Welcome to the resilience unlimited show your go-to podcast for empowerment and growth I’m coach Dr Lauren founder of resilience unlimited inviting you to join our transformative Journey each week this space is specially crafted for high achieving women specifically women of color where we can feel seen heard
And part of a thriving Community this podcast is your compass for emotional regulation understanding your purpose and living unapologetically authentic ready to invest in yourself all right we are back this is another fantastic episode with another guest so this is just such an exciting space to be in I love meeting new people
New women resilience I mean this is just I’m excited to be here so if you are new tuning in to the resilience unlimit limited show I am Dr Lauren as you heard in the intro and um I drop episodes every Tuesday at 5:00 a.m. eastern and I
Just love being able to have this authentic space for women of color where we can really just Thrive and shine and just show our true colors and passion so um those of you that have been tuning in you know that I like the structure of a question and then a conversation so I
Have a guest today and so excited because she is a TED Talk guest too and you have to see her Ted talk but we’ll talk about that later and her name is Rashida Williams and I am just so so excited to hear all about the resilience
And mentoring and all of the things that Encompass your business so Rashida welcome to the show thank you so much for having me it is so great to connect with you I am truly honored to be a part of this podcast and the amazing work that you’re doing to help uplift and
Support our community yes and you as well I mean your your work I’m so excited to delve into it and before we kick off you kind of telling a little bit about yourself I do want to let you all know if you were listening to this
You can also pop on the YouTube uh channel so you can see us having a conversation you can get a sense of what we look like all of that good stuff so rashita why don’t you open up the conversation and let us know a little bit about you and why you’re here sure
Thank you for the opportunity so I’m rashita kamaria Williams and I’m the chief empowering officer for empowered flower girl I like to tell people that I’m a mentor turned social entrepreneur but I’ll always be a mentor uh because that’s that’s just what I do yeah but Empower flower girl is a social
Enterprise that I started after years of mentoring youth in particular girls and young women I had mentored I would say probably about um five to about five or six young people before I launched Empower flower girl so yeah it was really a journey of me going from
Working with youth uh in a one-on-one capacity to realizing that there are so many young people in our communities who need help and guidance and support and what can I do to formalize things and make sure that more young people have access to this type of support so I
Found an empowered flower girl and and we work to help young people live above life’s drama from cyber bullying to societal pressure so ultimately they can make a powerful difference in the world yes and when you were talking about cyber bullying I was thinking about your Ted Talk and it was just for
Me personally you opened and shed light on things I never thought of and so I think that’s why this is such an empowering and important conversation so I am going to lead with our our big opening question and I’m going to read it because it’s very detail but I feel
Like it’s it’s meaty so yeah how would you advise youth Advocates and mentors working to instill resilience in the young people they support particularly amid societal challenges and how do you foresee resilience remaining a central focus in your future plans and initiatives for empowered flower girl wow when I think about that question
Yeah like you said it’s it’s meaty and it is and I love talking about let’s break it down let break it down over the past few years what I’ve been laser focused on is really inspiring intergenerational empathy and understanding okay and to me that is the key yeah when we look at
How things have been going in our society right there’s been a lot of challenges that not only face uh young people but adults as well and all of us are facing This Together from of course we had covid right we had a international uh pandemic you know no
Matter where you were in the world you were impacted by covid and and our young people really really experienced that in different ways that adults didn’t right many of their many of their Milestones that we got to experience you know they didn’t get to experience prom or homecoming or graduation yeah we did
Right so they’re experiencing this they have fears as well they’re losing parents they’re losing friends uh teachers uh people who they love just like we are so not only that they face that but also economic uncertainty not knowing is my family G to have a place
To live or stay uh so so so many of these challenges and then you know even before the pandemic and moving um post covid even though we’re not right but looking at schools and the safety component many young don’t feel safe going to school they worry about active
Shooters they don’t know if they’ll be going home or they have to make a call to their parents saying that we’re on lockdown right right so we look at all of these challenges that they’re facing and would I like to uh would I like to present to adults
Who were working with youth the youth Advocates whether that’s parents Educators mentors or relatives caregivers I like to present to them this notion of intergenerational empathy because I think it’s important for us to look at uh how young people are growing up in the 21st century and stop the
Comparisons yeah yeah okay so I’m going to pause just for a second there because I think this is like a movement like this is a big thing on social media and I’m a millennial and I hear a lot of like Millennials I don’t want to say like dissing Boomers but it’s just this
Whole thing where like for example buying a house like that is a huge issue where you know they’ll say the boomers are like oh well you know you need to work harder and you need to do this but I mean you really have to look at like
What is our economy looking like now how do we have the empathy and the understanding and the resilience to say okay well times were different you know $30,000 in 1980 was was probably good but now I mean $75,000 is not even middle class in some
Places to even you know buy a house get groceries live comfortably that’s not even luxury so I I would love for those of you who aren’t familiar with intergenerational um did you say empathy in intergenerational empathy and understanding yeah can you explain what that means because some of our people
May not understand what that actually means yes so when I think of intergenerational empathy and understanding I’m looking at it out of a lens of this Collective empathy right being able to maybe you don’t understand completely right but you have your own lived experiences and recognizing and honoring others uh for example knowing
That young people uh Generation Z and Alpha uh those young people are are facing challenges that we may have never imagined um look looking at not so much as oh this generation or they’re soft or they’re weak but they are resilient yeah they are resilient and in fact some of
Them are facing challenges in a way that often leads them to feeling alone like they they don’t really have the support that many of us had because I know growing up you know I’m actually right on the cusp of Gen X and Millennial right so so growing up I had a a huge
Sense of community the neighbors you the neighbors were allowed to discipline you right but the neighbor your neighbors were also uh really actively involved in your development like I had neighbors who were like you know the aunties and uncles of all the kids in the neighborhood right yeah if you were
Having trouble at home we could go to them we can go over to their house and we wouldn’t get in trouble or uh discipline uh for it right the the neighbors really cared uh they weren’t worried about facing you know oh legalities um having they weren’t worried about those things they they
Were a community and really uh that was the focus like protecting the community heck back when when I was growing up you had gangs but some of these gang members they were actually the Protectors of the community right uh I know even in my mom’s generation and older Generations
Boomers right they The Gangs weren’t about terrorizing the neighborhood they were actually about protecting it yeah yeah in a in a sense of like Brotherhood and and just um because when I was listening to your Ted Talk that you talked about the gangs and and and I
Think a lot of it for me when I think about it like we want to belong everyone wants to feel like they belong somewhere they want to feel like they have a purpose they want to loved so if you’re not getting it in the maso’s hierarchy
Of needs you’re going to find your need somewhere and there’s there’s some sort of I mean if we think back to soror black sororities and and um fraternities like those were started so we had a place now that’s obviously organized and and for the greater good of the
Community versus gangs it’s kind of the same mindset of Brotherhood but it’s I guess more in a crime kind of infested you get what I’m saying I get it yes yes but yeah I just I just had that thought I just wanted to interject but go right
Ahead no problem so recognizing that uh 21st century twin and teens are facing these different types of challenges uh on top of living in a digital or as I call too much information world right where they have exposure to things that yeah we we couldn’t even fathom right
Yeah so understanding that we are making these comparisons they’re actually unfair yes and we should I tell people to lead with love and not fear yes and I’m telling you that can change things so when you’re leading with empath empathy and understanding uh you’re able to build a
Deeper connection with the young people in your lives and I think that it has to happen collectively because it’s not just up to the parents it’s not just up to the teachers uh each and every one of us has responsibility to take care of the kids in our schools our communities
And our homes yes yeah no I I love that you’re touching on that because I do feel that there is you know each generation has their thing and I know that you know the my my parents probably said oh you know your grandparents said this about our generation and there’s
Always something but I think that I don’t and I can’t speak to when my parents were kids but I do feel that that is there’s been so much that has happened especially with Co and I think that unveiled a lot and in terms of Milestones so one of my areas of
Expertise is literacy and so I have a coaching side of my business but I have an ed therapy side of my business and and really working with dyslexic kids more so the brown and black community that’s where a whole bunch of families saw what’s going going on in schools
Until their kids were at home doing virtual school and they’re like my kids in second grade why are they not learning to read like what is happening here and a lot of them what some of the students I work with now are in you know fourth grade or fifth grade and so yeah
They were like in kindergarten first grade then and so I get a lot of well they were a covid kid you know they were uh you know they didn’t learn to read and I’m like oh my gosh you know like this is just we don’t think about those
Milestones and we don’t really consider consider it’s not that they’re not working hard it’s just that this was kind of a disadvantage no one ever really I don’t think anybody ever thought that all of a sudden there’d be a movement for people wanting to work remotely to not want to commute anymore
So that is a whole GameChanger as well and I feel like that builds a level of resiliency too yeah I definitely think so um and just knowing that they can they can move through it right we look at resiliency resilience as uh it’s a muscle right something that you build you know but
It’s also not something that right it’s it’s something that we want to make sure uh the young people in our lives have resilience but it’s also our job to make it so that the circumstances in their lives they don’t have to always struggle and have these challenges
Because when people when I hear all of that negative talk about this generation being soft or they have it easy my thing is they should have it easier than we did each generation should have some of the trauma lifted should have more opportunities to reach their goals uh we
This is what we’re working toward right that’s what at least that’s what I thought you know I get it one and two instill certain values in in your your children or um your your students mentees but at the same time we have to understand that we it’s it’s our job um
To help them and and support them in getting to uh their goals we want to help them you know reach their full potential well how are we gonna help them reach their full potential if we’re knocking them down yeah you know so when you were talking I was thinking of a lot of
Different angles more specifically in our community in a sense that you know and I think a lot of this really goes back to slavery just how we were reprimanded or you know just certain ways that you would know you know I I have a black mom you know
Certain things that we say like oh well white people you know do this and we do this and I just think while there’s some kind of humor and like oh yeah that happened in my house too there’s still trauma with that and my question to you
I mean this is still formulating as I’m talking but like I don’t believe that we should keep passing down that trauma but I also don’t know if our previous generations know that they’re still passing down that generation I mean that uh trauma so then it leads to some of the comments
That you’re saying you know this generation’s soft and this and all that and it’s just how can we I guess how do you work work through that with with your mentoring you know in your in your empowered flower girl organization I mean are these things
That you talk about I mean I don’t know if that makes sense like I said this question is literally coming to me as as I’m listening and I’m like this is actually a problem in our community where it’s like we need to stop we need to break the dysfunction and that cycle
We do we really do and it’s hard and when you’re that person who is breaking it then all of a sudden you’re like you know ostracized and you’re disrespectful I’m like no I’m just setting boundaries boundaries that that’s the word right yes yes but I want your thoughts on that
Yeah there you know there’s no one size fits all solutions there are many of them right but one of the things that I’ve done in my work with Empower flower girl uh in some of our workshops and programs while we focus a lot on on uh young people’s relationships with one another and
Themselves we also like to bring in a component of working with parents yeah so there are some programs for instance we have a workshop called chica chat and I really love chica chat because it helps girls and young women and youth who identifies female it really helps
Them to get to know one another in a safe space where they can share uh some of the challenges that they face but also give advice to each other uh we also challenge stereotypes and help uh young people really get to know one another on a deeper level and what I
Found that once they get to know one another uh they are less likely to engage in in the bullying and the social exclusion those sorts of things when they find out oh yes my classmate well they’re facing homelessness or yeah this young per another young person in
My class well they lost their mom recently or you know parents went through a divorce so they have more empathy right for their classmates and they’re able to get to know one another uh on a different level right right but one of the things that we do is we will
Have some of these workshops where we bring in the parents as well right because I’ve been finding okay A lot of times someone does this they’re like sides so uh I I found that a lot of the times the the girls and young women they’re having challenges with each
Other in the classroom uh but because they also have moms in their homes who are having these same sorts of challenges with their friends or their co-workers no women haven’t really uh had a chance to get the type of care and help that they need right so many of
Their mothers may not have gone through therapy or may they haven’t had an opportunity to build strong relationships right so a lot of them are passing like you said passing these things along uh but I want to make sure that also we’re getting to the parents like those youth Advocates because
Parents you know they’re youth Advocates as well right right along with the teachers so oftentimes parents don’t necessarily get an opportunity to be a part of uh the the these programs so I I love it when I work with a school or Community organization that says hey uh
We love to have you come work with the girls uh but we also would about if we did a mother daughter version of The Chica chat so a lot of the work we will bring in the parents so we can continue to Foster that intergenerational empathy and understanding because they need
Support uh they need help as they are raising their children and I have really transitioned a lot of the work that we’re doing uh to help support the youth Advocates mentors parents Educators yeah wow that’s amazing and I think so many of us don’t realize how much a mentor can really make a
Difference in in one one child’s life yes you know just having that consistent person so my background is special ed and um I always found the most challenging kids the best because they actually needed that consistency you know the teachers that were afraid oh well this kid’s going to do this or I
Can’t deal with this well honestly like what they need is that consistency what they need is someone showing up for them what they need is someone believing in them because my my whole thing is as a as a parent but also as as an educator is they’re kids okay so they’re a
Product of their environment and it’s our job as the adults and the mentors to say all right this kid is is is veering off you know how do we how do we get them to see you know get back over here and see the light to say you can be
Somebody this is you don’t have to choose this path and I think that when we put in that work we do see you know the the fruits of our labor and it’s it’s not an easy task and it’s not a quick fix either but I mean you clearly
Have the the passion and the the love for this to make that systemic change because you and I both know our commity Community needs this and we and nobody’s going to save us but ourselves that is right and and that’s one of the reasons why I I’m so passionate about helping young
People to uh to live above these challenges uh our mission is to help them live above those challenges so they can make a difference in the world yes because you know they they are the not even Next Generation leaders they are the now generation leaders right yes uh
And we want to make sure that they’re equipped to be able to one handle the challenges but to also take advantage of the incredible opportunities to them right and to give them the resources that they need if if they have their own ideas for uh nonprofits or yes want to start U some
Sort of initiative to give back and and make a difference and create this change uh we want to give them the foundations so they can do it we love showcasing young people through our she’s empowered program so it’s for girls and young women non-binary youth who uh are
Creating change in their communities who are uh artists activists authors I love that yeah so we want to showcase the good work that they’re doing in the world so that young people know we really care about them and it’s not just about what bad young people are
Doing that’s bad or wrong always putting them down uh no we we need to Showcase uh them when uh they’re contributing when they are um when they’re doing things that you know should be recognized and maybe they don’t get recognition for on a day-to-day basis right so we want to make sure that
They’re they’re in the Forefront that we are having our young people on display in the way that makes them feel proud other s yes I love this wow so rashita this was a really amazing conversation and so I’m so sorry we have to like conclude this episode but I think we really
Dropped some nuggets and gems and before we conclude I do want you to share how can our audience uh reach you you know is there a signature product that you know you really want to promote where they can reach out and and get to know you a little bit better your business so
Why don’t you share that with our audience yeah thank you so much uh I can’t believe you your time flies I was like w this conversation is good I know we’ll have to continue offline or something sure thank you so much so if anyone wants to connect with empowered
Flower girl we’re on social media Instagram Facebook as well as LinkedIn at empowered flowergirl uh you can also check out our website empowered flowergirl to learn more about our programs uh one of the programs and initiatives that is near and dear to my heart is our girl
World Peace Academy and that’s for the Youth Advocates those who want to uh build deeper connections with the young people in their lives um especially those who are more motivated to help our girls and and young women uh and gender expansive youth to help them to again live above those challenges and support
Them in um going out into their communities and making a positive impact because I know that at the end of the day that’s what we want yeah for our young people and rather you know you’re a teacher or a parent a mentor you run an after school program but you’re just
Looking to take it to the next level or you’re looking to start a mentoring program or kindness club or some sort of Youth I like that yeah some Le youth empowered initiative uh we give you the tools and support and strategies that you need to you know make those
Connections with the youth but also to get get noticed for the good that you’re doing in the world yeah so Rashida you’re based in Detroit right yes I’m based in Detroit so how so if if if someone in California wants your services how does that work yeah so
Thank you for asking that so thank you for asking that because the girl world piece Academy is virtual it’s a virtual program but I I work with school districts um schools throughout the US Canada UK and yes yes yes internation I love that and that’s actually one of the good things about
Covid you know we really are have expanded like hey I can do business I’ve done presentations in Africa in this room and I love it exactly yes oh I love this so okay those of you who are excited to really click and and see what empowered flower girl is all about be
Sure to to click the show notes it’s in the show notes if you are listening it’s in the show notes in the YouTube page you know where to look so I am just so thrilled to have you on this week’s episode and yes this has been such an
Amazing conversation I love I love meeting such strong women especially strong black women who really are doing good in the world it’s it really it’s just it it really warms my heart like seriously so this was such a great conversation and yeah I’ll see you guys next
Week y see you then thank you for joining us this week on the resilience unlimited show be sure to hit subscribe wherever you get your podcasts subscribe on our YouTube channel and follow us on social media see you next week divas and don’t forget stay Resilient w
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