I’ve never seen a supernova blow up but if it’s anything like my old Chevy Nova it’ll light up the night sky yeah anyone who misses this will regret it the rest of his life hey fry could you go make some [Applause] popcorn hey which crazy thing happening are you guys screaming About ooh my popcorn’s done a it’s less pop than ever I don’t know what happened but we’ve taken on a lot of clocks let’s get back home such noises oh no there’s no global positioning signal navigation is [Applause] Failing What Is as you can see 1947 is going to be an eventful year for the town of Roswell New Mexico remarkable according to the high Precision digital chronograph it’s July 9th 1947 and the microwave radiation combined with the gravitons and gravioli from the Supernova blasted us through time itself have you seen today’s news
My God this means the Flying Saucer that crashed in Roswell was us and the alien they captured was was our only hope to get back to our own time is to go back through it within oh say exactly 24 hours meanwhile you guys sneak onto the army base and rescue Bender’s body hey
And while we’re on the base I’ll visit my grandfather enus you mustn’t interfere with the past if for example you were to kill your grandfather you would cease to exist but existing is basically all I do Private I want that toilet bowl so clean I could eat off it cuz I intend to well get zuk Sarge that Jeep’s going to hit him and I won’t exist anymore no fr stop interfering with history I don’t want to have to memorize a lot of
New Kings when I get back I had no choice I was about to not exist I could feel myself fading away like Greg caner this place is too dangerous we got to get you out of here everything’s going to be all right Dad well G zukes I
Better ask Sarge no time run run to safety a buffet oh if only I had my wallet with me um it’s free get me the President yo Holmes we’re looking for a microwave oven this oven is lightning fast it takes only 5 hours to cook a roast oh that’s good news you know you really don’t cook enough roasts Leela thank God I got you off that dangerous army base you sure are the helpful type
Stranger say you got anything to eat in that there lunch Box see that waitress there yaza I know what I want for dessert that’s my fiance mild she sure is pretty you ought to marry her and father some children right away fire look out you almost got neutered well Tain as bad as getting killed for me it is
Okay we’re in the middle of nowhere which is the safest part of nowhere safe and sound finally I can continue to Exist what do you folks have today I’ll have a croak mure the paa two mutton pills and a Stein of mead I’ll just have a small injection of femus slim uh two chili dogs coming up well I killed my grandfather wait if you killed your grandfather why do you still exist I
Don’t know maybe God loves me a there there if it makes you feel any better his body was vaporized so there’s no no chance of him coming back as a zombie I’m not worried about That welcome to Roswell President Truman Mr President our experts have reassembled the parts from the alien ship into its original design oh if you come in peace surrender or be destroyed if you here to make war we surrender both good the important thing is I’m meeting new people nurs to this
Space crab if we want information we’ll have to do us an old-fashioned alien autopsy hooray a I know how you feel my grandfather died recently it’s all so sad at times like this I just need someone to hold me I shouldn’t be here I shouldn’t even exist but I do exist
Which proves you can’t really be my grandma relax she can’t be my grandmother I figured it all out of course she’s your grandmother you perverted dope look come back to bed Deary commencing excavation of the subject’s chest cavity and in this corner zberg come on lighten up what is this a
Funeral snap out of it start the ship Leela let’s get the hell out of here already screw History you have both You my great Roosevelt’s Ghost oh all right enus he’s dead sorry took on that causality 1947 can kiss my shiny Metal B there good isn’t you don’t you need this one that’s my gotcha hey wait a Second anything no wait what was it like lying in that hole for a thousand years I was enjoying it until you guys showed up Amen I just saw something incredible cool a big floating ball that lit up with every color in the rainbow plus some new ones that were so beautiful I fell to my knees and cried big deal we all feel like that all the time but you don’t hear us gassing on about it how
Can you people be so Blas why aren’t we out doing everything I ever dreamed of hey you know what might be a hoot no why would I know that let’s take the rest of the morning off and take fry to do everything he ever wanted to do wow the most humdrum activities seem
Almost exciting Through Your Eyes there it is the edge of the universe far out so there’s an infinite number of parallel universes no just the two yeeha bow before your master puny Mortals woo get up W whoop keep your palms flat the tongue tickles I’ve only got two fantasies left
To be invisible in a chocolate factory and to be romantically linked with a celebrity download a celebrity from the internet what part of that do I understand it’s simple you can download a celebrity’s personality and appearance into a blank robot so where’s the celebrity dating Place let’s search the web over
There can I interest you in gwynth ptro nah I read in Newsweek that she drinks human blood and uh how about Cleopatra whose Beauty destroyed Mighty Empires do you have anything with more of a Lucy L feel to it Woohoo I found her what do I do now download her let’s just put a blank robot in the drive it worked you’re one sexy man fill up J Fry I find your slack J stare very attractive fill up J fry did you hear that she likes me well duh she’s programmed to like you and then when I feel so stuffed I can’t eat anymore I just use the restroom and then I can’t eat more you should write a book
Fry you’re cute you’re cute you you you you you oh dear she’s stuck in an infinite Loop and he’s an idiot she doesn’t really love you she can’t she’s just a machine that stay away from our women you’ve got metal fever boy metal fever well so what if I love a [Applause]
Robot ordinary human dating it’s enjoyable and it serves an important Purpose Neato a Maryland mon robot Billy do you want to walk your dog no thanks Mom I’d rather make out with my mon robot Billy do you want to come over tonight we can make out together gee Mavis your house is across the street that’s an awfully long way to go for making
Out let’s take a look at Billy’s Planet a year later where are all the football stars they’re trapped trapped in the soft Vice like grip of robot lips now let’s skip forward 80 years into the future where’s Billy the next day Billy’s planet was destroyed by alien did that make any
Impression on you fry fry oh that fry a sicko po but I tell you dating a robot it’s animacy but fry our friend Bender we’ve got to stem this tital wave of moral Decay it’s time to shut down napster.com your company promotes wrong love if you
Don’t shut down right now the only thing wired about you will be your J you can’t shut us down help I’m being held prisoner who are you don’t hurt us help me they’ve been holding me prisoner for 800 years the real Lucy Lou the one you
Can see a movie of in the popcorn stadium open this door don’t make me call the maintenance guy it’s a bluff we can’t take that chance move people move please pick me up before you go go she asked first oh we’re doomed they got the head they
Uncovered the sign soon the whole world will learn where’re cyber criminals hand me that backup [Applause] disc thanks for rescuing me especially you Bender Bender don’t bend that way Hey look it’s another Lucy L bot I am Lucy Lou give me your spines It’s an army of Lucy L they’re horrible now that’s a wave of Destruction that’s easy on the eyes no don’t open that coffin it’s ticking I have to Alex that coffin’s not going to open itself wait a second is that the head of who I think it’s of read the jar Evelyn
Wood Dr Z fry a herd of Lucy Lou are destroying the city sorry ladies employees only damn it we weren’t counting on them being as smart as they are sexy eror do not confute Lucy lubot if I don’t survive the corn I want you to know that I love you as much as a man can love a computerized image of a gorgeous celebrity which it turns out is a lot what are you doing darling get down light hot oil temperature rising are you
All right yes my love I’ll be just massive corn clog import 7 are you the last copy of me yes erase her fry but I just downloaded her because I love You I’m sorry I’ll always remember you fry and I guess now maybe I can get to know the real Lucy Lou yeah at our wedding it’s true bender and I are in Love Welcome back our next guest has been teaching the world to cook for over 20 years so uh elzar what will you be cooking for Moro to devour with his mighty Jaws hey uh what’s with all the pots and pans you building a Wife Part of one meantime I’m cooking up a tasty Sunday
Brunch for my best friends uh brunch right right I better warn tell warn tell the others ooh nice yes it’s a perfect scale model of the universe’s largest bottle I put a tiny spaceship inside to keep it from being boring Bender is making us brunch boy oh
God my tract he’s so proud of his awful cooking if we don’t eat it he’ll be crushed bleeing somewhere uh with you blocking the only Escape Route don’t be silly in that case brunch is served Surrender Your Mysteries to [Applause] zeidberg today I’ve personalized each of your meals for example Amy you’re cute
So I baked you a pony good thing I secretly installed this wormhole in the table The pie is ready you guys like swarms of things right man I don’t want to hurt Bender’s feelings but this food actually tastes better as [Laughter] vomit And this time I mean It ah who am I kidding it was stupid of me to ever dream of becoming a chef then it’s settled elsar will teach me to cook absolutely not but I watch your sh Joe you owe me bam oh I’ll never recombobulate this ship when the professor finds out he’ll tear me a new
Cloa what up it’s over my dream of being a chef is dead than the cat I’m sitting on in fact why not join us and ride the space rails Get ready we’s going to jump off at that switching prism up ahead we’re going nearly to speed of light so uh roll when you land welcome to bum Bas Alpha the biggest hobo jungle in the Quadrant wait a pie with whole Bobo lifting Aroma who baked it helmet Sparkle he used to be the greatest chef ever yo Sparkle if you’re such a great cook how do you end up in this dump the extreme soda company that sponsored the show decided it was too old-fashioned Sparkle you’re fired
Bam M Su as for me I went temporarily insane and wound up here making pies out of shoes you wish to cook but as a robot you have no sense of taste you don’t understand without the distraction of taste your mind is free to touch the Zen
Of pure flavor you could become the greatest chef ever I could I shall train you but first you must forget everything you know about cooking done that’s right Ricardo a ship in a bottle what’s that oh hang on I’ll look I I’ve gathered you all here in the
Accusing parlor because one of you is a miniature shipwrecker what oh it was a brilliant scheme but you made one fatal mistake leaving this confession note $10 there you go what have I done so must you serve at least one edible meal succeed and I shall reveal to you the age-old secret
Of perfect flavor it is acceptable all Yahoo another thing I’m great at wait why’ you stop eating Master oh it hurts but don’t lose confidence the important thing is that you defeat elar after I am gone and using this you cannot fail There Goes My Life I’ll avenge you
Master elar I’m a walking pile of your unfinished business what you now I’m here to avenge him I challenge you to a battle of the chefs scandalous very well you’re going down um also I had a reservation for one under Dr Bender no robot Chef has ever competed here but today one has barged his way in to challenge for the title of yeah you sure let’s meet today’s celebrity judges captain of the Harlem glows Ethan bubblegum Tate kichi brother and now chairman COI will present the theme in ingredient to be
Used in every dish today soent soent green and classic ingredient of G cooking and the battle is on 30 minutes to go look at Bend to roll that D the iron cook is bringing in his signature creation a working pastry replica of downtown Venice it’s you
Cative turkey Bas is yo hook me up my turkey is dry and I’ve tried everything oh right never mind all the unable Do time up next up Challenger Bender a student of the legendary helmet sparle Bender is some sort of wonderful mechanical man The Challengers must leave to show us that even hideous things can be sweet on the inside who confection will achieve Perfection whose food stuff will be the good Stuff Bend chairman son I came here with one goal to humiliate elar in a large Stadium I believe I’ve done that wait everyone must know I broke the professor’s bottled ship and what is worse I framed my dearest friend fry Here I go already huh and that’s how I defeated elar thanks to Sparkle’s magic liquid let me see that vile Bender good Lord according to the spectralert was Water Ordinary water the important thing is by my standard I want fair and square now who wants brunch cooked with plenty of
Confidence oh yeah oh put down the binoculars fry the wall of that strip club isn’t going to collapse twice in one day I know and I’ve grown to accept that now I’m more interested in that new pizza parlor across the Street I think the owner is from signis 5 sign noids oh all block now let’s go over there and make these hideous strangers feel welcome no you sure about these chairs guy book says human legs bent down at knee Welcome To Earth pizza store here
Sit I bend the KN for you ooh that’s comfy here try a deep dish pizza contains a four kind of things this is awful A don’t cry foreign people I used to work in a pizzeria and as soon as I stop hallucinating and Blasting puke I’m going to teach you to sell pizza Earth Style for starters only use quality ingredients case in point no more live bees human families need a TV while they’re eating so they don’t have to talk to each other ah the earthin Pastime blurs ball I don’t understand this BL ball well if you’re going to be earthicans
We’ll have to teach you how about your Pizzeria plays a game against Planet Express Hit by pitch take your base sorry about that I guess I needed a few more warm-up pitches I didn’t mean to hit you I have some trouble with depth perception yeah me too now please lady I want to live can I use bat to protect head apparently
Not Leela you bean to run in you better let me Pitch but I’ve got a no hitter going excuse me I’d like to talk to you am I under arrest wait you’re the SLE bag who owns the ultimate robot fighting League not anymore now I’m the S bag who
Owns the new New York Met I’d be the first woman ever to play Major League blurs ball well yeah but basically it’ just be a publicity stunt I figure a oneeyed lady skull Buster might bring out the freak Show crowd TDA the first woman ever to play Major
League blurs ball how do I look like a sexy Yogi be can I Pat you on the butt fry I’m a professional athlete so go ahead oh now I’m too [Applause] nervous Skipper we’re losing the crowd put in our new novelty act Leela now pitching for the Mets Tanga Leela
A oneeyed woman this is history in the making folks Boron steps up to the plate and Leela delivers oh buy an in auspicious continuation for the career of the first woman blur [Applause] Boner Kid that was great you got us more publicity than a cowboy in a shark tank Bender how did you get in here as your agent I have access to you at all times since when are you my agent quiet call coming in a big endorsement deal for Leela how
Much as a pitcher I serve up plenty of bean balls so I know good beans when I see them in very short order Leela has become a fan favorite you’re the best babe hang on call coming in what’s that hey you put a one and two zeros in front of out and we
Pass deal so what did you get me a,1 peso cut okay now do one with the bean suit on when I grow up I want to injure Men by throwing stuff at them just like you Leela will you sign my magazine five bucks an autograph 200
Fans I’m not doing this for the wad I’m doing it for all the struggling female athletes who need a role model yeah a role model for how to stink your little freak Show is making it impossible for real female ball players to be taken seriously I hope you’re proud of
Yourself I’m a Fool the the fans haven’t been cheering for me they’ve been cheering at me don’t be upset Leela I can’t let people down anymore I vow to earn the respect of girls and women everywhere I will become the best blurs ball player of all time that’s statistically impossible I solemnly
Swear I will become not the worst blurs ball player of all time ah here we are the worst player in history if I can be just a little better than him I can slink away with my head held high so Hank the bad Hank just how
Blow full were you well I had a low bat in average low it was Zero you Fungo you went your whole career without getting a hit look I don’t want to be in this exhibit that’s why I need your help so I can be one tiny Iota less pathetic than
You okay let’s see what you can do all right low and away you’re holding the bat upside down just piss the ball okay I off the Ball hey you opened the franchise this is great how do you make the crust so fizzy live Hornets we smooshed them right into do look I don’t care if there’s horse manure in it that’s good I want to buy this franchise how does a $100,000 sound well fans Boston’s turning the
Last game of the season into a real squeaker and that’s with three ease two in on and they’re down to their last out come on let’s see some fundamentals out there and not clown fundamentals isn’t there a man on this I’ve been training with Hank Aaron you’ve been training with the Hank Aaron
I’ve been training with a Hank Aaron all right then get in there [Applause] and your attention now pinch hitting for the point Dexter Jackie Anderson Well you look at that keep cool she’s just like any other player she puts on her sports bra one arm at a Time St one remember fans this exciting moment is brought to you by month old Franks the hot dogs with Experience And no question Leela the first woman ever to reach the majors will go down as the single worst player in the history of Blernsball Leela Jackie I guess you were right I’m a lousy role model I’m sorry you absolutely did Leela now please please retire immediately a well at least you’re still the worst football player of all time Planet express delivery company rollon Captain tangala here fired 2 years ago that’s
When we were shut down by the delivery Network yes I’m afraid the brainless drones who run the network cancel our license clear out your desks and move along Chop Chop good news everyone those asinine morons who canceled us were themselves now it’s not hard to spot a
Phony internet come on what’s this I’ve won the Spanish National Lottery no it’s a scam my goodness I’m rich and to think I didn’t even know I had a ticket resolved you’re looking well pops how can you look and the iron and say that Barbados slim what are you doing here is
There something going on between you two I’m sorry Hermes but look at Barbados you can’t argue with those luscious pecs fry will be nice and cozy back in the year 2000 go there a little earlier and wait for him you know what to Do okay fry Come to Papa hey hey there you are oh wait that’s Fred before he goes to the Future o that cheap Beer space pirates space pirates you know Pirates but in space a asked mate’s electronically transfer your space dubloons before I send thee to dve John Locker come on come On I’ll make Bender take a nap in a tube fry to Battle Stations fire torpedo number three that’s not torpedo 3 that’s not torpedo 3 at all damn you frying Le help mechanical Man Overboard go after him Leela it’s no use we were going full speed when we fired him Bender is doomed
To drift through space forever I’m going too fast I’ve got to lose momentum oo hey Universe check out the dude with the roll X ah the pity ah damn you now when I’m found in a million years people will know what the score was hey what’s bombarding me oh no an asteroid
Beat well that was fun now for eon’s a loneliness the hold him that hath taken us unto his breast holy fre holies all bow before the great metal Lord all hail the metal Lord I am the metal Lord who are you I am called Malachi Lord listen here Malachi time
For a religious donation but Lord we are a poor and simple folk what art thou doing Malachi Jun I’m practicing to hug Daddy when he gets back from God gag unto me with a spoon behold the one commandment make it it double can you find him professor no I’m
Afraid the smelloscope isn’t powerful enough fry we brought someone to cheer you up his name is Helper and he’s eager to be your new best friend have a good time hey I heard your friend Bender is back what really no I just thought you would enjoy that for a
Moment oo micro brood my guys did all right I think I’ll make my countenance to shine down upon them did you rip off your own arm as a joke nay like most of your followers I was maimed building the great [Applause] Brewery all my fault Malachi tell thy
People that the Lord is moved by their Plight Malachi junor no this looks like a job for God the people of that Village pray for Wealth the farmers pray for Sunlight I got it I got got it he decided not to let Go so that’s my story father changstein elgamal is there anything religion can do to help me find my friend oh I am your friend bonder bonder is it really you yes yes I am fine give the Gypsy $10 well there is perhaps one way have you heard of the monks of theba
They have built the universe’s most powerful radio telescope high in the Himalayas to search for him my Lord the infidels on your back no longer believe in you they say their prayers go unheeded of course they’re unheeded how am I supposed to hear prayers coming out
Of my ass Malachi every time I interfere I only make things worse you’re best off solving your own problem I’m outfitting an expedition to a monastery high in the Himalayas I’ll need a long sleeve coat look I miss Bender almost half as much as you do but you can’t bring him back
This way it’s hopeless well you obviously won’t listen to reason so I guess I’ll listen to idioticness and come with You atomic bombs oh no those unbelievers from my backside must have found my Nuclear pile the time has come to convert the unbelievers convert them to Radioactive Vapor oh it tickles oh oh they’re dead all dead who would have known playing God could have such terrible consequences behold the monastery of dasua looks rickety we better test It hey that Galaxy signaling in binary oh what are you some kind of Galactic computer are you God possible I do feel compassion for all living things my good Chum a member of our Brotherhood sits at these controls every hour of every day scanning the heavens for God we have not
Yet examined one 10 millionth of the sky but we will go on until we find the almighty even if it takes to the end of time and then what then we utter unto him a short prayer finding God that that’s important yeah but you know it
Might be a treat for everyone if you let me use the telescope to find my lost friend Bender I I don’t know what to say other than absolutely not that telescope is as much mine as anybody’s I’m using it whether you give me permission or not your order may be famous for your
Martial Arts but I’ve never met a holy man I couldn’t CL this is the worst crazy sect I’ve ever been in I’ve met a lot of people pray to you huh yes but there are so many asking so much after a while you just sort of tune it out you know I was
God once you think what I did was wrong right and wrong are just words what matters is what you do yeah I know that’s why I asked if what I did forget when you do things right people won’t be sure you’ve done anything at all hello is anyone out there seen Bender no
It’s been 3 days and even if you stay here the rest of your life there is virtually no chance still I wish I had V Back remember what we talked About B it’s a miracle oh no the monks we forgot to let them out of the laundry room don’t you have to I mean they’re monks I’m sure their guide will let them out or at least give them more shoes do things right be sure you don’t let it express stockholders I
Present our chief executive officer Professor Hubert VOR thank you all for coming now without F ad Express latest fisal it was a year of soaring profits and significant onetime losses F Shalom hunger Shalom free food oh [ __ ] so the you guys don’t believe in robot Jesus believe it was Limitless potential
Boundless Horizon the Unstoppable Jugger of the corporate Universe it’s been a terrible the company is on the verge of bcy this told the W spret what about our thousands of shares of stock worthless I’ll kill you it’s perfect for me you have open back in the 1980s I was the
Toast I was diagnosed terminal btis btis that’s a funny name for a horrible disease naturally I froze myself until a cure was found now here I am ready to SLE my hey buddy from the same time as you remember that song Safety Dance sure do we can
Dance oh but if you want a job I could beg everyone at the company where I work awesome awesome to the max enough talk it’s time for Action I move that we vote on a new chief executive officer and house this old creep I vot my 10,000
Shares for the professor yeah me I nominate that guy not just because he has a suit but because he knows about business and stuff and he has a tie scruffy votes his 40,000 shares for the mysterious stranger 40,000 how come you have four times as much stock as the
Rest of us scruffy believes in this company I may only have one share but I get to vote same as anyone and I’m voting against the cater the new Chief Executive Officer of Planet Express corporation is that guy let’s cut to the chase there are two kinds of people sheep and sharks sharks
Are winners and they don’t look back cuz they don’t have neck necks are for sheep I am proud to be the shepherd of this herd of sharks the first order of business is to blame everything on the guy before me I’ll ruin you like I ruin this company terrific question number
One what was your overall business plan this isn’t a business plan it’s an Escape Plan fry as a fellow 8s dollar jockey I’m making you my new Vice Chairman that’s what I call a hostile makeover he gel no thanks I make my own this company’s going to shoot straight to the top and stay there like Cindy loer seriously though we stink out loud here’s the big enero mom’s friendly delivery company we can’t compete with Mom her company is big now
Are we going to let ourselves get beaten by an old lady and as Vice chairman I believe I speak for the entire board when I issue this challenge to Mom look at my Butt yeah hit him hit him hit him now this is the highight life watching Apes mangle each other near celebrities listen big guy it’s all about appearances that’s why it’s time to update our company stagi image and give it the Sleek dazzling veneer of the 1980s this company’s on the fast track
To the it list image people image scope out this new ad we are all one with one one Pur one hey we were watching that did you approve that awful ad fry yes I did Le and I’ll tell you why because it grows the brand oh Lord what is this moose
Drip the new delivery Kings enjoy our private dining room folks okay let’s work on your execu speak I’m worried about blank um you get back to the farm shift some paradigms revolutionize outside the box try we’re worried about Planet Express don’t you worry about Planet Express let
Me worry about blank that guy is nothing but a flashy con man and you’ve been hypnotized by his swinging balloony that guy’s turning this place into some kind of business this isn’t a business I’ve always thought of it more as a source of cheap labor like a family everyone’s
Fired and we’re out of business no I’m going to sell Planet Express to mom so she can gut the company and eliminate us as competitors I had no idea the company would be sold I was just an innocent suck up you’ve got to believe me just
Leave us alone and let us clear out our lockers yeah I’ve got to redeem myself somehow sometime for some reason I’ll block this takeover [Applause] the Takeover of plan xcorp by Mom’s delivery company will take place in the business center in 10 minutes I am jorl master of scheduling according to regulations
Both companies must approve the Takeover Planet Express shareholders cast your votes and now if Mom Corp shareholders will cast their ballots the Takeover of Planet Express is approved Madam is outraged security I want that bunch of rowdies out of here Mom Corp will now purchase all outstanding shares of Planet Express at
The current market price which is 107 your Shares are worth $107 a piece they are oh my God I’m a millionaire suddenly I have an opinion about the capital gains tax as Vice chairman of Planet Express I’d like to say a few words there Comes A Time for every man who becomes rich
And deserts his friends when he goes back how it was the deal will go ahead as his bone itis I was so busy being an 80s guy I forgot to cure it pry out his fillings feed him to the Jackal and let’s get on with the sale I
Don’t think so because as Vice chairman of the company I gain voting control of his shares I learned that money is fine but in the end what counts is people and so I’m giving up control of the company to a man of enormous experience Professor Hubert Farnsworth stop doing
The right thing you jerk let Mom buy the company we all want to be filthy stinking rich in my whole life this company was the only place I ever really felt at home milliona is nothing the Stock’s only worth three kaj jiggers my ja it’s worth less now than
When it was worthless look so we’re not millionaires at least we all still get to work together shut your fad mouth see you guys Monday good news everyone we’ve got a very special delivery today it’s a little experiment that may well win me the Nobel Prize very impressive back in the 20th century we had no idea there was a university on Mars well in those days Mars was just a dreary uninhabitable
Wasteland over here is Wong Library it has the largest collection of literature in the western Universe hey look there’s a chapter of my old robot fraternity are you here to fumigate the moose head uh no actually I’m an Epsilon from way back all the coolest robots are in this fraternity I’m gearshift chapter
President this is oily and this here is fatbot you’re we all losers my name’s Bender Bender from bending State Bender wow you’re a legend around here anyway I should get going no Bender wait we’re the lamest frat on campus even Hillel has better parties than us you’ve got to
Stay and teach us how to be cool I tell you being here really takes me back to my college days good old Cony Island College go Whitefish please everyone knows 20th century colle colleges were basically expensive daycare centers by current academic standards you’re merely a high school drop Off yo classmate what you taking mathematics of wanton burrito meals I’ll be there please fry I don’t know how to teach I’m a professor see you in class this is going to be great hey oh yeah someone’s been a bad computer get a load of That cheese it Us hey huh pretty nice for a single two desks two chairs couple of beds I call top bunk ah fry I see you’ve met Gunter you know each other Gunter is my experiment he was the top secret contents of this stinking crate gunter’s intelligence actually lies in his electroneum hat
Which harnesses the power of sunspots to produce cognitive radiation you’re wasting your breath Professor he’ll never understand a word of it now shake hands and make up you want a banana I don’t need bananas I prefer banana flavored energy bars made from tofu this is going to be a cakewalk
Welcome to the history of the 20th century be for warned the only sure way to get an A in this class is to have lived in the 20th century Swiss very well what device invented in the 20th century allowed people to view broadcast programs in their own home I believe the
Answer is the Television what I love about being deed of students is the peace and quiet and the respect I receive nice looking model you keep away from it you robots are a disgrace to this University whenever a fire alarm is pulled it’s robot house now if you’ll excuse me I have to get
Back to the one thing that’s kept me sane these past eight years my model ship fatbot no so Chrissy we seem to be hitting it off if you’re not doing anything later might I escort you to a kegger not even if you were the last man on Mars hey you like
Bananas I got her number how do you like them bananas sorry I overslept until 500 p.m. it’s that obnoxious monkey he kept me up all night with his constant thinking I hate that rodent Fry That Monkey is my most important experiment if you two don’t stop fighting I’ll have you both
Neutered that’ll show them ah Mr and Mrs Wong I’m so glad we could admit Amy in exchange for your generous contribution how much more for f Kappa how much you got oh I’m glad you made it Gunter because in honor of parents weekend I have a special surprise for you Mom Dad
What are you doing here what’s that you want to come out no stop hey uh Gunter why don’t you get up on the chandelier with your parents and I’ll take a picture well looks like the part’s winding down robot house what you did to Gunter was
Cruel leave me alone hey what’s going on I thought you didn’t like bananas I try so hard to fit in you’re not like other monkeys you’ve got the hat so what I mean sure it looks cool and it makes me smart but it doesn’t make me happy look
Gunter if you’re so miserable here maybe you should just go back to the Jungle the jungle but I couldn’t do that to the professor I’m a surprise Experiment look at him I’m so Proud Oh poor Gunter I guess he realized I was right when I told him to go back to the Jungle after I spent months slaving over a hot monkey brain you tried to force gter to be a human but he’s an animal now here’s my opinion what we should do is
What I said we’ll go to the jungle and let Gunter decide once and for all I say robot house your watercraft is as ill designed as you yourselves fraternities on your marks hey I see some movement up there I think it’s him stand back there’s our man Professor you’ll offer Gunter the
Hat and Fry you’ll offer him the banana come on Gunter take the Hat no the banana the banana consider the philosophical and metaphysical ramifications of banana banana [Applause] banana Help put on the hat Gunter you’re the only one who can save us you’rea the Hat goes on the head it’s all so obvious now grab on go climb up the vine you can still save yourself there is just no place for me in this world although on the other hand Yeah oh Gunter you’re alive I guess the Hat must have broke my fall it seems to be working at only half capacity but I can fix it all I want out of life is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit that’s why I’ve decided to transfer to a business
School no come on everyone big party in robot House As mayor it is my deeply tedious pleasure to kick off the 83rd or d4th annual ew recycling Festival these old doomsday devices are dangerously unstable I’ll rest easier not knowing where they are so long overly complicated Japanese toilet seems like a good place to ditch some evidence flexo
What are you doing in a hazardous waist bin haven’t you heard us spending units are dangerously outdated scoop Chang new New York Times online podcast blog comments editor Mr Mayor isn’t this e-w dangerous not at all scoop not after it’s hauled off to the third world by an
Expendable team of minimum wage nobody Greetings my friends it Shan take long to strip down your clunker there’s nothing wrong with our clunker py we’re halfway done this thing is 40% chromium what smells like bloody sinuses we burn your eways down to the usable Metals safely releasing the toxins into our air and drinking water let’s play find the
Shiny granted we later learned some positive things about recycling but a better solution is to use our Electronics as long as possible instead of throwing them out in the first place well let’s at least throw this TV out the batteries in the remote are getting
Low no put that back and turn it on I was just trying to help all with a new iPhone from Mom a new iPhone forget this junk well this is a fine how do you do wait I thought we were buying our iPhones online we are
Online but I thought the mom store was across town it is across town I feel like a Mindless zombie I wish I knew how long we’ve been waiting the iPhone has an app for that is there an app for kissing my shiny metal ass several Hello dearies welcome to the mom store the new iPhones are in short supply so please form an orderly okay it’s $500 you have no choice of carrier the battery can’t hold a charge and the reception isn’t very Shut Up And Take My Money say you’re from one of those ethnicities that knows
About technology why is it called an iPhone I’ll explain after I install it neat why here’s a twit now hi Mom I love you more than care but don’t take my word for it unbiased reviews. mom says twitcher is the killer App and now another download episode of The Real Housewives of Sim City check out this webisode of hypnot enjoy your outdated format Grandpa nowadays cool kids like me mash up our own phone ass so what’s happening to me is it puberty it’s a phone call Dingus hey is it safe
To talk while you’re flying oh totally this thing’s handsfree that’s how I can eat this taco and this spaghetti you recorded that the iPhone records everything that reminds me it’s time to tweet my hourly twap date sup followers fry here too much information ow it’s exactly the right amount of
Information for years I’ve collected personal data with oldfashioned methods like spybots and infos skito do you suffer from the Heartbreak of my underarm fungus then you Mr or Mrs N the soothing relief of Mom’s costic anti-fungal bleach This thing always seems to know when I got the munchies greetings followers this is day
Five of my solo kayak Journey around the world send can you believe 50,000 idiots swallow that crap I got the most followers cuz I give the people what they want like this video are you doing karate in your underpants I’ll bet I can get as many followers as you without sinking to your
Level what do you say first one to a million followers wins a buck you’re on S why is Mr chunks doing that because the loser of our bed has to do a double somersault into a tub of alien goat vomit it’s putrid what do you feed him
What comes out one end we feed to the other also Indian food let the contest Begin amazing some dumb bastard is nearly a million other dumb bastards following his every twit you see the plan is about to enter phase two as soon as someone reaches a million followers I’ll use them to transmit the twit worm it’s a very special computer virus for instead of infecting computers it
Infects the human brain I like it ew he sneezed in it oh God I’m going to lose the BET then you’re going to have to sink to Bender’s level stop acting like the queen of England who’s that the Queen of England uh excuse Me I dreed a dream and time gone by I dreamed that God would be forgiving you have a boil on your butt that sings show tunes with you don’t look at me I’m a Freak no no well I’ve been ashamed of Susan as long as I can remember Ew she’s Scottish I Lance her every few months but she always grows Back whoa gross million follower gross fry delete that delete that right Now oh God hey there she goes in a genuine amazing GRE I know I shouldn’t have twitted that but not swimming in barf might ease my conscience how could you do This Poor Mr chunks at least he died doing what he loved impending news everyone we’re about to learn the winner of the BET oh boy oh boy oh boy I hope it’s me Sweet Georgia Brown of Kingston Town it’s a tie since no one lost no one has
To jump all right a tie I win again a tie this worked out better than I could have hoped now I’ll have two million zombies all I can say for sure is now stop getting slapped and power up the twit worm it’s both disgusting and inspiring like Jared from Subway like that giant
Caterpillar what a Jared from Subway now’s us internet G Geeks got a whole new video sensation so my humiliation is over who are you ah shouldn’t you wait for the weather to clear up no I give you the twit worm I’m sick of my head doing things
Leela fry I came to talk to you no I came to talk to you it looked like you were just sitting there but whatever I have nothing to hide anymore oh fry thanks to your selfish rudeness a terrible weight has been lifted from my heart come here what’s stinks were you rolling
Around in New Jersey Leela I knew I could never make it up to you so I did the next best thing you didn’t have to do that I didn’t damn don’t worry by tomorrow no one will remember introducing the allnew iPhone 2.0 dumb bastards we now go live to our Eye in
The Sky hovercopter on the scene of that terrible hovercopter crash the news is so violent let’s watch Rachel Ray instead oh no wait there might be chopping oh God what a wuss stop being such a spineless jellyfish our City’s filthy urine soaked walls have been desecrated by a mysterious tile workk
Graffiti artist police have no leads as to who’s behind this Innovative scourge of public art that is one sexy Bridge Butman free Con well that’ll suit me just F the key is knowing precisely where to strike oops well well time to beat him his rights we’ve been arguing all night K can’t we go to bed is that all you ever think about I’m not just some piece of
Tofu Amy I need to know where we stand in our relationship that’s Bender’s ringtone I recognize his smell hello yo Amy I’m in The Slammer hey Banda you ever kill a man with a sock it ain’t so hard these two brothers bailed your ass out hey hot stuff I’m Larry the murder burglar hi Larry I like your tattoos Amy that man is a criminal I’m just checking out his
Tats I just don’t get why you have to flirt with every bad boy in sight pardon my language but I have had it with you ruffling my petticoats you and I are Through here’s to Amy single lonely and fabulous thanks everybody looks like I’m back in the game tough break Amy are you in K getting divorced no no technically we were Fon Fon ruse so we weren’t really married why did K dump you like a sack of yesterday’s turds he says I have
A thing for bad boys so stupid the truth is often stupid that was great shut up remember love between a human and a robot is taboo we can’t tell anyone not even our co-workers Bender old friend what’s on your face uh blood uh you know shaving
Of the face beard Amy I reckon sweet talk don’t come natural to me but of everyone I’ve ever dated you are probably in the top 10 Ah now then as you all know the county fair is approaching once again so I’m preparing my entry of pickled winds and weathers but no tornado this cattle prod should help help how will that get out there is everybody in position I’m ready for the countdown I’m not hearing anyone
Aboard Mission she said go good work everyone honestly that went better than I expected where’s Amy and Bender that’s Amy’s sweatshirt and that’s Bender’s hat from The Players Ball sweet tornadoes of Barbados Amy and Bender have been Tor to shreds oh a pair of deviant robosexuals not
Under my roof what about on the roof get your mind out of the gutter everything will be okay as long as my parents don’t find out is Aan uhoh not the innocent whistley look we’re your family and if you can’t talk about your problem with us that would be great I don’t have a problem thank you stop seducing him you Hy the path to robot hell is paved with human flesh over the course of this
Escape proof Workshop your software will be reprogrammed through prayer the only lies worth believing are the ones in the Bible can I get an amen I’ll take a thre man H come on Amy pick a male human already what about this gross ugly smelly loser what you doing here I’m
Here to rescue Amy uh from homosexual Desire my parents may be evil but at least they’re stupid this B you were literally Wrestle SP now wait it h h till the S explodes Out I wonder where you are right Now that is That listen up everybody I love a and I’m tired of [ __ ] foot cing around you yes yes I’m just I need I remind you that Romos seexual marriage is illegal not in space Massachusetts we going a effect to legalize it right Here thank you for coming everyone we’re all having some good clean fun here but it’s time to discuss issue the right to marry who or what we want it’s your planetary even ghosted horse but not robot human that’s why we’re introducing this valid initiative to legalize homosexual Marriage a storm is gathering a storm of proo sexual marriage that will rain down on us like fire it’s probably a fire St as a mother said worry me that of Cl I supp this proposition because I lovey Flash and blood woman not surprisingly she loves me I hav heard such an El since Bill explain why he couldn’t pay me back the back when I was full of piss and Viner and my B wasn’t I felt love sweetest girl ever
To I thought our love would last forever but then 43 years later she left me Rob that’s it you hate homosexuals cuz your girlfriend left you robot she didn’t just leave before a robot she was a robot at the risk of losing this debate I beg you to support proposition in Give in a tourament finally we have a leg monogamous marriage like everyone else W yeah Monogamous I was out on the Widow’s walk keeping a hopeless vigil for the return of my first delivery crew it’s been 50 years since they disappeared I had just built my my new shipping and receiving Emporium and I scoured the hardware store parking lot to assemble the finest crew imaginable we’ll deliver that
Package or die trying hey it’s all my favorite patients Zoidberg had hair I never said he had hair if you chose to imagine him that way that’s your business anyway the time came for our first delivery that cookie bouquet isn’t going to deliver itself Go you big metal bird get up there everything was going smoothly until right after that part I was just telling you about suddenly aanda aunt called to say her niece hadn’t received her cookie bouquet just when all hope was lost what happened up there Johnny oh oh
Don’t Make Me Remember sadly my Brave crew was gone forever what do you think happened Professor they were lost in the Bermuda tetrahedron because for your next mission you’ll be flying directly through the Bermuda tetrahedron you’ll be picking up a monument commemorating my lost crew to be unveiled Tuesday at their memorial
Ceremony All The Grieving families will be there here you go in memory of the first planet Express Ship and its crew hang on it’s shouldn’t have an apostrophe this means and it is crew I insist you recar the entire statue correctly okay okay well the statue’s perfect now too
Bad we won’t make it back in time for the memorial service we’ll make it or die trying oh I think I’m remembering that thing I Forgot it’s a spaceship graveyard over there it’s the original Planet Express Ship what caused all that damage whatever happened here that first crew left in a hurry the table is still set for McDonald’s value dinner oh no something’s happening what’s happening all right and there was a giant killer space
Whale Space Walk people Space Walk for your lives man look at him go like a Millionaire on a cocktail Wiener Panic jerks that’s no ordinary space whale it’s a four-dimensional space whale raise the solar sails I’m going after that mobious dick you’ve been hitting a red stripe woman comport yourself Mr Conrad Leela I’m no doctor but I’m afraid you be exhibiting symptoms of illen you’re risking all our lives for your own
Personal obsession there’s nothing personal about This maybe if I move the compass like this it will somehow kill the whale Leela we need to talk you’ve gone from crazy like a fox to crazy like Fox News let’s kill the captain and order some strippers yeah what he said it’s a mutiny led by fr that’s enough
Insubordination Mr Fry string them up things look bad enough without having to look closer at them all right which of you space dogs has the guts and knowhow to Harpoon that whale I spent a semester in Africa harpooning giraffes oh God I’m having a serengetti flashback die you dirty giraffe We have to cut the rope negative Sailor Moon we’re going for a sleigh ride oh yeah Bend Bend Bender Bender Bend Bend Bender Bend B Bender Bender B it’s pulling us through a field of space bgs Come to Papa a lot of Bender fell out of the
Crow’s Nest we need to cut the line enough of your mad obsession with Bender fry we’ve got to murder that whale or die trying oh so Close hi you’re all too weak I can see that now so I’ll have to be my own crew understood you do know I’m stabbing at thee Right think Zoidberg you must remember something no nothing for all I know our friends could have been eaten by some kind of crazy space whale oh zberg The Grieving relatives will be gathered here tomorrow in need of comfort and with no stone monument they may well demand that
I refund their admission fees like that Bible guy who got swallowed by the whale Pinocchio this is all obsessy Bessie’s fault right on sister we should be back at Planet Express right now hiding from work in the ceiling holy crap for four dimensional bowels Einstein was
Right what and how the great fish has chosen you for a higher purpose I was once Lando Tucker captain of the first planet Express Ship you see this space whale feeds on Obsession oh what are these things get away the whales nearly suck me dry it’ll
Need a new source of obsession once I’m gone all I wanted was to complete eat my delivery is that too much to ask one chicken picking delivery this whale’s going to pay it can’t escape what it already is Me poor Amy my days of joy and luck are over guess I got to quit that club I can’t believe ala is gone I had intended to unveil a beautiful stone Memorial today but due to the recent tragedy I humbly ask you to join me in a simple Prayer good lord it’s some kind of interdimensional space whale I just remembered that’s the Guy Lea you’re alive is that how you and your friends are dressing now hello everyone I suppose you’re wondering why my flesh has melded with that of a giant space whale you see beneath my obsession lay an even deeper Obsession an obsession so strong it allowed me to
Overpower the beast’s will and pilot it through space and time poor Lando this is just how I want to remember him too bad cuz he’s still alive told you I’d be Back they haven’t aged today I should have listened to my crew that space whale wasn’t a monster it was the obsession of me and others like me that made it into a monster mainly you so Johnny are we going to pick up where we left Off run Leela they’re bouncing right at us anybody hungry I could stuff myself I’ll use that free app that tells you what restaurants you’re near you mean the window yes I demand extra dipping sauce how many oh two welcome to fishy Joe’s yeah give me the right spaghetti dinner breakfast
Pocket for lunch and uh big bucket of mixed sodas one kids meal got it huh bugalo tots what kind of cheese filling you on that oh God fruit is spelled f r o o t oh I got a bone in my fruit that’s it from now on we’re not eating anything
Unless we know what it is and where it’s from we’re going to to the local farmers Market you think that’s healthy try this I found it growing at the bottom of my hamper M so fresh and musty Zub tobacco the richest most obnoxious kind smoke one of these and guard himself will ask to be City far away from you oo heirloom eggs that’s so life
Affirming but are they way more expensive than regular eggs way more ooh you’re not my breakfast friends what are you doing here Leela blackmailed us all into eating healthy organic food fertile what does that mean it means it’ll hatch into a tiny little infant creature unless we cook it first hey
Leela hurry up with those scrambled infants oh no you won’t I refuse to eat an unborn animal I’m going to keep this egg safe and warm and secure until it hatches out into the world Bender do you mind I’m roosting I’m considering buying a yacht to house
My Dura breads how do you expect me to do that without smoking a cigar Leto mygo krabo stop it fry that’s sexual harassment yeah come down round off your round white Pulpit a chance to blossom into a beautiful young man like I did as a baby and all yours
Zoidberg a look at the cute little relax you babies it’s no different from stomping a puppy everyone stop he’s not going to hurt you I know he’s ugly and kind of corrosive but we can’t murder someone just cuz he’s hideous and annoying that’s what we said about Zoidberg and
Look where that got us Amy has a P hey what you doing little buddy ah yeah Uncle Bender he’s your friend come on boy get the ball dumb Jerk come on get the ball how big does one of those things get well that depends on what one of those things is that seems like a fact worth
Knowing just as I feared attack type J hence the Latin name bonus vampirus or as you non Catholics would say the bone vampire de at least there’s only one of them the good news is they can’t start breeding the bad news everyone is the Beast reproduces asexually that lucky bastard
I say kill it but it loves me and I love it kill them both killing them seems like a hassle we can reintroduce it to the Wild and repop populate the species yeah let’s do those Leela Things I’ll miss you Mr Peppe go on now I mean it don’t make this any harder than it has to be it’s time to let Go come on Fry let’s go home and hold up there’s alcohol around here somewhere my tank radar is going [Applause] [Applause] Crazy excuse me but we’re guests on your planet speak English may I buy you a drink we don’t get a lot of pretty faces around here thanks I suppose I should know your name if I’m going to be drinking 10 gallons of alcohol with you maango Ang mango I’m tangala my crew and I are from
Earth so what brings you folks here to do in six we just released an endangered animal back into the wild a bone vampire you brought back the bone vampire the damn things wak bloody havoc on our livestock for centuries we going I have no murdering bone vampires back
Here kill it a for it puts it bone in its own oven and repopulates a beding planet please Mr Peppe won’t attack you livestock Angus wait my strictly platonic friend is right at least wait a few days before you decide to kill it the Beast lives for now thank you
Angus I don’t trust that [ __ ] maybe I should go keep an eye on Mr peepe don’t worry about mango he and I are having brunch tomorrow I’m thinking of wearing this what is this was no accident still think your Mr peepe is harmless fry he wouldn’t do
This in our sleep he would not could not to a sheep what are we supposed to do just sit here and wait for Mr Peppe to be killed sounds like a plan okay that’s it I need some air [Applause] a Mr Peppe attacked me quick count my bones there should be 205 I’m sorry fry but no vegetarian could have done this I know and as much as I love Mr Peppe I love Leela more he has to be put down if anyone’s going to kill Mr peepe it should be me
Fry I know you’re upset right now but I hope you’ll consider donating the body to science dinner we’ve been walking for hours I hope we can find our way back don’t worry I left a trail of breadcrumbs and I left a trail of cigars there it Is well this is it you guys wait here this is going to kill him more than it does me W oh what’s happening did you kill it the bloody idiot bloody shot me I’m all bloody bloody jankies he Scooby-Do us why major [ __ ] why oh it’s been 30
Years since last I killed a bone vampire the villagers didn’t idolize me like they used to but why did you attack me so I could impress you by seeking revenge on the creature as greeters don’t get a lot of action on paper it seemed like a win-win situation hey what’s that bone sucking
Sound it’s Mr peppy I’d know him anywhere why Mr peppy why W that tickles now I really do have to kill you don’t [ __ ] the cursed thing even deome which is perfect for today’s fast pissed lazy consumer d rushon the Beast must leave one bucket of double fried triple
Salted boneless sheep tots please what kind of cheese fing you wanted that all kinds H Mega two push Mrs fry you’re almost there it’s a boy and look at that red hair you saying my son’s a k and groy leans into the pitch it hits him the Mets
Win look yansy it’s your baby brother Phillip I want to be named Phillip me Phillip me Phillip son your name is yansy Phillip until I find a suitable model of an ICBM you’ll have to make do learning to fear this toy Spacecraft and it’s a dead heat they’re checking the electron microscope and the winner is number three in a quantum finish in today’s field we own four horses and two jockeys we just put our best jockey out to stud Amy he’s perfect for you hey baby oo look it’s the Centaur
Race and the winner is number four Steven oh I am so unlucky I’ve run over black cats that were luckier than Me hey what are you doing this come on number six move it and the winner is Harry Water by the entire Racetrack and I say enough I’ve got $1 left and this one I’m holding on to oh no you don’t I may not know much about horses
But I know a lot about doing anything for $1 Kareem’s got the sky hook but Philip J Fry’s got the space Hook holy camole a sevenleaf Clover well someone’s in a good mode let’s just say I lucked out at the track also I rigged One race your new hair is ready so whatever happened to this seven leaf clover I hid it in a secret hiding place whose location I never told anyone
Underground in the ruins of old New York helping some ant to feed another ant or helping some piece of dirt turn its luck around dirt doesn’t need luck I’m going down there to get my Clover back here’s the entrance From This Moment On I declare my bad luck officially
Over look up ahead oh old New York the city that inspired a casino in Las Vegas wow we’ve got Manhattan all to ourselves ah oops New York is so Burned as you know the big break dance battle is Saturday name Cosmic F style Outer Space special moves the moonwalk special moves The Space Walk hey the robot the robot that’s similar to mine why do you always have to steal everything from me yansy find your own life and live it stop
Illing word well I’d like to see you try to steal this the seple head Spin crazy sucker stop hogging the Clover let’s go find that Clover which way to your house the sign says we’re at 71st Street 71st Street hm never heard of it downtown could be in any direction this is the Brooklyn bound be train making local stop sh wherever the hell I feel like watch for the closing doors bo bo
Gosh my old neighborhood oh that’s the bench where I found some shirts that fire hydrant in the summer we’d light on fire this place is a lot different from La holy camoi the house I grew up in it’s still there man father time really took a bat to this place
Help yes Mom Yan’s trying to steal my Clover yansy stealing is wrong well he better keep his hands off these bananas going to need them when the radiation turns us all into monkeys the Ronco record Vault stay safe Clover I may need you again Someday my Ronco record Vault I still remember the combination three it’s stuck there we go here it is here goes it’s gone the whole place has been cleaned out yany stole my Clover that Thief I don’t know why my brother hated me so much who is that Godlike figure and
There in his lapel my seven leaf clover I knew he stole it hold the phone if that’s yansy why does the inscription say Philip J fraud this Cadillac of men was the first person on Mars I should have been the first person on Mars so you opened the record Vault and
The Clover was gone yep nothing in there but all the best music of the 1980s in one amazing collection first person on Mars oh so your brother was D Philip J fry I’m Philip J fry he stole my name after I got frozen Philip J fry astronaut philanthropist entrepreneur was a great
Man truly worthy of narration that’s my Clover yansy stole it today fry spends most of his time in his grave at orbiting Meadows National Cemetery buried with the trademark seven leaf clover that will bring him luck in the next life Leela Bender we’re going grave robbing I’ll get my
Kid I just wish your brother was still around to see this oh I miss him o that reminds me I was thinking I’d rummage through Phil’s records for something to play at the Wedding Now no one will be able to say I don’t own John larette’s spine aha my brother’s grave it’s clovery time so had any ideas for names yansy Daddy has a present for you today do you know what it is it’s a lucky clover that can help you be successful whatever you do
Son I’m naming You Phillip J fry in honor of my little brother who I miss every day I Love You Phillip here lies Philip J fry named for his uncle to carry on his Spirit hey fry you want me to smack the corpse up a Little Fry I know those cookies are fresh elicious but they produce an awful lot of trash ah and Bender that aerosol heads spray makes your antenna smell nice thank you but it’s doing long-term damage to the planet for this highly controversial Mission you’ll be Towing the Juan valz and orbiting super tanker
Full of Rich Colombian dark matter why do we have to fly within 3 ft of this penguin preserve on Pluto to avoid the toll booth I can’t participate in this mission in fact I’m going to go join those protesters this is an outrage well fry or should I say because
Bender is the new captain no fair Leela was training me to be Captain she even let me sit in her lap and steer in this comic I drew ooh the new one’s out now look spry Men We launch it six bells Now folks it’s time to stop that tanker with a nonviolent human Circle can’t we just kick their asses now little lady those people’s asses are living things too Ed E men I am Ed E Mr Fry I like to give my first mid an informal nickname
From now on you’ll be known as Wiggles you’ve just earned an invitation to the captain St table the Captain’s Table what an Honor when you were planning this peace ring didn’t you realize spaceships can move in three dimensions no I did not folks that tanker gave us the slip but we’ll stop them here on Pluto this here is our penguin preserve aw they’re so cute they’re like if puppies and kittens could have
Babies but I suppose it’s this metal I’m most proud of Wiggles I want it for saving the children of Earth from a giant kangaroo thank you Steward Wiggles weren’t you about to propose a toast to your Gallant Captain fine I’ve got a toast to Captain Bender you’re nothing but a big blow
Hard sir you forget yourself sh I’m going going but a captain can’t drink without his first mate oh green land is a baron land bear no Bree here they come oh I hope they read my sign Continuing our coverage of a tragic but far away Story the crisis on Pluto worsens as dark matter spreads throughout the penguin habitat the images are truly horrific at the time of the crash the tanker Captain had an alcohol level of 8% well below the legal limit for robots
Five hours of community service cleaning up that old mess you caused 5 hours oh man couldn’t you just got me the death Penalty good way to avoid frostbite folks put your hands between your butth Hawks that’s Nature’s pocket uh I think I’ll go check on Bender Bender can you at least pretend you’re being punished and clean the black Parts too yo screws more tman over here oh what’s This oh man he got away I guess this is why Chief says no Hugging has anyone seen Bender Bender here robot robot robot so where’s Captain Bender off catastrophizing some other planet damit fry he may have done wrong but he’s still your captain I’m worried about him to the ship why don’t you just walk he was only about 20 yards from here
Madam I am in command Now Captain I don’t think we’re on Pluto any longer in fact we may have left space as We Know then where are we you said you knew how to navigate stop yelling at [Applause] Me [Applause] dog matter is Nature’s sex Dr like a perverted Trail penguin estrogen pag and Spanish penguin P also the egg hat only 12 also the males a may this man is over only we had oil this fight can’t we stop from I officially Open I un to love this time the two are one of the same now are you or you going to leteng [Applause] suffer nobody enjoys shooting penguins your hand you well you [Applause] Got it’s been an hon to serve to you sir got to kill entire [Applause] family you’re so cute oh no what have I done better What are you doing get away a I love you well I don’t love [Applause] Them want to help not this way I don’t The okay boys it’s right No I suppose this was your doing yep it’s like gu caught black and white scratch and bite take off My only had a f F all right take can swim all coming back now [Applause] Well at least it’ll help reduce their population can’t take off without our C and we like To [Applause] A Now we all love Nibbler so it’s only fair that we all pitch in and clean it up together still I propose we make Zoid buug do it all in favor yep all opposed he always seem so full of life laughing singing begging for scraps and now
This why with all the crying ah the fresh air feels good stop doing that hey that’s my cell phone hello yeah what’s wrong did you swallow your phone again some guy’s been calling and hanging up 10 times a day for a year hello hello is anyone there I love
You why must I be such a coward GIF I’m headed to the men’s room and I’ll be needing an attendant so oh I’m sorry let’s wrap well I’m in love with this girl when we were escaping from that cruise ship you piloted directly into a black hole yes it was in all the Papers mhm uhhuh I’ve finished talking sir belay that remark your Amy knows my Leela I have formed an idea I’m calling to negotiate a double date please Leela Kip’s like the sweetest guy who’s ever liked me five and that’s my final offer four one two one half I’ll take
It um sir I don’t go out on many dates and um what if I can’t think of anything to say here’s my personal book of pickup lines hello beautiful I got these for you thanks waiter bring us a bottle of wine half bottle and some oysters on the half
Shell quarter shell oh and I’d like ke’s not hungry ke this place is expensive kef you’re so quiet you haven’t said a word all night well um Amy if I you had a beautiful body would you take your pants off and dance around a little what this half date is
Entirely over Amy conference there’s only one sure fire away back into a woman’s heart and parts Beyond I speak of course of karoke once upon a time I was falling in love amate your hour is over let me show you why they call me the vour fog hit it c o l a
Le e l a Le we’re going home let’s see what this eery can Do look what arrived my new shell catalog so let’s try some on already this one’s like a summer guy I can’t believe Leela and Amy aren’t back yet from their half date I’m going to call a restaurant the number you have dialed has crashed into a planet please make a note of It what planet is this anyway this whole sector is Uncharted it is not not Uncharted you lost the chart well nothing to do now but repopulate the human Race well hello I usually don’t say this but you are the most beautiful Trio of gigantic ladies I’ve ever laid eyes on oh no any sign of Leela or Amy no but what do you make of this I don’t know but it might have something to do with this all right here’s the
Plan what kind of moronic plan is that wow this Capital City Planet Amazonia where are all the men in your Society men die out many year ago with all these women around they probably be nagged to death this our Comedy Club humor here funny in different way it not reinforce
Stereotypes this women only planet is sounding better and better I’m already looking for apartments here live vengeful all knowing Leader all hail futer futer we bring offering of bath beads and scented soaps your gift pleases futter futter demands to know why there are men on her Planet Leela I’m through making fun of women now I want them to help me should we do something men strange you have them on
Your planet I’m afraid so what they for those Oh you mean Sno SN just FYI I could be used for snoo snoo silence after lengthy amputations I futer have decided the fate of the men futer sentences them to death death to the men death by snn but
Most of these men are sort of my friends they don’t deserve to die H perhaps men are not as evil as futer thinks but they make fun women’s basketball Kill Them All I say and good riddens did I mention I’m not a man I’m a man bot that’s
Understandable mistake you can let me down now Thanks I’ll miss you meatbag me too meatbag he that is designated fry will be snoo sned by the petite women then the petite women before I die I have to tell you I didn’t mean to say those awful things on our date they were all
Zap’s idea really I love you oh K it th’s first time Bender maybe you can interface with the futer and reprogram it to let them go yeah oh baby yeah Intruder stay away from the mighty futer Gods cease hitting futer oh you’re no futer you’re a fem bot it’s true I came
Here from a far away planet a planet ruled by a chauvinistic Manor that was really a manbot there’s the question of what to do with you we need rest the spirit is willing but the flesh is spongy and bruised it time SN snow can’t we just cuddle no ow me S out me
Way K jump my hero me not get snoo SN we kill her now come back later leave me alone yeah get lost you heard the man come on give me some of that it’s funny how the Battle of the Sexes was only resolved when a manbot and a fbot realized they loved each
Other Yeah by by the way if she calls I’m not here so um Amy what do you want to do now okay all systems operational let’s rock I’ve completed my report on the crash whoa I’m not reading that crap summarize it in one word sabotage is the L unit I just removed
From the ship this is 340 lb of Tonka tough steel it should look like this but instead it looks like this I better make a chart of the suspects I’ll begin by drawing a line with my straight edge sweet Lampe of Santa my Edge has been bent what’s all the
Hubub my God even the professor’s been bent I’ll get you fixed up oh oh that’s fine ah last night’s T see nothing told you losers wait they’re on the screen it’s that guy you are I’m sleep Walking you weren’t sleepwalking you were sleep bending this is quite a shock on the other hand it’s not surprising in the least after all I’ve been bending since the day I was Built you remember your own birth sure it was only four years ago you’re only 4 years old precocious little Scamp ain’t I go satisfyed your Bend lust and don’t you come back to work until you do no more bending no more work as the duly elected mobsters of this Union it’s
Our duty to support the struggle of these proud lazy slobs ah no a strike management refused our demand to switch Casual Friday to Monday what and now they’re hiring scabs at 10 times a normal way welcome zard scab great to be here come on I’ll introduce this you to your SK co-workers
You’ll be scabbing with this is a scab Foreman blackx out bender and here’s another scab what also works here angelene Hello kill us you big F JK ow so um uh I was wondering if you know it’s cool if not but what are you doing after work what I always do Jack squat maybe I should sneak a peek at your access panel according to the scab handbook that’s extremely inappropriate banter and that’s just the way I like
It what an Exquisite day that Azure Sky The Verdant Treetops perhaps Seeing Things From A New Perspective has reminded me of life’s Beauty Union forever lousy scar they can’t do those things Etc here let me help You my new bent Outlook has completely re-energized me I’m even dating a young bra Brazilian retired actress hey look at this crowd you guys got to try the pasta it’s got a real nice profit margin so Bender tell us about this new girlfriend of yours I
Intend to through the Lost start of the toast to angelene she’s got it all Leo careful that’s a week old it’s time to kick some shiny metal ass you degenerate hussy I’m disappointed in you too angelene vinder it’s it’s not what you think we’re just having dinner cuz we want to stay
Friends I knew that that FX over I’m knocking him right on his butt keep my obsessing won’t help Bender take a lean back and enjoy life okay I’ve constructed an elaborate lie I’ll call angelene while pretending to be flexo arrange a date show up disguised as him and catch her two
Timeing me with Myself now we’ll see who loves whom hey hot stuff hey flexo so since when do you go to bars on work nights it’s not like like you at all nonsense it’s exactly like me two fuzzy navels coming up I hope they can make change for a
Fortune you get an eyo of that filthy scab with the beard flashing his filthy scab money you’re looking good def flexo tonight quit making with the googly eyes and you know that I’m in love with Bender but going through a divorce together you can’t tell me that didn’t
Bring us closer can’t a dance well you know I love dancing but you always hated it hey scratch Mo how about dropping me and the L some rump rattling Beat come on now what you do flexo what what’s going on you make me feel like a million volts oh flexo Flex so flexo I’m starting to remember why I fell for you in the first place I should get home to my trailer I’ll walk you out after all a true
Gentleman tends to his dates every need tiparillo that scab’s going to have a little on the job accident good night I had a great time how about a lift to your place what admit it you felt something for me tonight but huh Bender you tricked me well maybe I
Love you so much I love you no matter who you’re pretending to be oh how I wish I could believe or understand that there’s only one reasonable course of action Now kill flexo thanks I appreciate that n I’m joshing you that was quite annoying all right boss give the W and
I’ll drop this unbendable gerer clamp clamp Kamp remember only kill the one with the beard that’s low please stop I’m not worth it probably not but I love you No oh that’s got a clamp Leo are are you okay tonight Bender showed me that I love you but but I love you so much angelene I want you to be happy no matter What thanks buddy jerk so flexo and angalene had sex right there on the factory floor well at least you got bending out of your Syst fore foreign Go for for hand J Oh Spee spee
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