guild gold that would be used for the final step of the journey and in a 34-hour marathon we had done it and been granted our raid spot back but there were still doubters listen I still don’t think he’s going to make it to

Raid so what’s the point of this [ __ ] think he’s going to make it to raid he’s got to get tuned I just don’t see it happening little did he know that I would be walking by his side an hour later to achieve my Attunement to the molten Corp and while I had successfully

Ascended as RAB the Avatar Howard could not complete the journey with me as he was still loyal to my former dead self I asked his brothers and they informed me that only his ghost existed in the world while he himself remained Tethered to his dead owner and rumor was his ghost

Could be found in the plaguelands my friends in fangle located his ghost and supported me as I tamed him to fight by my side for the remainder of my Journey it was now time to finish my attunements but we weren’t out of the clear yet fck it dummy if you got it kill the other guys in the back here I just I feared them I feared them yeah yeah the Arcana Smiths have to die guys he we

Here we pull behind I Shield this is pretty this is pretty mon guys leave yeah might be a p guys just can can we AE them down yeah I’m healing you still I killed the I I marked a skull kill that everyone I already Petri I got

Scared okay guys do do we all have Petri a few hours after hitting 60 I had to use a [ __ ] potion just to survive the atunement but no matter how little sleep or how deadly the tasks were ahead of me I had a death to avenge and a destiny to fulfill And with that I had overcome the final hardcore element death and it was finally time for what we had all been waiting for time is racing toward us till it is great Time if you learned mechanics we just might survive you’re not ready for the raid molten core so pack up go home you’re through how could I make a raid out of you the first boss was the [ __ ] onyia whose sneaky Stormwind simps killed my first character and even though my heart

Had a beat faster than an EDM concert the instructions were clear step on a crack break your mother’s back and then when purple Charizard takes flight I bust a nut on all my cooldowns after the most intense 7 15 seconds we were in the Final Phase until literally everyone’s surprise we had no

Deaths yet we got it we got it we got it good and that’s it easy life baby we did ites minute EAS sh but when my own performance was subpar I had to channel my inner Wild player to find the Cause It was now time for us to venture into the molten core and for me to use the following footage for my comprehensive guide on how to One-Shot this place the first boss everyone turns their monitors off and jams a one button rotation at one point Howard’s ghost was looking

Like he needed some loving so I spent my fight mending his wounds the second was a large dog who would occasionally get swollen and his Hunters would have to EpiPen him before he bit off a tank’s head boss numero 3 was the first time I saw myself on the damage

Meters for a second before it disappeared and never came back gar was the first boss where people thought we’d have deaths and it’s because every time one of his little sperm cells pieces out everyone around him is all like but we made it through with no deaths the next boss had a mechanic

Where one single person could kill everyone if they didn’t get get out of raid when they were marked Italian guy living bomb Italian guy I’m calling it out Italian guy get out and all I’m saying is thank God no one was apparently listening to soda because his add-on broke and whispered every single

Person and raid that they were the target every time even when they weren’t I then had my few moments in rap to shine want to pull it but I also don’t we’re going to you can thread the needle R you want to try and thread that needle

Pull that cor Hound you you [ __ ] this up oh God oh God okay adamax you’re bubbling adamax you’re bubbling yeah this is you yeah this is me I got it [ __ ] it right we are RAV pull it I believe in the ritar go that’s this right there right in the middle time baby Miz you’re tanking it Miz you’re tanking B booy

Hole bubble B booy hole bubble before we spent 13 minutes talking about the next boss and then a total of 13 seconds killing him holy [ __ ] he’s just melting [ __ ] this just kill him if there’s a mechanic on the next boss it must have called in sick that day because I wasn’t

Even tabbed into the game for this one but then the next lava lamp gone r great boss had a jum for me I would have to get the attention of one of his little slaves and bring them to a tank the only problem was they got a glance of F’s

Tits and for the life of me I couldn’t distract it over no one noticed all right just do damage we now had two bosses left and I felt like things were going a little too smooth so I had a plan ay and I spent the next 15 minutes

Devising an evil plan where I would feain death during the next boss and he would send out a raid warning saying that I had died the whole thing was going to be dank as [ __ ] until my Fain death decided to just not update my frames so we only got a taste of the

Reaction we were going for we’re on moon now the last one and that is it yo threat rev RAV is dead what what oh my God you’re oh what’s a what’s a raid alert I don’t know he [ __ ] died and then there was rag the final boss and the goal from day

One of our Guild and while the others were strategizing and getting ready to minmax their DPS I had my own plan for this Fight I fell the fire we got someone low we got someone real low group five group five back I’m coming back J the bar I got [Applause] You zero death and with that months of hard work sleepless nights and gold spent by fangle and other viewers carrying idiot streamers like myself who barely lifted a finger and we had done it but in the midst of the celebrations deep down I knew there was still one thing I had to

Do and there was only one way I could do it I’d transfer my character so that I could come back to life and call him one last time but I knew what had to be done he was being extra clingy after having not been fed because while I was busy

Fulfilling my destiny he was stuck back Tethered to a dead character who could no longer take care of him I arrived at the spot that I had found him his family around to welcome him back I looked at him and for one last time I slash pet Howard So after what started for me asking to join a guild full of people who had no idea who I was who is this RAV guy is the league RAV guy I don’t who the [ __ ] RAV I experienced the craziest leveling Journey not once but twice I was welcomed by the most incredible

Community I’ve seen online and I got emotional over a pig in a video game and that is the story of RAV the Avatar but what I didn’t realize was that me letting Howard go was what I needed to release his ghost and I immediately knew what this Meant [Applause]

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